Electric Idol

“The exhaustion on his face only makes him more attractive, which I might find horribly unfair later, but right now I can’t find enough oxygen in this room to breathe. Panic. That’s what I’m feeling. Pure panic. It’s not attraction. It can’t be. Not to him.”

The short sentences in this passage indicate that Eros’s sheer physical aura has reduced Psyche’s capacity for thought. Her inability to breathe in his presence underscores the sense that he is a risk to her life, introducing the element of danger that defines their early relationship. She quickly denies that she might be genuinely drawn to him, and this thought adds to the forbidden nature of their attraction and eventual romance.

“I can see the headlines now. Star-crossed lovers! What will Demeter and Aphrodite think of their children’s secret relationship? Forget stroking out in rage. My mother is going to kill me.”

Psyche’s observation establishes that she is acutely aware of her and Eros’s status as public figures. She also knows from experience that the truth is irrelevant when compared to the mere appearance of a dramatic story. Her hyperbolic description of her mother’s potential reaction also establishes that Demeter is a formidable presence in the Olympian world, as even as an adult, Psyche still polices her own actions, thinking in terms of the impact that she might have on her family’s political stance and overall well-being.

“‘Demeter has been throwing her weight around, thinking she’s anything other than a glorified farmer. This will bring her down a notch.’ Only my mother would consider the death of a child to be bringing someone down a notch.”

Aphrodite’s scorn in this passage is an allusion to Demeter’s status as the harvest goddess of Greek mythology, and it is clear that Aphrodite has no respect for the modern realities of agriculture and food procurement, instead conceiving of a world that is divided between winners and losers. Eros’s distaste at her bloodthirsty nature foreshadows the fact that Psyche will remain a source of conflict that highlights the difference between his preferences and his mother’s demands.

“I…can’t do this. Maybe I do have a soul, dusty and unused though it is, because the thought of ending Psyche’s life feels so fucking repellent to me, I’m about to do something unforgivable. I take a drink of my vodka tonic, the burning of the alcohol doing nothing to clear away the sudden determination taking root inside me.”

The word choice here is another allusion to Greek mythology, as Psyche’s name means “soul.” Burdened by the crimes of his past, Eros doubts that he possesses a soul, and his self-loathing is underscored by the fact that he sees Psyche as moral and pure in a way that he can never be. When he likens his refusal to obey Aphrodite as a form of “determination taking root” inside of him, this strategic wording is a reference to Demeter’s role in agriculture and to Psyche’s love of gardening and plants.

“It warms his eyes and lights up his face. He leans across the table and takes my hands. ‘I love you, Psyche. Let’s get married.’ I break out in goose bumps and my heartbeat picks up until I can hear it in my ears. Even knowing this is fake, I can’t help reacting.”

In this scene, Eros demonstrates his gift for performance, and the repeated references to light on his face highlight the theatrical nature of the moment. Psyche’s reaction is instinctive, her body overtaking her more rational side. Her attraction to Eros is set up as a form of instinct that is beyond her conscious control, and while their attraction inevitably proves to be mutual, her visceral reaction to him also makes her cautious in the early days of their romance, as she has no wish to sacrifice her autonomy.

“I speak through gritted teeth that I hope look like a grin. ‘We haven’t started this yet.’ ‘We started it the second you said yes. Relax and stop grinding your teeth.’ He smiles down at me—his liar’s smile with warm eyes and sweetly curved lips. ‘We’re in love, after all.’”

This exchange demonstrates Eros’s greater comfort with public performance, perhaps because he has accepted his attraction to Psyche while she resists being drawn to him. He senses that she is grimacing, and the moment proves that he is highly attuned to her even if they do not yet trust each other. Psyche’s emphasis on his “liar’s smile” suggests that she is still fearful and anxious, indicating that Eros will have to work hard to earn her trust.

“She blinks those big hazel eyes at me. ‘I’m sorry, I must have misheard you. I thought you just suggested sex with you as exposure therapy.’ 

‘I did.’ 

‘You really have a high opinion of yourself, don’t you?’”

Eros’s focus on Psyche’s eyes confirms his ongoing attraction and sexual interest in her. Meanwhile, Psyche freely teases Eros about his ego and arrogance, implying that he is overestimating the importance of his sexual prowess. Ironically, this bantering dynamic does not indicate a divide between the two; instead, it is clear that they are intellectual equals and that Psyche already enjoys challenging Eros’s assumptions that he is in full control of their marriage of convenience.

“When he finally lifts his head and stares down at me with eyes gone dark from desire, he looks almost as shocked as I feel. The expression shifts away almost instantly, replaced by fierce determination. He eases back slowly enough that I have to bite my bottom lip to remind myself that this is fake, that I most certainly cannot reach for him and drag him on top of me to finish what that kiss started.”

Psyche is minutely aware of Eros’s every reaction, including his effort to hide that he is as overcome as she is. Psyche is honest with herself about her fantasies, acknowledging that although her imagination has no doubts, her rational side does. The conflict between her imagination and her practical side reinforces her difficulty with balancing the unanticipated depth of her attraction with the practical need to maintain the public fiction of romance with Eros. The tension in this scene foreshadows the fact that their feelings will eventually match their physical chemistry.

“‘That’s ridiculous. Why wouldn’t they have a wide range of sizes to fit all their customers? You’re hardly the only woman who’s…’ I wave my hand at her. 

‘Fat.’ 

I bristle. ‘I didn’t say that.’ 

‘It’s not an insult. It’s just a word.’ She shrugs again.”

Eros’s tone of angry surprise establishes that he is not merely a relative stranger to Psyche but also a thin person who has not seriously grappled with the practical implications of fatphobia. His irritation on her behalf is in stark contrast to his mother’s tendency to belittle her, hinting at the depth of his growing regard and his romantic attraction to her. Psyche’s relative nonchalance and deliberate reclamation of the term “fat” establish that she is confident in herself despite the social stigma attached to her body type.

“There is no reason for some undefined barbed emotion to lash through me at the photographic evidence of her happy childhood. It certainly shouldn’t be made worse by the fact that Demeter has had photos prominently displayed, if in a part of the penthouse where only family would spend time.”

Eros’s choice to call emotions “barbed” reinforces the idea that in his family’s world, all emotions are weapons: sources of damage and threat rather than indicators of insight. Eros remains an acute observer, but in this moment, he is overcome by the proof that not all family dynamics are as toxic as his own. This scene emphasizes the contrast between his upbringing and Pysche’s, and this becomes a central issue in their developing romance.

“I usually keep to a subtler neutral with pops of brightness. A look that doesn’t scream for attention but also isn’t hiding. No one can look at me in this dress and see anything other than a statement. Choke on that, Aphrodite.”

Psyche’s assessment of her wedding gown’s departure from her usual look implies that being with Eros has already changed her. Her earlier aesthetic was unashamed yet unobtrusive, but now she is willing to let her clothing speak loudly, as though Eros has bolstered her self-confidence. Her cutting reference to Aphrodite broadcasts the depth of Psyche’s anger about her predicament, and she therefore expresses her unwillingness to let her adversary make her feel ashamed or frightened.

“‘More than the others, you are the apple that doesn’t fall far from my tree. I trust that you have a reason for doing this.’ She shoots me a severe look. ‘You should have told me. We could have negotiated for more favorable terms.’ Despite everything, I huff out a laugh.”

Demeter’s metaphor in this passage evokes her role as the goddess of agriculture, and it is clear that she likens her daughters to fruit that she has cultivated and nurtured. The sense of care in the metaphor is accompanied by Demeter’s steely resolve as she gently castigates Psyche for giving up political advantages in her marriage negotiations. Psyche’s amusement establishes that she respects her mother’s strategic mind and is not harmed by it, and this exchange marks the difference between Psyche’s relationship with Demeter and Eros’s relationship with Aphrodite.

“He saw me naked just a few hours ago, but I can’t help the stab of insecurity I feel. Corsets might look like a dream, but they leave press marks across the skin of my stomach. It’s hardly the sexy image I’d choose for tonight. Eros meets my gaze in the mirror. The naked hunger on his face puts what few doubts I have aside. This man has no reason to lie to me, not about this.”

In this passage, Psyche’s vulnerability establishes that her confidence is not limitless and that cultivated public images carry private costs, like the press marks of a corset or the emotional weight of a marriage of convenience. However, the mirror paradoxically dispels her anxieties by putting Eros’s regard on display for her and drawing her gaze away from her perceived inadequacies. Psyche therefore regains the sense that she can trust his body, if not his intensions, and the intimate moment reveals the growing connection between them.

“It’s foolish in the extreme to let myself believe that. Psyche might like the way I fuck, but she doesn’t like me. She doesn’t hate me, though. She’s too good a person to let me touch her like this if she truly hated me. That’s a tiny ledge to stand on and wish for more, but I’ve been in more impossible situations and come out on top.”

Eros’s deliberately crude language betrays both his self-contempt and his efforts to rein in his emotions. He insists that Psyche is only drawn to his body, not to his personality. He likens his hope to a “tiny ledge”—as if a life without Psyche would lead him off a cliff into the unknown. He assures himself he can still “come out on top,” and this metaphor suggests that he still sees life as a competition to win.

“Eros nods at where my hands are fisting the sheets, and a strange little smile pulls at his lips. ‘You know you want them in my hair.’ I do. I really, really do. Which is precisely why I shouldn’t, why I should try to keep some part of me withdrawn. This isn’t a battle I’m going to win, though.”

The banter in this moment indicates that Eros is amused and charmed by what he reads in Psyche’s body language. This external scenario stands in stark contrast to her inner monologue, which proves to be a self-protective effort to resist her own desire. She likens their relationship to a “battle” that she has already lost, and her contemplations indicate that their sexual connection gives Eros a measure of power over her.

“‘Gods, Eros. You can’t kiss me like that in public. You’re going to get us in trouble.’ True? Not true? I can’t be sure. Not when I’m half a second from dragging her into the greenhouse and finding a private corner to make her come a time or three.”

Eros’s flippant use of rhetorical questions highlights his emotional disorientation and relative disregard for the long-term consequences of his current arousal. Psyche’s casual flirtation, in keeping with their ruse, only enhances his attraction to her, indicating that he is becoming less rational and calculating in her presence. At the same time, he is clearly seeking to avoid his deeper emotions by focusing on sex, as the prospect of untangling the reality of his relationship with Psyche requires a level of vulnerability that he is not yet equipped to embrace.

“Her hazel eyes go hard. ‘I won’t allow that to happen. You deserve better than to be her weapon, and the people in this city deserve better than to walk on eggshells to avoid pissing Aphrodite off. We’ll find a way to stop her. Together.’”

This scene highlights Psyche’s sense of power and justice as she refuses to let Eros continue to dehumanize himself as Aphrodite does. She clearly sees him as one of his mother’s victims, and her reaction stresses the stark reality that Aphrodite is toxic to the public. Psyche, like her mother, is concerned with the polity as a whole, in addition to her own personal interests.

“I turn us to face the mirror next to the front door. Eros is trying to shut down his expression, but he still looks pained as I take a deep breath. ‘I see someone loyal.’ His hand spasms in mine. 

‘Psyche—’ 

‘I’m not finished.’ I turn us one mirror to the right.”

Psyche uses mirrors to force Eros to face her vision of him, a process that he clearly finds excruciating because he assumes that she still sees him as an adversary. Eros’s body reacts before he can speak, as if his very being rejects the prospect of being cared for or loved. However, Psyche is relentless in her compassion, insisting that he face himself through her eyes, and the entire scene stands as a grand gesture of her love.

“Except that’s what Psyche is offering, in her way. Perhaps not a shield; a better description of what she’s offering me is a safe place to land. Both ideas are as foreign to me as sprouting wings from my back and taking flight.”

In this scene, Eros grapples for a metaphor that will allow him to come to terms with Psyche’s role in his life, and his struggle shows that he is unused to having allies or support. He realizes that she is his “safe place,” a phrase that establishes that she has become his home. The closing image of the impossibility of “sprouting wings” and “taking flight” also stands as an oblique reference to the fact that the original Greek figure of Eros is synonymous with his Roman counterpart, Cupid, who is commonly depicted as a cherub with wings and associated with the emotion of love. In Robert’s version, Psyche gives Eros an almost supernatural feeling of security simply by loving him.

“I press my hand to the center of his chest. ‘And you love her like a sister. That love counts. One could argue it counts even more than romantic love because there isn’t sex in the mix, muddying things up.’”

Psyche’s gesture is a tangible effort to remind Eros that he does have feelings and a heart, for all his protestations to the contrary. Her insistence that platonic love “counts” is another way of reminding Eros that he does have chosen family, no matter what his future with his mother might hold. Psyche clearly values Eros’s loyalty to others, and she makes it a point to indicate that her own love for him is not possessive like his mother’s is.

“Barely long enough for me to get there with time to spare. I’m already moving to the door and yanking on my coat. ‘Okay. Thank you, Aphrodite.’ I can hear the evil smile in her voice. ‘Not a problem, dear. Mother knows best, after all.’”

Psyche focuses on the practical as she prepares to meet with Aphrodite, and her brisk tone in this passage—as well as her understanding of Aphrodite’s “evil smile”—indicates that her performance for Aphrodite is a false front to conceal her broader strategy. In this exchange, Aphrodite betrays her own sense of smug triumph, which Psyche senses intuitively. Aphrodite’s condescending insistence that “mother knows best” proves that she regards all her adversaries as less capable than she is.

“‘One hundred thousand viewers and counting. Before the end of the day, all of Olympus will have heard you confess to trying to kill me.’ Psyche’s trembling smile goes sharp. ‘Sharks aren’t the only predators in the ocean, Aphrodite.’”

As Eros observes the evidence of Psyche’s triumph on her face, his astuteness shows his acceptance of the fact that social reach is its own kind of weapon. Psyche herself acknowledges her status as a “predator” who has earned the right to fight for herself. Her choice to make a spectacle is the ultimate proof that loving Eros has made her even more confident, as she does not doubt her victory or her power.

“‘Take me in front of every mirror in this house, Husband. Let’s put them to good use.’ He pulls me down into a devastating kiss. ‘That will take years, Wife.’ ‘Good.’”

Psyche’s words are playful and flirtatious, and her willingness to revel in the endless mirrors shows her secure confidence in her body. Psyche and Eros also refer to each other explicitly as spouses, embracing the fact that their marriage of convenience has become a true and wanted partnership. Their future ahead is one of romance, and their only remaining strategy is an indulgence in mutual passion.