Do You Remember?

“Graham’s hand is on my arm, and his blue eyes meet mine. He’s fairer than any man I’ve ever dated before—that was never my type. But he obviously won me over.”

Tess thinks it’s odd that she would marry someone like Graham because he isn’t the type of man she’s usually attracted to. Thematically, the second sentence suggests The Reliability of Intuition, while the third suggests The Relationship Between Memory and Identity. When she can’t remember falling for him, she doubts what she knows about herself.

“He’s attractive—objectively speaking—but I don’t feel anything for him.”

Compared to her instant love for Ziggy, Tess is struck by how she feels nothing for Graham except, at times, repugnance and fear. This thematically demonstrates The Reliability of Intuition. Every day, without exception, she experiences a surge of love for her dog and must talk herself into feeling lucky to have Graham.

“As he picks up the glass, Ziggy leaves my side and growls at him, baring an impressive set of teeth. Remind me not to get on Ziggy’s bad side.”

The fact that Ziggy always attacks Graham when he brings Tess a drink foreshadows the fact that Graham is drugging her with beverages. Ziggy symbolizes Tess’s intuition, and the dog’s heightened sense of danger whenever Graham serves her any liquid aligns with her extreme aversion to the pomegranate juice and the fact that Graham puts drugs in her water. Ziggy knows, and so does part of Tess.

“I don’t like any of this. This woman is not here to clean—she clearly has been hired to watch me all day. I’m a prisoner in my own home and she’s my warden. There’s something off about this entire situation.”

Tess uses a metaphor, comparing herself to a prisoner and Camila to a prison warden. This conveys her sense of powerlessness and thematically suggests The Reliability of Intuition. Camila may be on Tess’s side, but it takes her a month to give Tess access to the truth about her diagnosis and remission.

“That feeling of contentment I had only a few minutes earlier has vanished.”

Tess realizes early on “Day One” that she can’t leave her house. When she receives the mysterious texts, she’s appalled when the stranger knows this even before she realizes it. Moments earlier, Tess felt calm and lucky, settled in a relatively uncomplicated sense of self; now, however, Tess has no idea what to believe about her life or herself, which thematically illustrates The Relationship Between Memory and Identity.

“It’s him. I’m sure of it. I knew he would never have abandoned me. We loved each other too much.”

Tess struggles to accept that Harry is no longer part of her life, especially when she learns that she named her dog after his bird. Of all the things that shock her, the idea that Harry betrayed her somehow is the least believable. When she and Camila pass the dog park, where she’s to meet the mysterious texter, Tess senses that the stranger is him and that he remains loyal to her, highlighting The Reliability of Intuition as a theme.

“Lucy is gorgeous, but she never seems to have a boyfriend. Although Harry used to say about her, She’s not as pretty as she seems to think she is. Nobody could be.”

This passage characterizes both Harry and Lucy. Harry appears devoted to Tess, and her intuition supports this appearance, so when he describes Lucy in this way, it feels trustworthy. Harry’s dislike of Lucy foreshadows her vanity and self-centered duplicity. In addition, it characterizes Harry as insightful, especially once the novel reveals Lucy’s deceptive behavior.

“‘Pulled you out of traffic!’ Lucy cackles with laughter. ‘Who told you that?’”

As early as their first conversation, Tess suspects that Lucy isn’t being entirely honest with her about Harry or Tess’s own life. It’s revealing that Tess characterizes Lucy’s laugh as a “cackle,” a word connotatively associated with evil witches. This word choice suggests Tess’s awareness, perhaps both conscious and subconscious, that she can’t trust Lucy.

“All I know is I can’t trust any of my memories anymore.”

When Tess believes that her memory is unreliable—even memories made earlier in the day—she loses her sense of self. If she can forget years of her past and can’t even trust her perceptions and short-term memories, pinning down her own identity—what’s true of her life and personality and what’s not—feels impossible, highlighting The Relationship Between Memory and Identity.

“‘I’m not the hero type.’ He puts his glasses back on. ‘I’m all Clark Kent—no Superman. But I thought there was no harm in telling you I did something heroic for you […] Something that would make you like me better.’”

When Graham explains why he lied to Tess about how they met, he alludes to the comic book superhero Superman and his alter ego, Clark Kent. Graham explains that he’s much more like the mild-mannered Clark, the glasses-wearing nerd whom no one ever suspects of being a hero, than the dashing and charming Superman. He seems to want to garner Tess’s sympathy for him to render her more compliant—even when she catches him in a lie—and it works.

“‘My father is on a cruise?’ That doesn’t sound like him. I don’t think he’s been on one date since my mother died. ‘Why would he go on a cruise?’”

To explain why Tess’s father hasn’t returned her calls, Graham tells her that her father is on a cruise. Tess’s surprise at this news foreshadows the fact that Graham’s story is another lie. This is yet another thematic example of The Reliability of Intuition.

“He’s gone for several minutes—long enough for me to have started eating some of the pad thai noodles straight from the container with the plastic fork they provided.”

Graham orders takeout for dinner, so he only needs to get plates and two waters. This errand shouldn’t take more than a minute or two, realistically, so the fact that he’s gone for long enough that Tess starts eating without him should raise suspicion. He must be doing something else that takes more time, something he isn’t disclosing.

“He pulls a glass from the cabinet above the sink and pours a big heaping glass of blood-red liquid.”

Tess’s associating the pomegranate juice with blood connotatively suggests the danger that Graham poses. A glass of juice should be innocuous and mundane; however, Tess’s description of its color conveys her extreme aversion to it, similar to the way she described Lucy’s laugh as a “cackle.” These word choices suggest Tess’s hunch that these individuals aren’t trustworthy.

“He doesn’t look like somebody who wants to poison me or keep me hostage. He looks like a man who is struggling to juggle work and a wife who has lost her memory. Maybe the message I left myself was wrong. Maybe I was just confused when I wrote it.”

Without her memories, Tess doubts herself. The only reason she has to doubt herself or the message she wrote on herself is that Graham looks the part of a concerned, exhausted, and overworked husband. If she could recall anything about the real Graham, she would remember her feelings about him—and about who she is in relation to him. Her inability to do this, and the self-doubt it causes, thematically underscores The Relationship Between Memory and Identity.

“You contacted me about a month ago. You tracked me down and we met. You told me about your accident and your suspicions about Graham, and you asked me to help you.”

Although Tess’s accident took place a year ago, it took her 11 months to contact Harry. In addition, Graham says that she got Ziggy right after her accident and secretly named him after Harry’s bird, which indicates the continuation of her affection for Harry in the immediate aftermath of her diagnosis. The fact that she waited to contact him until just a month ago foreshadows the revelations in the Epilogue: that she learned her cancer was in remission a month ago, and this gave her a new lease on life and reason to reach out to her true love.

“‘Honestly, you’re not usually like this.’ She sounds genuinely perplexed. ‘You used to be a little scared in the morning, but by the afternoon, you always seemed okay. It’s just this last month you seem to freak out every day.’”

Lucy’s timeline is similar to Harry’s. While Harry says that Tess reached out to him about a month ago, Lucy says Tess’s emotions shifted about a month ago as well. Something must have happened that made Tess “freak out,” and this prompted her to share her feelings with Lucy and find Harry. In addition, this foreshadows the news of Tess’s cancer remission.

“There is something in Graham’s voice that makes me uneasy. Something between patronizing and suspicious. But that might be unfair. He’s been nothing but kind to me since I woke up screaming when I saw him in my bed. I’m sure that’s got to be hard for him.”

Although Tess’s intuition signals to her that Graham isn’t what he seems, she tries to convince herself that she’s wrong. He actively manipulates her to have sympathy for him, as though guilt will keep her compliant. His manipulation is partly successful, but it ultimately can’t compete with her intuition, thematically underscoring The Reliability of Intuition.

“A little tiny snippet of Harry’s voice whispering in my ear. Graham has a desk upstairs. There’s a drawer that’s always locked, and you said you think that’s where he’s keeping whatever he’s giving you. My head snaps back, shaken by the memory that just came back to me. Is that real? Or is it a figment of the imagination of my damaged brain?”

Tess isn’t sure if she can believe her memory of Harry’s words or rely upon herself not to have fabricated them. She can’t know if the visions that seem like memories really are memories, and this leads her to doubt her perception of reality, thematically demonstrating The Relationship Between Memory and Identity.

“‘Graham,’ Lucy says, ‘did you have a chance to see The Ivory Castle?’”

When Lucy comes for dinner, it’s clear that Graham and Lucy have “inside” references, as they discuss an actor they know and a movie they’ve discussed before. This indicates their closeness and foreshadows their affair. In addition, despite claiming to have seen Tess’s favorite movie many times, Graham didn’t pick up on her quotation of a well-known line from the movie, indicating how little he cares about Tess.

“And then I see what’s in his mouth. It’s a set of keys. Graham’s keys. The car keys and the keys to open the front door. I can get out of here.”

As a symbol of Tess’s intuition, Ziggy brings her Graham’s keys, symbolizing her ability to escape and to heal. Intuition is metaphorically the key to unlocking the truth in the absence of definitive memories and the confidence they would give Tess. However, just as her intuition doesn’t alert her to the danger of bringing her phone to McDonald’s, Ziggy has no sense of the threat that technology poses either, thematically underscoring The Dual Nature of Technology.

“I pull into the parking lot of the McDonald’s. Ziggy lets out a yelp from the backseat […] He whimpers again like he’s trying to tell me something.”

Part of Tess must know that Graham could somehow find her. Likewise, her sense that Ziggy is “trying to tell [her] something” suggests that she senses something crucial she doesn’t know but needs to know. Ziggy, perhaps, sees Graham’s car or otherwise senses that Graham is right behind them. Like her intuition, he tries to warn her.

“I squeeze the phone in my hand, but there’s an uneasy feeling in my stomach. I didn’t write Lucy’s name on my leg. I instructed myself to find Harry.”

It occurs to Tess that she could tell her best friend about her suspicions of Graham and ask Lucy for help. However, she realizes that her message specifically identifies Harry as the person she needs to find. Her note doesn’t say to find Harry or Lucy. This realization emphasizes The Reliability of Intuition as a theme because Tess can’t specifically recall any reason that Lucy would be untrustworthy.

“I don’t love the way he turns to watch Camila at the stove, smiling appreciatively at the curve of her legs in her skin-tight jeans. Harry never used to leer at women that way.”

Watching Graham openly ogling Camila’s backside irks Tess. This isn’t because she’s jealous of the attention he gives the younger, beautiful woman. Rather, it’s because it characterizes him as a man who objectifies women. Tess’s insight into his behavior thematically highlights The Reliability of Intuition.