Born Behind Bars

“‘But, Amma, what’s the point of being good if the police might lock you up anyway? Especially if you’re poor like us?’ I’d asked.

‘If you’re good, God will be happy,’ Amma said. […]

‘Never mind about God, boy!’ Grandma Knife told me. ‘Be good for your own sake. If you’re good and make friends with good people, you’ll have a better chance of a good life once you get out of here.’ […]

I decide I’d better be good […] most of all, because I know it’ll make Amma happy. […]

Amma beams me a smile sweeter than the candy melting on my tongue. I’m glad I was good, because her smile will stay inside me long after the candy is gone.”

Adults give Kabir several reasons to be “good,” but preventing more prison time isn’t really one of them, because due to caste-based prejudice, he could easily get sent back regardless, just as Amma was sent to prison originally. To Kabir, the best reason to be good isn’t to help himself or even avoid Hell but to please Amma; this helps develops The Importance of Friendship and Family as a theme.

“Before this, Amma was a maid in a house where a rich family lived. A house is a place filled with rooms, and all the rooms belong to just one family. In houses, doors are locked from the inside. In houses, doors don’t have bars through which guards can peek in anytime.”

This quote develops the difference between a house (a type of building) and a home (which is more than a building, a place filled with people who care for each other). However, some aspects of prison don’t match Amma’s ideal home, despite their being together there. Amma’s idea of home isn’t just being together but being free together, as they eventually are when Amma comes to live in Patti and Thatha’s apartment, which may not be a “house” either but is surely a “home.”

“A guest in the big house accused Amma of stealing her diamond necklace, and the police locked Amma away. Amma said the police didn’t care if they’d caught the right person after they found out that Amma grew up in an orphanage and was low-caste.

Because she was poor, she couldn’t get a lawyer to help her out. She never even got to stand in court and plead that she was not guilty.

‘When they stuck me in here, I almost lost hope, Kabir. Then I found out I was having you, and I started hoping again,’ Amma told me. ‘You saved my life.’

I didn’t actually save her life, not like heroes in the movies or anything. She only says that because she believes you sort of die inside if you stop hoping, even if your body keeps on going.”

This quote thematically helps develop The Drawbacks of the Caste and Prison Systems by showing how, simply because of her caste and not because of any crimes, Amma ended up imprisoned for a decade. Additionally, this quote helps develop Resilience and Positivity as Tools for Change as a theme because Amma encourages Kabir never to give up hope in the face of adversity.

“I love talking to Amma in Kannada. I love that no one else here understands it. I love how, when we speak it to each other, it feels almost as if we’re alone, sharing secrets.”

Kabir has few opportunities to be completely alone or even alone with Amma because they share a cell with other women. However, he cherishes their private conversations in Kannada, a language that most local people in Chennai don’t speak. Later when he travels to Bengaluru, being bilingual is useful in navigating the city.

“The only visitors the rest of us get are insects […] ants [that] come crawling in like the sad thoughts that sneak in when I wonder why Appa disappeared. One of my saddest thoughts is maybe Appa stopped writing because he stopped caring about Amma.

But whenever that worry enters, I drive it away as fast as I can, just as you have to chase away an ant as soon as you spot it. If you don’t, they invite others to join them. And soon you have an endless line of sad thoughts chewing at your heart.”

Kabir uses the simile of ants to describe intrusive thoughts and sad feelings. Just as with ants, unless he shoos the thoughts away immediately, more will come and make matters even worse. This illustrates the importance of positive thinking, and supports the theme of Resilience and Positivity as Tools for Change.

“‘Let’s work on your puzzle,’ Malli says. She means my favorite puzzle, with the picture of a river on it. It’s not mine, of course.

Although some of the pieces are missing, I love putting the puzzle together and slowly seeing a whole world appear—a big, swirly river surrounded by trees and flowers. A world so different from our square rooms, with iron bars on every window, and lines of barbed wire that pierce our sky.”

This quote further develops puzzles as a symbol for the larger world and Kabir’s place in it. Although the puzzle is mysterious and confusing because he has never left the prison, he solves it with his friend Malli, which illustrates The Importance of Family and Friendship thematically and foreshadows how, out in the world, Kabir likewise solves “puzzles” or problems with help from new friends and family members.

“‘Last thing it did was visit us,’ Bedi Ma’am said. ‘Maybe to show you how colorful the world can be. And how beautiful.’ […]

‘Butterflies look so delicate, but they’re strong. And brave. And smart. No one teaches them how to use their new wings. But they’re ready to try, all on their own.’”

Kabir draws inspiration from butterflies, which protect and transform themselves without any apparent instruction from their mothers or anyone else. The novel uses butterflies as a metaphor for resilience and positive change, thematically helping develop the theme of Resilience and Positivity as Tools for Change and guiding Kabir to never give up hope in his own life.

“I used to count on two people believing in me—Amma and Bedi Ma’am. Now I realize there are three. Grandma Knife believes in me too.

‘And remember, Kabir, if you have to chuck a stone at someone to protect yourself, do it.’”

Grandma Knife’s faith in Kabir thematically contributes to developing The Importance of Friendship and Family. Not only does knowing that a third person cares about him give him strength, but he also learns the importance of self-love and self-protection from Grandma Knife. Since she won’t be there to protect him anymore, this is a valuable lesson for her to teach him: that it’s okay to protect himself. Her words foreshadow the threat Kabir later faces from Fake Uncle and how he must act in self-defense to escape.

“‘I’m grateful to God you’ll finally have a proper home.’

‘This is my home,’ I say.

‘No,’ she says. ‘This is jail. Home is where you’re looked after by people who love you.’

‘Then this is home,’ I argue. ‘Because you love me.’”

This passage complicates the concept of “home.” Kabir reasons that because Amma is with him, prison counts as “home.” However, Amma explains that although they’re together, prison doesn’t really allow her to care for Kabir the way she’d like. In either case, though, their being together is the most important part.

“‘Ma’am, do you think there’s a way I can help Amma get out of jail?’ I ask my teacher on my last day of jail school.

‘Why not?’ Bedi Ma’am says. ‘You can try to do anything. If you study hard, maybe you can become a lawyer when you grow up.’ […]

‘Will I ever see you again?’ Malli hugs me tight.

‘Why not?’ I echo Bedi Ma’am’s words, and I hug her back just as hard.”

Bedi Ma’am’s words “Why not?” sum up one of her most important lessons to Kabir, suggesting that he can potentially do anything he sets his mind to and that the biggest obstacle is doubt. This illustrates the theme of Resilience and Positivity as Tools for Change. Not only does this advice help Kabir, but he internalizes the advice and shares it with other people, like Malli and Rani, creating a web of positive thinking.

“I touch the butterfly one last time. I can do what I want with it. Because it’s all mine.

It means so much to me that I give it to Malli.”

Here, the butterfly symbolizes Kabir’s ability to protect himself and to transform into something better; however, this doesn’t mean that he must keep the butterfly physically with him. To Kabir, the most important things are family and friendship, so giving the butterfly to Malli is more meaningful because this way, she can marvel at its beauty, which Kabir already understands but Malli, being five, might need more time to fully appreciate.

“Moon, moon, come running to me…climb over the mountain and bring me a jasmine flower.”

Amma sings this lullaby to Kabir on his last night in the prison with her, and she used to sing it when he was a baby. He doesn’t initially understand its meaning and is frustrated, but Rani later interprets it as a song about the moon, which is resilient in a similar way to a butterfly. Although a butterfly transforms only once and the moon’s appearance transforms every month, the moon never gives up and always becomes full again despite constantly having to start from scratch. Similarly, Kabir can keep trying to accomplish his goals despite sometimes failing along the way.

“He locks me in the room, and I can’t escape the feeling I’ve moved into a different kind of prison. One that’s miles away from Amma’s soft voice.”

This quote elaborates on the concept of prisons and cages. Amma hoped that Fake Uncle would show Kabir a real home, but instead Fake Uncle attempts to sell him into human trafficking, which (as Kabir notes) would be a different type of prison but still a prison. Kabir quickly learns that literal prison isn’t the only “cage” that humans, especially children of the lower castes, can be trapped in.

“‘Such a strange world we live in,’ she says when I finish. ‘They lock up nice mothers. But guys who buy and sell kids get to roam free.’”

Throughout the text, Kabir and Rani both remark that the world is “strange,” whenever they encounter bizarre contradictions like this one. Rani and Kabir may be children with limited experience of the world, but they’re logical enough to see that the world doesn’t always make sense. This makes it much harder to decipher the puzzle, because the world doesn’t always work according to logic, reason, or fairness.

“I hate the sound of the cage door snapping shut. ‘Does he have to go in a cage? It reminds me of jail.’

‘It’s not a jail to him,’ she says. ‘He likes it, and the bars protect him from other animals. Bars aren’t just for locking people up, you know. Lots of people have bars on their windows to protect their stuff, because they’re scared other people will steal.’

I think about the tall wall around the house where Amma and Appa worked. All the mansions in that neighborhood had iron grilles on the windows. Funny to think how rich people, who can be free, build fancy cages to live in. Probably because they’re afraid of poor people like us.

And not so funny to think how they’re so afraid that they lock up innocent people like Amma. My heart clenches as tightly as a fist when I think about how much she’s suffered. How much she’s still suffering every single day.”

This quote from Chapter 40 also appears before Chapter 1 to emphasize its importance. The quote complicates the concept of cages by pointing out that, for some, “cages” that lock from the inside make them feel more comfortable and protected from others who might break in. However, Kabir intuits that part of this need to feel “protected” is really just caste-based prejudice.

“‘You’re so funny, Kabir. You sing about the moon and you don’t see what it does? It never gives up.’

‘What do you mean, the moon never gives up?’

‘Each month it gets whittled away and has to start from nothing and build itself up again. It returns, full and shiny, every month. You shouldn’t give up either.’

I wonder if Amma’s lullaby about the moon climbing over mountains to bring us flowers was a message about how the moon never gives up too.”

Here, Rani explains her interpretation of Amma’s moon lullaby, which (according to Rani) is about resilience in the face of challenges, supporting the theme of Resilience and Positivity as Tools for Change. The moon is arguably even more resilient than a butterfly because in a simple interpretation it must transform the same way every month, but it never gives up, just as Kabir shouldn’t.

“The weather has been changing. Every year it gets hotter. The monsoon fails. Rivers run dry. Water gets scarce, and there isn’t enough food to go around. And when your stomach is empty, it’s easy to fill your soul with rage and start fighting for no good reason with other innocent people.”

An older woman on the train to Bengaluru, whom Kabir nicknames “Aunty Silver,” shares this wisdom with him. This quote complicates the difference between safe and unsafe adults: Kabir has been trying to learn the difference between the two, but he’s learning that some people may be temporarily unsafe due to their hunger, anger, and frustration. Again, Kabir is learning that the world and its people aren’t always logical or fair.

“What a strange world. The chatty cook I met for a few minutes was kind enough to go out of her way to help me, but the policemen who’d worked in the jail where I’d lived all my life hadn’t bothered to check if they were sending me to the right person.”

In Quote 15, Rani comments on the world’s strangeness for similar reasons. Here, Kabir echoes that thought in noting how the warden, whose literal job was to care for Kabir, did a worse job of it than a random stranger. This complicates the difference between safe and unsafe adults because the warden, whom the state sanctions, was incredibly unsafe, placing Kabir into the hands of child traffickers, whereas a cook he met briefly actually went to great lengths to help him.

“My light. My home. I try on those words as if they’re a new pair of slippers that don’t quite fit.

But though I’m not yet used to this room, it already feels safe and so comfortable. I guess that’s what Amma tried to tell me—home is a feeling, not a place. Except I won’t ever feel truly at home until she’s safe and comfortable with me.”

Kabir is impressed by some material aspects of Patti and Thatha’s home, but the most important things that make it a home are the feelings of safety, freedom, and love. Still, he doesn’t feel fully home or free without Amma, which contributes thematically to developing The Importance of Family and Friendship.

“‘Your father loved to help me cook too,’ Patti tells me. ‘Not a lot of boys helped their mothers in the kitchen, but he always did things he enjoyed and didn’t worry about what others thought. He was never scared to try new things either—like moving to Chennai on his own, and then to Dubai. He used to say, ‘Fear is a lock, and courage is a key we hold in our hands.’”

This passage further develops the different types of cages that exist in addition to literal prison. Now that Kabir’s every move isn’t dictated inside a prison, his biggest potential obstacle becomes his own fear and doubt, which can prevent people from even trying to achieve their goals. This isn’t to say that there aren’t tremendous outside obstacles, but having courage and faith in one’s power is a necessary first step to overcoming outside obstacles.

“After Patti leaves, I stare out at the moon. It’s torn in half, but I remember what Rani said.

It’ll grow back.”

Again, Kabir reflects on how the moon’s appearance changes, but nevertheless the moon tries over and over, never giving up despite continuous obstacles. This demonstrates determination in the face of adversity, not just a one-time miracle. Kabir finally understands Rani’s interpretation of the lullaby. Of course, the moon isn’t really “torn in half”; Earth is casting a shadow. The important thing here, however, is that the moon is reliable in its changes and thus symbolizes resilience in its persistence.

“‘When I grow up,’ Lakshman says in a grand voice, ‘I am going to become a lawyer who helps people who don’t have money. You think I can do that?’

‘Why not?’ I smile, thinking of Bedi Ma’am’s words, which feel so long ago now.”

Kabir internalized Bedi Ma’am’s lesson about hope and having faith in oneself, taking it to heart, and spreads it to other friends including Lakshman, creating a web of positivity by encouraging his friend to have faith in his potential. This illustrates how being resilient and positive doesn’t just help oneself but can also help others through the power of influence.

“I think of the skinny tree in the jail schoolyard and how much it must have struggled to grow without anyone taking care of it. I suppose Amma is struggling in her own way, scared to hope that I’ll actually be able to get her out of jail, because it’s hard enough just to get through each long jail day.

In jail, every day had the same routine.

After jail, with Rani, days were never the same, because nearly everything felt new.

I felt scared a lot, though, which feels kind of like jail too. I’m learning to break out of the fear now, taking small steps each day. […]

For now, I’m enjoying learning new routines. At Patti and Thatha’s home, repetition feels comforting, like a song’s rhythm.”

Kabir further reflects on the nature of home versus the nature of cages. They’re seemingly opposing concepts, but they also overlap. For example, even having found a true home in the outside world, it’s still not complete without Amma. Additionally, fear can become its own cage even in a safe place. However, Kabir has faced a lifetime of learning about the world in just months and has overcome self-doubt about his ability to do things that many people never face. He’s confident that he has not only found a home but has helped create one.