Mick Harte Was Here

Park continues to explore The Impact of Grief in the aftermath of Mick’s death. The family’s grief makes the normal routines of their lives feel unmanageable; they are unable to make themselves presentable, or to eat or sleep properly. According to Phoebe, her mother is “a zombie” and her father is “some slob in slipper socks” (47). Her parents’ unkempt appearance is shocking to Phoebe, and heightens the sense that their lives have been completely disrupted.

Often, Phoebe and her parents’ grief plays out in different and contradictory ways. Phoebe yearns to talk about Mick, but this is too painful for her mother—“my mother put her hands over her ears” (41). Phoebe feels “horrible and confused” as she tries to manage mourning alone; she furiously yells at her mother for not listening to her (47). Phoebe is used to her parents being able to help her to manage the unmanageable, but Mick’s death makes them withdraw, leaving Phoebe isolated.

Park acknowledges the importance of relying on one’s friends in times of grief and loss. For example, Phoebe calls Zoe when her parents are unable to support her. Zoe’s reaction reminds Phoebe that: “I could always talk to her [Zoe] after that too. Always. No matter what I was feeling” (48).

In these chapters, Learning to Live With Loss is also an important theme. Initially, Phoebe finds the prospect of healing an insult to Mick’s memory and tragic death. This is illustrated when she hangs up on Zoe when Zoe describes how the grief counselor helped their classmates. For Phoebe, grief feels appropriate—“feeling better sounded almost disloyal” (38). She intentionally remains in a space of emotional devastation by going into Mick’s room—“just to make sure I stayed as depressed and loyal as possible” (38). Phoebe’s reluctance to begin the healing process is evident in this anecdote; she views healing as inappropriate. Committing to healing requires accepting Mick’s death. This is something which Phoebe is not ready to do. 

Later, Phoebe will attempt to come to terms with her loss, illustrated by her decision to reach out to Zoe to talk about her feelings. Zoe helps Phoebe to accept Mick’s absence by encouraging her to conceptualize him as all around her—“if God is everywhere the way they say he is, and Mick is with God, then Mick could be everywhere too” (53). Zoe’s words resonate with Phoebe. It brings immense comfort that Mick might still be able to hear her. Park suggests that people can find a sense of closure from death and learn to live with immense and painful loss through their own spiritual belief systems.

In these chapters, Park further characterizes Mick as humorous and likeable. In particular, Mick’s collection of treasures suggests that he was eccentric and hilarious. His preserved autographs from “Herb Fogg, the weatherman” and “some guy named Tweets who had been dressed in a bird suit at a local pet store opening” are humorous, as these figures are relatively obscure (38).

Mick keeps a cigar wrapped in paper with the message: “It’s a girl” (39). He interpreted this to mean that the cigar was a girl, rather than the cigar being a gift for a parent expecting a daughter. He calls the cigar Helen. This play-on-words emphasizes Mick’s sense of humor, as do the anecdotes from his memorial service, such as of Mick dancing wildly on stage in front of the school after “the music got in his pants” (60). Park positions the reader to like and appreciate Mick through anecdotes which foreground his unique and funny personality. This aims to make the reader feel more affected and saddened by Mick’s death, and to feel sympathetic to Phoebe and her parents.