Awareness: The Perils and Opportunities of Reality

An attachment, in the context of Awareness, is the core belief that happiness depends on obtaining or keeping a specific person, object, or condition. De Mello identifies this psychological mechanism as the primary obstruction to freedom and the direct source of suffering, defining it as a compulsive craving arising from the conviction that “without something you are not going to be happy” (134). This belief system programs individuals for unhappiness by making their emotional state contingent on external factors that they cannot control. De Mello argues that this craving inevitably “distorts and destroys perception” (133) because people begin to see the world only in terms of what fosters or threatens their attachments. He frequently likens common attachments (such as the need for approval, success, and attention) to addictive drugs that provide a temporary thrill but ultimately keep people mired in a state of dependency, fear, and misery. The solution is to transform desire into a simple preference, which allows people to enjoy reality as it is without chasing an ever-retreating illusion of happiness.