My Next Breath: A Memoir

My Next Breath: A Memoir (2025) is a memoir by Jeremy Renner recounting a life-altering snowplow accident on New Year’s Day 2023. Renner chronicles his near-fatal accident, the extensive medical treatment that followed, and his methodical approach to physical and psychological rehabilitation. The memoir explores themes of The Importance of Information, Mastering Fear and Taking Action, and The Centrality of Love and Family, presenting recovery not as a return to normalcy but as an opportunity for growth and transformation.

Renner is best known for his roles as Hawkeye in the Marvel Cinematic Universe and his Academy Award-nominated performances in The Hurt Locker and The Town. The memoir falls within the celebrity autobiography subgenre, but is marked by its close examination of physical trauma, psychological resilience, and the intersection of fame with human vulnerability

This study guide uses the 2025 eBook edition published by Flatiron Books.

Content Warning: The source material and guide feature depictions of near-death experiences and graphic descriptions of serious injury.

Summary

On New Year’s Day 2023, Jeremy Renner nearly died in a catastrophic snowcat accident at his Lake Tahoe property. The 14,000-pound snow removal machine began sliding on ice toward his 27-year-old nephew Alex, who was trapped against a Ford Raptor truck. In a split-second decision driven by pure love and protective instinct, Renner attempted to leap back into the snowcat’s cab to hit the emergency stop button. His feet lost their grip on the spinning tracks, catapulting him forward and causing him to strike the ice head-first. The massive machine then rolled over his body with its six wheels and 76 steel track ridges, crushing him over approximately five seconds.

The accident resulted in devastating injuries: 38 broken bones, a collapsed lung, liver damage, major head lacerations, hearing damage, and six quarts of blood loss. Renner’s skull split, his left eye was displaced from its socket, and his ribcage was so severely damaged that he lost the ability to breathe naturally. For 45 minutes on the ice, he had to manually control every breath while his nephew Alex held his arm in position and neighbors provided emergency care until paramedics arrived.

Renner’s survival was made possible by seemingly unrelated childhood experiences that provided him with crucial mental tools. When he was 12 or 13, his mother brought him to Lamaze breathing classes at the YMCA while she was pregnant with his sister. This experience taught him controlled breathing techniques for managing pain—knowledge that became life-saving when he had to manually control his breathing for nearly an hour while crushed and bleeding on the ice.

Growing up as a latchkey child after his parents’ divorce, Renner developed self-sufficiency and learned that information was his primary defense against fear and anxiety. In his 20s, he undertook a systematic decade-long project to conquer his fears by identifying specific anxieties and forcing himself to confront each one daily until it no longer controlled him. This process of fear-conquering developed what he calls “clarity of intention” (70)—the ability to focus intensely on specific goals without allowing fear to dictate decisions.

During the accident, Renner’s heart rate dropped to 18 beats per minute, essentially indicating clinical death. During this period, he describes entering a realm of pure energy with streams of light resembling car taillights in time-lapse photography. He felt connected to everything simultaneously in a timeless existence where past, present, and future merged, bringing him profound peace rather than fear. This experience convinced him that death represents a return to pure love and connection rather than an ending.

Renner’s hospital stay was marked by his determination to control his own recovery process. He became what he describes as “the worst patient ever,” repeatedly attempting to escape from both the Reno hospital and, later, Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles. His difficult behavior stemmed from his belief that hospitals were places to get fixed rather than to heal, and the constant interruptions from medical staff prevented him from getting the sleep necessary for recovery.

Renner’s recovery philosophy centered on the recognition that his trauma had affected his entire family, not just himself. When he reunited with his 10-year-old daughter, Ava, 12 days after the accident, he understood that his recovery needed to be collective rather than individual. He developed the philosophy of “milestones over tombstones” (163), committing to celebrate every achievement rather than dwelling on limitations.

His approach to pain management involved treating his body as a separate, personified entity, engaging in direct conversations with his injured leg and explaining that titanium had replaced his bones so pain signals were no longer necessary. This technique allowed him to reframe pain as dismissible nerve signals. He also rejected traditional medication tapering, stopping all opioids and anti-anxiety medications abruptly rather than gradually, enduring 36 hours of withdrawal that included uncontrollable crying and extreme sensitivity.

The accident fundamentally transformed Renner’s relationship with fame and his life priorities. Previously, celebrity interactions felt invasive and anxiety-provoking, but after the accident, encounters became characterized by compassion and respect. This shift allowed him to use his fame for meaningful purposes rather than serving as mere entertainment. The most profound change was the elimination of what Renner calls “white noise”—the extraneous distractions and meaningless decisions that had previously cluttered his life. This newfound clarity enabled decisions based purely on his core values of health and family connection. Minor concerns about career moves and industry expectations became irrelevant, allowing him to focus exclusively on what truly mattered.

The most significant manifestation of Renner’s transformation was the establishment of Camp Rennervation in summer 2024 at Lake Tahoe. He and his support network created a week-long experience for 110 foster children, providing them with personalized luggage, activities, and a sense of community and belonging. His celebrity status, which he previously disliked, became what he calls a “superpower” for positive impact, inspiring donations from people across the country who found meaning in his recovery story.

Renner’s physical recovery exceeded medical predictions—he was jogging in his driveway by Thanksgiving despite doctors initially saying he would never walk normally or run again. However, when he returned to filming Mayor of Kingstown in early 2024, he discovered the ongoing challenges of his condition, including a week-long hospitalization due to exhaustion from the demanding schedule and harsh weather conditions.

Renner concludes that his near-death experience redirected him toward his true life purpose as a father and community contributor. The accident heightened his awareness of life’s fragility, leading to deeper appreciation for everyday experiences and more intentional expressions of gratitude. He frames his experience as transformative rather than purely destructive, emphasizing how it reinforced the paramount importance of family relationships and personal connections. The perspective gained from his survival has given him a renewed understanding that he will never have another truly “bad day” because of what he has overcome.