Behind the Net

Pippa thinks again of how Zach laughed at her, then thinks of Jamie calling her songbird and telling her she’s tough. She realizes that her “song is about becoming a new person” (106), and Pippa wonders if the closeness she felt with Zach was ever real. When she finishes, she feels excited and proud. Jamie tells her Zach was never good enough for her, and Pippa realizes he remembers her from high school. She admits she remembers him, and Jamie is pleased that she calls him gorgeous. However, Pippa is wary of falling for Jamie, sure she’ll be crushed.

As Coach Ward preps the team for playing the Calgary Cougars, Jamie recalls Pippa playing and singing for him. He thinks, “I hope she knows she isn’t broken. I hope she realizes what she’s capable of” (112). He realizes Pippa has become a distraction and challenges himself to stay away from her.

Rory Miller, Jamie’s nemesis and former best friend, plays for Calgary. Jamie sees Pippa sitting with his mom behind the net and feels calmer knowing Pippa is there, but when he sees Rory look Pippa’s way, he gets distracted and lets a puck pass him into the net. After the game, Jamie is annoyed to see Rory talking to Pippa, asking her to show him around town. Hayden Owens invites Pippa to go out with the team, and Jamie decides to go along. He wants to see Pippa having fun.

They go to the Filthy Flamingo, where a musician plays the guitar on stage. Pippa starts to wonder if Jamie could be attracted to her but thinks, “I’ve been the quiet, invisible girl in the background for so long that it feels unfathomable” (120). Pippa receives a text from someone on Zach’s tour saying Pippa is invited to the wrap party in Vancouver. Jamie makes a deal with her: If she sings a song on stage, he’ll go to the wrap party with her.

Pippa is nervous and scared. She plays a song that her dad likes, and she enjoys performing. When she steps away from the stage, Jamie kisses her.

Pippa feels she has never been kissed like this. When Jamie pulls away and says he lost his head, she feels hurt. She decides she can’t get involved with Jamie because, as she tells herself, “If I let him, he will devastate me” (129).

Jamie reflects that Pippa makes him lose control, but he believes “[he] can’t give her more than casual, and [he] know[s] that’s not enough for her” (131). He also realizes that he wouldn’t be able to bear it if he crushed Pippa’s heart the way he crushed Erin. He wants Pippa to be as happy as she seemed while singing and playing music. He gives her his jacket to wear on the walk back to his apartment.

Pippa dresses up for the wrap party and is pleased by Jamie’s reaction to her appearance. She’s heard him masturbating in his room, and she, too, has masturbated to thoughts of him. Jamie drives them to the party, and Pippa is delighted by his several caring acts. She reminds herself that Jamie takes care of everyone in his life. When he sees that she is nervous, Jamie calls her songbird and says, “I’m your goalie, […] I’ll block all your shots tonight” (140).

The party is crowded, and the blonde woman Pippa saw playing with Zach is upstairs in the VIP section. Jamie introduces himself as Pippa’s boyfriend. Pippa knows she would be terrified on her own but with Jamie, she reflects, “[I]t feels like we’re in it together” (144). They are invited upstairs to the VIP section, and Pippa feels repulsed when Zach hugs her. He introduces Layla, and when Pippa sees how Zach is dismissive of her, she pities the girl. Jamie has Pippa sit on his lap, and she enjoys feeling his erection, thinking, “It feels good to be someone more than the girl who got stepped on” (149).

Having Pippa on his lap arouses Jamie. He feels smug that Zach realizes Pippa is moving on. He feels protective of her and asks how Zach was in bed. Pippa confesses that she could never have an orgasm with Zach. Jamie feels competitive about this. Pippa asks Jamie why he doesn’t date, and he relates that he was with Erin when they were 19. Jamie tells Pippa he can only handle two things, hockey and his mom, but then he tells Pippa to kiss him.

Jamie tells Pippa to kiss him because Zach is watching but thinks, “I kiss Pippa like I mean it. Like she’s air and I’m about to suffocate” (157). Zach interrupts them, and Jamie announces that they are leaving the party.

While the team is out in Houston, Hayden says Jamie plays better when Pippa is at the game. Jamie thinks of Pippa often. He still doesn’t want to break her heart and end up in the same category as Zach, but he also enjoys texting her. She apologizes for talking about her and Zach’s sex life, saying it was unprofessional. Jamie thinks, “I need to fix this for her. I need to take care of her” (164). Jamie has several drinks and orders Pippa a sex toy online.

As he is headed back to Vancouver, Jamie gets a notification that his package is arriving. He’s mortified to recall that he ordered Pippa a sex toy. He realizes this is not appropriate if they’re trying to keep their relationship professional. He races home only to discover that the package arrived, and Pippa “is currently using it in her bedroom” (171).

Pippa is delighted with her new toy. She thinks of Jamie while she uses it and decides to thank Hazel for sending the gift. She greets Jamie in the kitchen, and he seems grumpy.

After Jamie leaves for practice, Pippa plays her guitar a bit but doesn’t get inspiration for any lyrics. As she hikes with Hazel, she discusses the marketing job and discovers Hazel didn’t send her the sex toy. Hazel jokes that Jamie likes Pippa, and Pippa realizes they are developing a friendship. She realizes, “Nothing about this is uncomplicated. My emotions are already fully involved, and if I let it go any further, it’s going to hurt like hell” (178).

Jamie makes dinner for Pippa but is nervous and tense. He asks her to play, and he likes the hopeful song she sings about getting back on the horse after falling off. He tells her to believe in herself, and he enjoys the sense of family he feels with Pippa. He reveals that when his mom was experiencing episodes of depression when he was a kid, he cooked the meals. She asks why Jamie bought her the toy. He asks if he can watch her use it. When she says yes, he kisses her.

Pippa thinks kissing Jamie is “like drinking water after a marathon” (189). She enjoys how Jamie is bossy and demands she strip naked and climb on the bed. She thinks, “This is either the most intimidating thing I’ve experienced, or the hottest” (193). She uses the toy while he watches but isn’t able to climax. Jamie says she’s stuck in her head, and he has an idea.

Jamie sits Pippa on his lap and uses the toy to stimulate her to orgasm. Pippa thinks, “My body isn’t mine; it’s his. He owns it. He’s wielding it however he pleases, and I’m just along for the ride” (201).

Pippa has an intense orgasm and then wants to touch Jamie. She uses her hands to help him have an orgasm and when he kisses her afterward, Pippa wonders, “Is that what sex is like for other people? What the hell was I doing with Zach all those years?” (206). Jamie notices several missed calls from his mother.