Nesting

On an April afternoon in 2018, Ciara, a 36-year-old mother of two, drives her family to Skerries beach near Dublin. Her husband Ryan, a civil servant, insists on taking four-year-old Sophie and two-year-old Ella swimming in the freezing Irish Sea despite the children's protests. When Ciara brings the shivering girls back to shore, Ryan sinks into a punishing silence that lasts the rest of the day. On the surface, Ciara has everything she once wanted: a home in Glasnevin, two daughters, a loyal husband. Beneath it, she feels a "gathering weight in her chest, like the feeling before thunder" (6).

That night, Ryan confronts Ciara about money he gave her for new wetsuits that she secretly stashed in the nappy bag as part of a hidden escape fund. He calls her a "lying bitch," hurls his mug into the sink, and slams the kitchen door so violently a lamp shatters. Later, he forces himself on her while she sleeps. The next morning, Ciara reaches for their passports, her first concrete act toward leaving, but is interrupted by Sophie.

Ciara takes a pregnancy test at a shopping center; it is positive. She calls her older sister Sinéad, a pediatric nurse in Sheffield, England, where the sisters grew up. Their mother Rhona raised them alone after their father left. That afternoon, Ryan gropes Ciara in the garden in front of the children, mocking her discomfort. Something snaps. While he showers, she gathers the girls, grabs their passports and hidden cash, and drives away.

She books a bed-and-breakfast in Phibsborough. Overnight, doubt floods her, but she forces herself to remember Ryan's violence and books flights to Manchester. At Dublin Airport, they are stopped: Ryan has contacted the Gardaí, the Irish police, and placed a hold on the children's passports. He meets Ciara at a café in the Phoenix Park, alternating between tender pleas and contempt. When she asks for a separation, he dismisses her as "crazy."

With no accommodation available, Ciara drives into the Wicklow Mountains, where they sleep in the car. The next morning, she walks to the Central Placement Service on Parkgate Street, the city's emergency housing office, and is given a room at the Hotel Eden on Custom House Quay. Room 124 is small and governed by rigid rules: Residents must check in by 8 p.m., use the back staircase, and stay out of common areas.

Her neighbor Cathy, a single mother of three whose landlord sold their home, becomes Ciara's closest ally. A grueling routine takes shape: driving the girls to playschool, doing laundry at a launderette, and phoning the Homeless Executive, the agency that manages emergency accommodation, fortnightly to confirm their room. Sinéad sends money, and cousin Louise visits from Belfast with cash and suggests Ciara look for English-language teaching work.

Ryan's campaign to win Ciara back intensifies. He presents her with rescued crow chicks, appealing to her love of birds. At an animal rescue center, a worker explains that nestlings removed from their nests become imprinted on human caregivers. One chick, later named Chase, survives under Ryan's care. Cathy introduces Ciara to Alex, who left a physically abusive husband and warns that abusive partners weaponize custody: "These fuckers always use the kids" (126).

Ciara lands a job at a university English-language school. Standing before her first class, she feels a "tingling feeling, like blood returning to a limb" (138). On visitation days, however, Ryan grows hostile, once luring her into his car and berating her. At her 12-week pregnancy scan, a nurse asks if she is afraid of her partner. Ciara says no, then silently begs the nurse to ask again. That evening, she removes her wedding ring and tells Ryan it is over. He serves her with a court summons, claiming her hotel accommodation is unsuitable.

A solicitor named Grace O'Reilly takes Ciara's case at a free legal aid clinic, warning that her housing situation is a serious vulnerability. Ciara also discovers that she could have been teaching in Irish primary schools all along: Ryan told her it was impossible because she did not speak Irish, but teachers are given three years to learn. A Brazilian housekeeping worker at the hotel named Diego, who is studying for English-language exams, becomes another source of support through private tutoring sessions.

In November, Ciara collapses during a class and is rushed to the Rotunda Hospital, where she delivers a boy she names Noah by emergency cesarean. Ryan collects Sophie and Ella from playschool. From her hospital bed, Ciara barely speaks to the girls before he hangs up. Cathy secretly signs in at the hotel each night to prevent Room 124 from being reassigned.

At the January court hearing, the judge grants Ciara primary custody, orders Ryan to pay maintenance, and awards him regular access. Grace warns that Ryan is likely to appeal and urges Ciara to find stable housing. Diego's friend Stefan, an IT specialist, discovers spyware on Ciara's phone that Ryan installed through a "birthday gift," sharing her location and messages. Ryan knew everything.

Ciara views dozens of rental properties but is always outbid or rejected. A sympathetic housing-office worker named Lorraine advises her that most landlords refuse Housing Assistance Payment (HAP). Then Oliver, a Scottish circus performer she meets at a toddler play center, offers her his rental house in Clonee as he moves abroad.

In March 2019, Ciara moves in, filling the house with bright furnishings and her children's artwork. But Ryan claims he has lost his housing and asks to stay on her sofa. Afraid of the consequences, she agrees. He escalates, demanding they resume their marriage and cornering her in the kitchen with his hands on her neck. Ciara takes the children to the Anna Livia refuge, where a worker named Saoirse helps her apply for an emergency barring order, a court measure temporarily removing an abuser from the home. In therapy, a counselor named Maeve helps Ciara speak for the first time about Ryan coercing her sexually. Maeve names it plainly: "If you weren't married, that would be considered rape" (330).

With the barring order in place, Diego invites Ciara and the children to a holiday cabin in County Mayo, where she experiences sustained peace for the first time in years. Diego tells her he has been accepted to a master's program in New York. Their relationship deepens gently, marked by tenderness rather than dramatic gestures.

After the barring order expires, Ryan collects all three children for a visitation day and does not return them. Ciara drives to their old house and finds Sophie and Ella alone; Ryan has taken Noah. After 24 hours, she finds Ryan at Whitefriar Street Church, holding Noah during evening Mass. She strides down the aisle and lifts her baby from his arms. Noah is limp and unresponsive. Ciara calls for an ambulance until she feels him wake.

At a subsequent hearing, the judge grants Ciara permission to leave the country and strictly limits Ryan's access. By summer 2019, she has secured a primary teaching position and her HAP payment has come through. Chase the crow, abandoned by Ryan at the rescue center, has been nursed back to health in Ciara's garden. One morning, she cuts the rope from the bird's feet and watches her fly. Though Rhona urges her to move to Sheffield, Ciara decides to stay: "She doesn't want her kids growing up with a homesick mother, thinking home is somewhere else. Home is right here" (378).

The novel ends on a summer morning. Sophie asks for pancakes. Ella hopscotches on the patio. Above the treetops, a swift soars and dives, and from the pines the dawn chorus rises, which Rhona always said was birds telling each other they had survived the night.