my dream about being white

Clifton puts specific attention on “hair” (Line 4), “lips” (Line 8), and the “behind” (Line 9). These are parts of the body that distinguish African Americans from European Americans and also women from men. They are doubly significant to the speaker as an African American woman, and they become doubly open for judgment by viewers.

Those who endure racism can internalize that judgment, feeling that their bodies are less desirable. However, as the saying goes, “beauty is in the eye of the beholder.” In this poem, Clifton plays with perspective. She asks the question, “what do I think about ‘white me?’” Significantly, she never introduces any other characters or points of view. She does not show “white me” (Line 10) in a social context and never remarks on what anyone else thinks about this white version of herself. This is a poem about interrogating one’s own relationship to one’s body. It is appropriate that this happens in the dream world, which is arguably the most private place a person has, the space of their imagination. Still, even in a dream world, a person carries with them their internalized prejudices and judgments. The speaker may be suggesting that even a dream of being white reflects an unconscious desire; alternatively, the desire to be white is no more necessary or serious than what a person would want in a dream. Like the superficiality of the body and its appearance, a dream is ultimately an illusion that speaks to fantasy rather than truth.

The way the speaker describes her “white me” (Line 10) and implies her “Black” self by comparison shows a conflicted and complicated attitude toward ideals of white beauty and Black beauty. The lines “perfect / line of a nose” (Lines 6-7) suggest that the speaker has internalized the aesthetic preference for typical white features. She therefore judges her white self’s “line of a nose” (Line 7) as “perfect” (Line 6). At the same time, she subtly undercuts that judgment, and, underlying her seeming praise of white beauty, there is detectable sarcasm. She describes the hair of the white woman as a “flutter of / fall leaves” (Lines 4-5). This could suggest hair of multiple colors—since the color of fall leaves are yellow, red, and brown—as opposed to her own black hair color. The image suggests the beauty and effortless grace of falling leaves, yet falling leaves are a little cliché, crumbling, and most importantly, dead. Falling leaves are the end of a life cycle that turns living plants into refuse.

The implication is that the non-white version of her body is stronger, bolder, and more fully in blossom by contrast. She also subtly undercuts the white standard of beauty when she suggests that the white version of herself has “no lips” (Line 8) and “no behind” (Line 9). Even by typical white standards, to be missing lips and behind would be considered unattractive. However, the speaker does not mean this literally. It is a figurative way to say that she does not have lips or a behind distinct from those of white women.

On the surface, the speaker could be implying that having “no lips” (Line 8) and “no behind” (Line 9) are positive attributes. She need not feel self-conscious about the size of her behind and lips, and she may be suggesting that this white body she sees in the dream is easier to manage, both physically and in terms of having access to greater social acceptance and freedom. At the same time, to have “no behind” (Line 8) and “no lips” (Line 8) would also suggest a lack of feminine qualities associated with sensuality and sexuality. The speaker’s appraisal of her white body is conflicted, thus exposing the internal conflicts people feel when their society denigrates their forms.