Etched In Sand: A True Story of Five Siblings Who Survived an Unspeakable Childhood on Long Island

Gather initial thoughts and broad opinions about the book.

1. Which chapter or moment in the book was the most emotionally impactful for you and why?

2. Why do you think Calcaterra chose to begin and end her memoir with Hurricane Sandy? What message is being communicated?

3. Did you root for Regina along her journey of self-discovery? When did you feel most connected to her?

Encourage readers to connect the book’s themes and characters with their personal experiences.

1. Regina draws strength and support from her siblings. Who are the people in your life who support you in difficult times? 

2. When has a difficult experience led you to develop a sense of purpose? What did you learn from your experience, and how did you apply it? 

3. How did Regina use sublimation (turning a negative experience into something positive) to regain control of her own life and dignity? Have you ever turned a negative experience into something positive?

4. Do you have any experiences to share regarding the flaws in various governmental systems, such as foster care, health care, education, law?

Examine the book’s relevance to societal issues, historical events, or cultural themes.

1. How does the book depict the long-term impacts on people who age out of foster care with no safety net? What can be done to alleviate this pressing issue?

2. How do stories like Regina’s give voice to those who are often silenced? Why is it important to shed light on success stories of people who have difficult childhoods?

3. While Long Island was increasingly becoming populated by the wealthy, people like Regina and her family continued to navigate extreme poverty. How does the book dramatize the effects of this inequality?

Dive into the book’s structure, characters, themes, and symbolism.

1. What techniques does Calcaterra use to characterize herself and her siblings? How does she show the differences in their personalities? How do they clash with and complement each other?

2. Why do you think Calcaterra chose to open with a moment in the present day before moving back in time to describe her childhood? How did this opening affect your reading experience? 

3. Why did Regina carry the Jesus figurines with her despite not knowing where they came from? What do they symbolize for her? Is this different from what they symbolize for the reader? 

4. Explain the symbolism of the names written in the sand. How does the meaning of this symbol change over the course of the memoir? 

5. How does Regina’s perspective (particularly when she was young) affect the clarity of your understanding? How does the memoir represent the ambiguity and uncertainty of early childhood memories?

Encourage imaginative and creative connections to the book.

1. Do you have any mementos from your childhood that still have meaning for you? What are they, and how has their meaning changed over the course of your life?

2. Imagine that you are Regina’s friend or teacher during her childhood. Write a letter in which you attempt to offer her some meaningful support, either practical or emotional.

2. Write a short poem detailing the aspect of the memoir that most resonated with you.

4. Imagine you are the director of a film or television adaptation of Etched in Sand. Who would you cast to play Regina and her siblings? Who would play Cookie? Why?

5. Rewrite a key moment from the memoir from another character’s perspective.