I Am Not Jessica Chen

I Am Not Jessica Chen is rooted in the “body swap” trope, but Liang puts her own twist on it to serve her narrative. The book is told entirely in the voice of Jenna Chen, the protagonist, who wakes up in her cousin Jessica Chen’s body after she wishes she were Jessica. Despite Jenna clearly having swapped bodies with Jessica, however, there is no sign of a swapped Jessica herself. In fact, throughout the book, the only person’s thoughts and feelings the reader is privy to is Jenna’s, in either body. It is only revealed much later what happened to Jessica during this “swap,” and meanwhile, Liang’s focus is solely on Jenna’s experiences and character arc. She thus adapts the body swap trope in a way that allows the focus to remain on Jenna, downplaying the importance of the lessons that Jessica might need to learn. This adaptation positions Jenna as the clear and single protagonist of the book, with Jessica merely a means to an end in Jenna’s journey.

These opening chapters establish the key theme of Navigating Comparison and Expectation as Jenna wrestles with her disappointment over her Harvard rejection. Jenna believes herself to be perpetually down on her luck, claiming “the universe” rarely ever gives her what she really wants. Jenna is thus presented as someone who lacks a sense of her own agency and self-worth, preferring to blame the “universe” for whatever goes wrong in her life and feeling perpetually dissatisfied with whatever she does have or achieve. This sets up one of the key aspects of her character arc: Jenna will have to learn how to feel comfortable with who she is, thereby becoming more optimistic and grateful for her own life and achievements as a result. 



The root of Jenna’s insecurity is soon revealed to be the constant comparison she experiences between herself and Jessica—something that Jenna’s parents indulge in, and that Jenna ascribes to as well. Upon returning home from dinner, Jenna’s father’s first instinct is to suggest that Jenna try and emulate her cousin better; a dejected Jenna asserts that she has already tried to do so and failed. Jenna therefore struggles with understanding how she can create a sense of identity that is separate from what Jessica achieves or is like, with her constant habit of comparing herself to her cousin making it harder to see who she is in her own right.

Another key theme that emerges in these chapters is The Impact of Success on Personal Relationships. Jessica’s success and Jenna’s comparative failure creates envy and some inauthenticity in Jenna’s feelings and behavior toward her cousin, which subtly reveals one of the disadvantages Jessica struggles with: Her success attracts not only the admiration Jenna sees her receiving, but also resentment that can damage how others relate to her. Jenna’s private negative feelings suggest that there may be others who feel the same way, thus depriving Jessica of more authentic connections based on people truly liking her just for who she is, and not for what she achieves.  

Initially, however, Jenna only notes the positive aspects of the attention Jessica receives. After the swap, Jenna notices a difference in the way that Leela presents herself to “Jessica” versus how she is with Jenna. Jenna’s reflections suggest that the aura of success and achievement that surround Jessica changes how people behave in her presence. This is reiterated by the admiration and awe that Jenna as “Jessica” is overwhelmed by at school, as she finds herself interacting with people who do not notice her at all when she is herself. As Jenna gets to know Jessica’s life better, she will gradually learn that even this kind of excessive admiration is not the unalloyed good she believes it to be.

The body swap also introduces the theme of The Relation Between Appearance and Identity. At this point in the story, Liang is focused on examining the relationship between physical appearance and identity: Jenna as “Jessica” assimilates fairly easily, despite the complete disorientation she feels, because anything strange she does or says will simply be attributed to “Jessica” having an off day. Jessica’s mother is not hugely alarmed by her daughter’s uncharacteristic lateness, and neither is Jenna’s own mother suspicious of “Jessica’s” atypical visit to their house. Jenna herself feels so tied to Jessica’s body already that she basks in the praise she receives for her cousin’s physical appearance. 

The exception, however, is Aaron Cai. Aaron is the only person who notices anything different at all about “Jessica,” and even more significantly, he is also the only person who remembers and is concerned about Jenna’s sudden disappearance. His ability to notice the strangeness of Jenna’s absence hints at the deep emotional connection he has with her, which will be more fully revealed later in the novel. Nevertheless, he becomes the exception that proves the rule, which suggests that physical appearance is inextricably, and often overwhelmingly, tied to how one’s identity is presented and perceived by others.

Some important symbols and motifs are introduced in these early chapters as well: The shooting star; the self-portrait that Jenna paints; and Jessica’s journal entries. The shooting star points to the element of magic Liang employs in the book, and is hinted to be involved in Jenna’s wish coming true. The self-portrait, at this point, is a representation of Jenna’s own self and her troubled relationship with who she is: She throws paint on it that obscures her eyes, thus also obscuring her identity and reflecting her degree of self-loathing. This symbolizes the body swap itself and also works as a motif speaking to the tensions between appearance and reality.