Promise Me Sunshine

When Reese gets home from work one night, she has a tense exchange with Miles, and it is clear to Lenny that he is trying to help Reese with her grieving process as well, but she won’t let him in. Lenny goes to Miles’s apartment a few hours later and tries to comfort him for a change. He reveals that his current apartment used to belong to Reese and Ainsley, but they moved in with Carp when he got sick. He says that Carp had called him and asked him to come to the city shortly after he had a stroke, and it was only then that Reese learned she had a half-brother. All his life, Carp had kept Miles a secret, so his mother did her best to show him that she was proud to be his mother. Miles gives Reese a lot of slack to be mean to him since he knows that it must have been hard to have her view of her family suddenly transformed while she had to take care of both Carp and Ainsley on her own. Miles takes Lenny to a nearby bakery, where she is surprised to see Jericho, whose mother owns the bakery. Lenny gets a healthy treat and an indulgent one, and Miles tells her the formula he found to help him when he is grieving: “something good for you, […] something bad for you, […] and a change of scenery” (102).

Lenny texts Miles when she can’t sleep, and he calls her, but she rejects the call. She texts him a few days later when she has a mental health crisis because she is unable to order food for herself, and he talks her through it. Sometimes, Miles will text her first to check in on her and help her check items off her list. Lenny occasionally sleeps on Miles’s couch, and he sometimes comes over to the studio apartment to comfort her. He helps her realize that she doesn’t need to be okay right away. Miles offers to listen to Lenny talk about Lou for as long as she wants, and after about 45 minutes, Lenny feels better.

On a sunny day, Lenny takes Ainsley out to Central Park, and they talk about Miles. Lenny tells Ainsley that Miles is just nervous to be around her, and they think of ideas for how to help him. Lenny convinces Miles to take Ainsley to play badminton, and while Lenny is making dinner, Reese comes home after accidentally getting drunk at a client lunch. While Reese and Lenny are alone, they talk about Miles: Reese believes that Miles disapproves of her parenting. Lenny knows this couldn’t be further from the truth, and she explains that Miles is hanging around because he wants to learn to interact more comfortably with Ainsley. Reese reveals that her father missed her birth because he was with Miles’s mother, and Miles was born nine months later. It is clear to Lenny that Reese’s grief over her father’s death is complicated by anger and feelings of betrayal. Reese is bothered by the fact that Miles is nothing like her father.

She tells Lenny about one of their first conversations, where Miles berated her for not noticing how bad their father’s condition had gotten only 20 minutes after meeting her. Reese is especially bothered by this because she believes that Miles was right: She couldn’t take care of the two people she loved most in the world. Miles and Ainsley return while Reese is in the throes of her agony, but Lenny agrees to cover for her and take care of Ainsley. Lenny pulls Miles away to tell him about this and to make sure he goes easy on Reese. Then, Reese appears and surprisingly apologizes for snapping at Miles the other day. Lenny promises to stop by Miles’s apartment before she leaves, and she helps both Ainsley and Reese get into bed.

Lenny wakes up the next morning on Miles’s couch, where she receives an update on her phone for an upcoming concert. Lenny had booked two tickets to see her and Lou’s favorite K-pop band, 5Night, and seeing them live is one of the items on her Live Again list. Miles agrees to go with her, knowing how important this is to Lenny, but only if she can’t find someone else to go with her. Miles notes that Lenny is happiest around other people but has few people in her life since she devoted all her friendship and energy to Lou, so he suggests that she make a friend to go with her. Miles suggests that she ask Jericho because he was happy to see her and already knows that she would do something spontaneous, like inviting a person she barely knows to a concert.

Lenny crosses off another item on her list: going to the Met museum as much as possible. She feels uncomfortable as she sits in front of a painting by Georgia O’Keeffe, and she tries to talk to “Georgia” out loud, but an old man named George nearby hears her and thinks she is talking to him. They begin to talk about grief and the recent death of his wife. Lenny is particularly affected by another O’Keeffe painting of a skull among black clouds, along with George’s words about his wife: “Either she was going to die first, or I was” (125). She can’t stand to be in the Met any longer and races out crying. She later finds herself on the Staten Island ferry, feeling like she wants to die, and she calls Miles, who keeps her on the phone until he can reach her.

The day after Miles rescues Lenny from the ferry, he makes her take up running, which she hates. They go to Coney Island, and after they order food, Lenny tells Miles what she just fantasized about the cashier. They discuss their respective love lives. Miles seeks comfort while Lenny yearns for passion, yet both want to feel truly known. Miles tells Lenny about his last relationship, which ended around the time his father had a stroke. Lenny is glad to be making a new friend, and Miles thanks her for calling him when she needed him yesterday.