A Love Letter to Whiskey

“It was just him—the old friend, the easy smile, the twisted solace wrapped in a glittering bottle. It was just me—the alcoholic, pretending like I didn’t want to taste him, realizing too quickly that months of being clean didn’t make me crave him any less.”

This is B’s first description of Jamie. It encapsulates how she sees him as something that is illicit and addictive, an idea she maintains throughout most of the novel. The whiskey metaphor also emphasizes how powerless B feels in Jamie’s presence, regardless of their relationship at the time.

“I could tell he didn’t want to talk about the future anymore, and in a way I didn’t blame him. Up until that point in our lives, high school had been our biggest and best experience. It was hard to imagine a future where the things that mattered to us then would only be a distant memory.”

This quote comes while B and Jamie are first opening up to one another and discussing their plans for college and afterward. It emphasizes B and Jamie’s youth and naivety early in their relationship, as well as the fact that they have their whole lives ahead of them. Yet even as they begin to develop other concerns, their relationship still matters.

“I shook my head, dropping my eyes to the housing packet again while my stomach did backflips. Jamie Shaw went to the same college as me. I didn’t know whether to feel lucky or cursed, and the ache in my chest wasn’t helping me decide. I’d avoided him since that night on the beach, letting him go, letting the idea of him go. He was Jenna’s, and then he was gone—end of story.”

B’s realization that she and Jamie will be attending the same college for the next three years shows her reluctance to admit her feelings for Jamie, whom she still views as someone who would be bad for her. Jamie’s presence adds a lot of complication to B’s life, as she can no longer classify him as either “Jenna’s” or “gone.”