Out of the Woods

In the present, Sarah is now an adult and finds herself praying desperately, as her mother taught her that reaching out to God was only for true emergencies. Her fundraiser for ALS research, in honor of her mother, is far below her financial goal. Win tries to comfort her and suggests that Caleb could give the closing speech. 

Sarah refuses and castigates herself: “[W]hat a waste of time, what a waste of money. What a waste” (9). She is especially distressed because while her mother was a single parent who raised her alone, she has accomplished much less in her life despite having more resources. Sarah envies Win because of her recent happy marriage to Bo Durand and their plans to open an inclusive outdoor recreation camp for children with disabilities. 

As she and Win approach the ballroom, Sarah sees a photo of her mother from her wedding and remembers the final stages of her illness. Near the stage, she sees the lead researcher, Dr. Torres, holding a large check. She is dismayed rather than encouraged, certain that Caleb has used their personal funds to make the event appear more successful.

In the past, Sarah’s mother Marcie helps her alter her dress for an upcoming dance. June, her mother’s best friend, compliments her figure and appearance. Marcie teases Sarah because she has yet to meet Caleb.

On the night of the dance, Caleb arrives for their date. Sarah is nervous to show him her modest apartment, knowing his family is wealthy. He kisses her in reassurance. When Marcie interrupts them, he greets her warmly, charming her.

In the present, Sarah watched Caleb, remembering their many years together and the ways she has relied on him. She finds this more irritating than comforting, thinking, “[A]nd shit, if the damsel in distress routine isn’t getting old” (21). Sarah reaches the stage and struggles to deliver her prepared remarks about Marcie, feeling as though she has no right to pay tribute, but ultimately finishes her speech and toasts her mother.

Later, Sarah angrily takes Caleb aside, asking if he wrote the check. He admits to it, surprised that she is angry. Sarah retreats to the catering area, where Caleb eventually finds her, and they begin arguing. Sarah says that she wanted the success of the event to depend on her. Caleb points out that without his coworkers the guest list would be minimal, and Sarah is stung. She retorts that his wealthy parents have failed to attend, knowing that the reminder of their emotional distance will hurt him. 

She feels particularly insecure about the event’s cost, knowing that his parents have always looked down on her modest background and lack of a notable career. Finally, Sarah asks if sh has achieved anything in her life to celebrate, since tonight’s event has clearly failed. She breaks down and cries when Caleb does not answere.

Win arrives for her weekly television night with Sarah. She notices immediately that Sarah and Caleb are still not speaking. Win is stunned when Sarah suggests perhaps it is time for her and Caleb to consider divorce, saying that couples who marry young often do. She admits that her feelings stem from her belief she has achieved too little with her life, especially in comparison with her mother. Caleb’s inability to name her accomplishments compounded this pain. Sarah wonders if “maybe he’s seeing what his parents have thought all along, I’m a loser” (36). 

Win urges Sarah to consider a wilderness retreat, called Reignite, put on by her former coworker that is aimed at helping couples reconnect. Sarah is skeptical that Caleb will attend, implying that he is too obsessed with work and comparing him unfavorably to Bo, who dotes on Win. Win reminds Sarah that she owes Caleb a chance to prove himself.

In the past, Sarah and Caleb have just had sex for the first time in the backseat of his old Buick. They confess their love for each other. Sarah knows the level of devotion they feel is a risk at their age, but she decides to trust her feelings.

In the present, Sarah realizes that Caleb is taking longer than usual in the shower. She imagines that he is masturbating and thinks fondly of their sex life as a couple, especially as lovestruck teenagers. Marcie’s diagnosis with ALS shattered their carefree romance, but Caleb pitched in to help her care for Marcie. Sarah feels that their relationship was more equitable then, as she had a higher purpose that Caleb helped her fulfill.

Sarah checks on Caleb in the bathroom, but their conversation turns awkward. She suggests they address their current conflict but is offended when he says he has been avoiding a confrontation by focusing on work. Caleb steps closer to her, recounting that she usually apologizes through gestures, including sex. Before he can kiss her, Sarah blurts out, “I want to go hiking” (55). He is taken aback when Sarah describes the retreat. He suggests he would happily see a counselor with her in the city and is anxious at the idea of such an intense intervention. Sarah realizes, “I feel the urge to get out vibrating under my skin” (58). Caleb agrees to go.