Emotional Intelligence 2.0

Bradberry and Greaves shift from why EQ matters to what it looks like in daily behavior. They sort EQ into two areas. Personal competence covers how one handles oneself: self-awareness (noticing feelings and patterns in the moment) and self-management (choosing steady, useful actions when those feelings show up). Social competence covers how one works with others: social awareness (picking up what people feel and need) and relationship management (keeping trust, communicating clearly, and handling friction before it grows).

The chapter backs each skill with short, real workplace snapshots. For self-awareness, they report a strong link to performance: 83% of people high in self-awareness are top performers, while only 2% of bottom performers score high. Those good at self-management show calm, patient conduct in hard meetings and the ability to pause before reacting; those with weaker abilities show stress leaking into tone, quick outbursts, and team anxiety. To gauge one’s social awareness, the chapter recommends pausing in the middle of a conversation to watch tone, posture, and mood shifts and verifying one’s understanding by stating it and inviting confirmation (for example, “It sounds like you’re concerned about…Is that right?”). Relationship management pulls the first three skills together and matters most under pressure; the authors note that over 70% of people struggle with stress, which is why conflicts tend to either fester or blow up without these habits.