Me, Myself and Us

Brian R. Little presents a framework for understanding human personality that draws on decades of research in personality science. He argues that personality is shaped by three layers: "first natures" (biological dispositions), "second natures" (environmental and cultural influences), and "third natures" (personal commitments and the projects people pursue). Rather than offering formulaic self-help, the book encourages readers to develop a distinctive approach to self-reflection.

Little begins with "personal constructs," a concept from psychologist George Kelly, who proposed that every person functions like a scientist, forming and revising hypotheses about the world. Personal constructs are the bipolar labels people use to interpret experience, such as "good-bad" or "intelligent-unintelligent." These constructs serve as both useful frames and constraining cages. Little illustrates this vulnerability through Gerald, a military cadet whose identity was organized around the construct "in the army-not in the army." When Gerald was discharged, his construct system collapsed and he was hospitalized for acute anxiety. A multi-day executive assessment further demonstrates construct rigidity: A logging executive named Jack Bancroft dismissed a candidate named Derek as a "hippie" based on appearance, and even as Derek impressed every other assessor, Jack's evaluations hardened. Jack's eventual reversal at the final review was not genuine change but "slot-change," a shift from one pole of a dominant construct to the other.

The book then presents the Big Five personality traits: Conscientiousness, Agreeableness, Neuroticism, Openness, and Extraversion. Little contrasts this dimensional model with the popular Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), which lacks comparable reliability. Each Big Five trait has roughly 50 percent genetic heritability and significant consequences for well-being, though these consequences depend on context. Conscientiousness predicts academic achievement, job performance, and longevity, yet a study of Tulsa jazz musicians found that highly conscientious players were rated less effective by peers, since improvisational settings reward flexibility. Agreeableness is valued socially but is one of the weakest predictors of organizational success. Neuroticism, rooted in hypersensitivity of the amygdala (a brain structure involved in threat detection), is the trait most consistently linked to poor well-being. Openness is associated with creativity and aesthetic sensitivity.

Little gives extended attention to extraversion, explaining that extraverts have lower chronic neocortical arousal (baseline brain activation) and seek stimulation, while introverts have higher arousal and avoid overstimulation. He introduces "ambiverts," people with middle-level extraversion scores, citing organizational psychologist Adam Grant's research showing that ambiverts outperform both extremes in sales. He engages with Susan Cain's argument in her book Quiet that American culture discriminates against introverts but cautions that extraversion is only one of five major traits.

A central argument is Little's theory of "free traits." He distinguishes three sources of motivation: biogenic (genetic), sociogenic (cultural norms), and idiogenic (personal projects). People regularly act "out of character" to advance core projects, driven by professionalism and love rather than insincerity. He illustrates through two composite characters: Markus, a biogenic introvert who acts extraverted to succeed as a music producer, and Stephanie, a biogenically disagreeable woman who acts sweet at Thanksgiving as part of her project of becoming a more nurturing parent before moving abroad. However, protracted free trait behavior exacts a toll. Jamie Pennebaker, a researcher on expressive writing and suppression, showed that suppressing important aspects of oneself causes chronic arousal and health problems. Psychologist Dan Wegner's research on thought suppression demonstrates that trying not to think about something makes the thought more persistent. To mitigate these costs, Little proposes "restorative niches," environments where people can recover their biogenic natures, and a "free trait agreement" ensuring access to such spaces.

Little examines self-monitoring, a concept developed by psychologist Mark Snyder. High self-monitors adjust behavior to match situational expectations, while low self-monitors are guided by personal values regardless of context. High self-monitors achieve more occupational success but tend toward noncommitment in relationships and organizations, while low self-monitors have more enduring relationships but may appear rigid. Little argues that extreme versions of either orientation can become pathological.

The book explores locus of control, the belief about whether one's actions or external forces determine outcomes. "Internals" resist unwanted social influence, take fewer health risks, and link aspirations to concrete plans. Little cites the Coleman Report, a landmark study of American education, which found internal locus of control to be the best predictor of academic achievement. He discusses psychologist Walter Mischel's marshmallow studies, in which four-year-olds who could delay gratification later showed stronger academic performance. However, Little complicates the case through researcher Richard Schulz's nursing home study: Residents given control over when visitors came showed improved well-being, but after the study ended and control was removed, this group experienced marked health declines and higher mortality. Control beliefs, Little argues, must be grounded in reality.

In examining personality and health, Little contrasts hardiness with Type A personality. Researcher Salvatore Maddi's longitudinal study of Illinois Bell Telephone employees during massive downsizing found that resilient employees shared three qualities: commitment, control, and challenge. Type A personality shares these characteristics yet is linked to heart disease. Little resolves this paradox by identifying hostility as the core pathological feature: Hardy individuals exercise flexible control and playful engagement, while Type A individuals exercise indiscriminate control and grimly competitive responses. Medical sociologist Aaron Antonovsky's concept of the "sense of coherence," comprising comprehensibility, manageability, and meaningfulness, provides an integrative framework linking personality, environment, and health.

The chapter on creativity draws on the Institute for Personality Assessment and Research (IPAR) studies at UC Berkeley. Creative architects were no more intelligent than conventional peers above an IQ threshold of about 120 and had typically been B students. They were dominant, self-confident, and free from convention but not especially sociable. Little challenges the "myth of the solo hero," arguing that reliable, detail-oriented colleagues are essential to creative accomplishment. He illustrates through Charles Darwin, whose chronic illness shielded him from social demands but whose wife Emma provided the editing and daily support without which his work could not have been completed.

Little explores how environments interact with personality, contrasting architect Christopher Alexander's view that cities provide insufficient human contact with psychologist Stanley Milgram's view that cities generate information overload. Both theorists, Little argues, underestimate individual differences: Alexander's ideal city would suit extraverts but overwhelm introverts.

The concluding chapters center on Personal Projects Analysis (PPA), Little's method for studying personality through what people do. Personal projects range from trivial daily tasks to overriding life aspirations, and people typically report pursuing about 15 at any given time. Efficacy, the belief that one's projects will succeed, is the single strongest positive predictor of well-being, while stress is the strongest negative predictor. The most meaningful projects are often the hardest to manage, creating a meaning-manageability trade-off. Little proposes that the sustainable pursuit of "core projects," those with high personal meaning, is the key to well-being. He offers three strategies for sustaining such pursuit. Adaptive reconstruing involves reframing projects through new lenses, illustrated by a study in which hotel room attendants who were told their cleaning work constituted healthy exercise showed measurable decreases in weight, blood pressure, and body fat. Self-change involves internally generated projects to modify one's own personality; self-determination theory, which distinguishes self-chosen from externally pressured goals, suggests these are more sustainable than externally imposed changes. Context monitoring involves scanning and shaping environments, including the creation of "identity niches," settings that optimally support one's interests and aspirations. Little closes with philosopher Owen Flanagan's metaphor of a final dance between the "I" and the self it observes, framing self-reflection as both reconciliation with the multiple selves one has been and revitalization toward who one might yet become.