Helmet for My Pillow: From Parris Island to the Pacific

Chapter 7 chronicles three distinct phases of Leckie’s experience in the Pacific: his psychological breakdown on Pavuvu, his recuperation at a naval hospital, and the devastating Battle of Peleliu.

The chapter opens with Leckie and his unit stationed on Pavuvu Island, which served as their rest area between combat operations. Rather than providing genuine respite, Pavuvu became a source of profound demoralization. The island presented terrible living conditions: Marines battled omnipresent mud, rat infestations, contaminated water supplies, and deteriorating equipment. They conquered the mud through backbreaking labor but found the rats and bats unconquerable, creating an environment of futility and frustration.

The most crushing blow came when military leadership announced a rotation system that would allow some Marines to return home. This decision initially sparked hope among veterans who had already served extensive combat tours. However, the selection process excluded any Marine with disciplinary infractions, regardless of their combat record or length of service. Leckie found himself among those barred from consideration due to past minor violations, creating what he describes as a devastating sense of injustice. This arbitrary system divided the unit into those deemed worthy of home leave and those condemned to continue fighting, destroying unit cohesion and morale.

Facing this crushing disappointment and experiencing worsening symptoms of enuresis (bedwetting), Leckie sought medical attention that resulted in his transfer to a naval hospital on Banika Island. His journey to the hospital involved smuggling a Japanese pistol belonging to his friend Rutherford.

The hospital experience exposed Leckie to a different world within the Pacific theater. Banika represented abundance and comfort compared to the combat zones: It featured electric lights, movie theaters, well-fed personnel, and abundant supplies. Leckie was placed in the psychiatric ward, designated P-38, where he encountered genuinely mentally ill patients alongside others seeking refuge from combat stress. When the psychiatrist, Dr. Gentle, expressed surprise that someone of Leckie’s intellectual caliber served as a scout rather than in a more prestigious role, Leckie recognized the dangerous tendency to view combat roles as suitable only for the less intelligent. The hospital stay also demonstrated the arbitrary nature of military medical decisions. Despite finding no cure for Leckie’s condition, doctors eventually returned him to duty with impractical suggestions for accommodation.

Upon returning to Pavuvu, Leckie discovered a dramatically transformed atmosphere. The unit had regained its fighting spirit and sense of purpose, evidenced by improved living conditions, organized recreational activities, and renewed camaraderie among the Marines. During this period, Leckie formed a significant friendship with a replacement Marine called “the Scholar,” bonding over their shared intellectual interests and collections of books. Their tent became an informal gathering place for discussion and debate, providing intellectual stimulation that helped maintain psychological resilience.

The final section chronicles the Battle of Peleliu, which Leckie presents as fundamentally different from previous Pacific engagements. Unlike earlier battles characterized by jungle warfare and surprise encounters, Peleliu featured prepared defensive positions, coordinated artillery fire, and systematic Japanese resistance that inflicted unprecedented casualties on American forces.

The battle began with what appeared to be overwhelming American superiority: massive naval bombardment, air support, and coordinated amphibious assault. However, the Japanese defenders, numbering approximately 10,000, had prepared extensive underground fortifications that rendered conventional bombardment ineffective. From the moment of landing, American forces faced withering fire from concealed positions, immediately dispelling any illusions about an easy victory.

The Japanese responded with accurate mortar and artillery fire that began inflicting heavy casualties before the Marines even reached the beach, which quickly became littered with destroyed vehicles and wounded men. Leckie’s unit advanced across an exposed airfield under constant fire from concealed machine gun positions and artillery, with Marines falling steadily as they moved toward their objective of Bloody Nose Ridge. The extreme heat, contaminated water supplies, and continuous bombardment created brutal conditions, while Japanese tanks launched counterattacks that were repelled only with heavy fighting. Leckie personally experienced the terror of being targeted by enemy artillery as shells landed closer and closer to his position; he ultimately suffered a complete psychological and physical breakdown that required his evacuation from the battlefield.

Following this breakdown, Leckie was evacuated from Peleliu to a hospital ship, where he gradually recovered his ability to speak and walk over several days. From the ship’s deck, he could observe the ongoing battle on the island and learned of additional casualties among his unit members. His friend Runner, also wounded and evacuated, provided updates on other Marines: Chuckler had sustained a serious thigh wound, while Hoosier had been hit but less severely. Runner also recounted the death of a young replacement from Texas who had already lost two brothers in the war and died expressing his fear for what his death would do to his mother. The battle ultimately resulted in the complete destruction of the Japanese garrison of 10,000 defenders, while Leckie’s regiment suffered catastrophic losses. When the final assault order came, the surviving 28 effective fighters from his original battalion of 1500 men rose from their positions and advanced despite barely being able to walk. These remnants were eventually withdrawn from combat and evacuated to a naval hospital on Manus Island, where Leckie would reunite with other surviving Marines from his original unit.