Mrs. Everything

Content Warning: This section of the guide contains discussion of sexual violence and harassment.

Gather initial thoughts and broad opinions about the book.

1. The novel follows two sisters whose lives take dramatically different paths yet remain intertwined throughout seven decades. Have you read other multi-generational family sagas, like Hala Alyan’s Salt Houses, that explore how family bonds evolve over time?

2. Weiner’s novel explores themes of women struggling between personal desires and societal or family demands, which appear frequently in women’s fiction from classics like Little Women to contemporary works. What resonated most with you about Weiner’s approach?

3. Jo’s three daughters each represent different approaches to balancing career ambitions with traditional expectations of motherhood. Which daughter’s choices surprised you most, and why do you think Weiner included all three perspectives on modern womanhood?

Encourage readers to connect the book’s themes and characters with their personal experiences.

1. Jo sacrifices her dreams and authentic self multiple times throughout the story to help others or conform to expectations. How do you navigate moments in your own life when you face similar choices between authenticity and security or approval?

2. Bethie transforms from the “perfect” traditional daughter to a free-spirited hippie and eventually a successful businesswoman. Her journey involves dramatic shifts in identity that often surprise even herself. What moments in your life have marked significant shifts in how you see yourself or how others perceive you?

3. The relationship between Jo and Sarah is strained by their fundamental differences in values and life choices. How do you navigate relationships with family members whose values or lifestyle choices differ significantly from your own?

4. Sarah shows love through actions like working multiple jobs and providing for her daughters rather than through verbal affirmations. Do you recognize different ways people in your family express love that might not match your preferred love language?

5. Jo’s fitness classes become a source of both personal fulfillment and financial independence after years of feeling trapped. Have you experienced moments when a hobby or passion unexpectedly opened new doors in your life?

Examine the book’s relevance to societal issues, historical events, or cultural themes.

1. Weiner traces women’s changing roles from the 1950s expectation of housewifery through the feminist movements to present-day career opportunities. This sweeping timeline allows readers to see both progress and persistent challenges. Which aspects of this evolution feel most significant when you consider the women in your life across different generations?

2. The novel presents Jo’s struggle with her lesbian identity and Bethie’s interracial marriage as challenges to the societal norms of their period. How do these storylines reflect broader patterns of social acceptance and resistance to change that continue today?

3. Uncle Mel’s abuse of Bethie and Lester’s harassment in the publishing world connect to contemporary conversations about sexual misconduct and abuses of power. These storylines span decades yet feel current in the post-MeToo era. How do these incidents illuminate ongoing issues about believing victims and institutional protection of perpetrators?

4. Throughout the novel, both sisters struggle with the expectations placed on women in their respective eras. From the 1950s ideal of domesticity to today’s pressure to have it all, these expectations continue to evolve. How do you see similar pressures affecting your generation’s choices about career, family, and personal fulfillment?

Dive into the book’s structure, characters, themes, and symbolism.

1. The Jell-O dessert appears at key family gatherings, creating moments of both tradition and conflict. How do these seemingly small domestic details reveal larger family dynamics throughout the story?

2. Weiner alternates between Jo’s and Bethie’s perspectives across different decades. In what ways does this narrative structure deepen your understanding of their individual journeys and their evolving relationship?

3. Fashion and clothing choices serve as markers of identity and conformity throughout the decades covered in the novel. How do the sisters’ evolving styles reflect their internal transformations and changing expectations for women?

4. Both sisters experience sexual trauma, but their responses and paths to healing differ significantly. Bethie finds healing through the sisterhood of the women’s commune, while Jo channels her energy into activism and later into protecting her daughters. What do their different journeys suggest about the various ways people process and overcome trauma?

5. The family home on Alhambra Street serves as an anchor point throughout the novel’s seven-decade span. In your view, what does this enduring setting represent about memory, identity, and belonging for the Kaufman family?

Encourage imaginative and creative connections to the book.

1. Design a memory box for either Jo or Bethie to capture the most significant moments of their seven-decade journey. Which five objects would you include, and what turning points would each represent?

2. The novel ends in 2022 with Lila as a devoted mother, but Weiner leaves many questions about the next generation unanswered. Write an epilogue set in 2040. What challenges and opportunities do you think Lila’s son Tim might face as he comes of age?

3. Suppose you could step into the story and offer advice to either Jo or Bethie at any point in their lives. Which moment would you choose, and what guidance would you provide to help them navigate their crossroads?

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