Criss Cross

As summer descends on Seldem, the primary characters are granted more time to devote to their common Journey Towards Self-Discovery. The end of the school year marks the start of long, lazy days in the characters’ suburban hometown. Without the structure of school, Debbie, Hector, Lenny, Patty, and Phil are left to their own devices. They spend time lying out in their yards, fixing their bikes, listening to the radio, driving cars, listening to music, attending fairs, going out for ice cream, and lazing about at home. Because none of the primary characters leaves town for vacation, the narrative has a static atmosphere, which causes Debbie, Hector, Lenny, Patty, and Phil to feel more restless. Their lack of structured activities intensifies their Search for Meaning and Understanding. Over the course of Chapters 18-25, the primary characters devote increasing time to musing on who they have been in the past and who they want to become. This is particularly true because summer marks both an ending and a beginning. The characters are in a transitional season, which mirrors their transitional stage of development.

The images of Debbie spending time in the spare bedroom capture how her mother’s past is influencing her evolving adolescent identity. In the spare room, Debbie sifts through boxes, albums, yearbooks, paperwork, “and other odds and ends from Helen Pelbry’s youth, her life before marriage” (165). This ephemera offers Debbie an unexpected window into her mother’s personal history. When she sees Helen’s yearbook photo, for example, she wonders what she might do to be more like the girl in the picture. Her internal monologue in this scene conveys the philosophical nature of Debbie’s coming of age journey:

Helen Brandt’s seventeen-year-old face smiled out of the yearbook page. She looked lively and confident. She looked poised. In some ways the past looked like a nicer place than the present. […] Still, the girl in the picture looked like she knew how to make things be golden for her. How did she do it? Maybe that’s what Debbie wanted to know (166).

Debbie compares herself to her mom. Whereas Debbie feels plain and underdeveloped, her mom looks content, free, and assured. The diction “nicer” and “golden” evokes notions of an idyllic utopia Debbie believes her mother inhabited when she was her age. This pictographic portal into the past offers Debbie a new way of seeing herself in the present. Perhaps, she wonders, if she can channel her mother’s youthful energy, she might locate a more realized sense of self.

Debbie’s alternating feelings for Dan and Peter also contribute to her self-discovery journey. Before the school year ended, Debbie saw Dan in their common locker bay every day. These consistent passing encounters ignited Debbie’s interest in Dan. When she thinks about Dan, she imagines changing her clothing, hair, and behavior to please him. Once the school year ends and Debbie meets Peter, her thoughts about romance and connection mutate. With Peter, Debbie doesn’t feel compelled to alter her appearance or personality. She speaks in the same voice she uses when she’s with Hector, Lenny, Patty, and Phil. She engages in the same activities, too—driving cars, musing on philosophical topics, and helping Mrs. Bruning. Peter’s character thus magnifies authentic aspects of Debbie’s identity, whereas Dan’s character tamped down Debbie’s uniqueness and elicited self-doubt. The novel uses these relational dynamics to capture how first crushes impact a young person’s self-perception.

Hector’s feelings for Meadow also reiterate the Importance of Friendship and Connection to self-exploration. Hector is drawn to Meadow in much the same way that Debbie was previously drawn to Dan. Hector is filled with hope, possibility, and excitement whenever he sees his crush. Conversely, whenever he sees her with Dan, Hector feels insecure and self-questioning. His feelings for Meadow affect how he sees himself. Further, Hector’s unrequited feelings for Meadow compel him to confide in Phil. At the fair, he shares his feelings with his friend. This is a healthy form of connection that helps Hector process his complex, undefined emotions amidst his ongoing self-discovery journey. The novel thus suggests that relationships—no matter how fleeting or youthful—contribute to every individual’s coming of age.