Pseudolus

The first we hear of Pseudolus’s master, Simo, is when Pseudolus reveals his intention to swindle Simo out of the money to free Phoenicium for Calidorus. When we first see him, he is telling his friend Callipho that his son Calidorus is in love with a prostitute and plans to steal money from him to free her. Despite being counseled by Callipho to be calm and understanding, Simo complains about Pseudolus’s “high and mighty” (458) attitude, saying he wants Pseudolus “tortured” (448). He warns Callipho that speaking with Pseudolus is like speaking with Socrates; when Pseudolus tells Simo he’s angry with him, Simo says he “need[s] to be on guard against your anger” (474) because he’s “planning / To whip me” (474-75). When, upon questioning, Pseudolus admits to the plan, Simo confers with Callipho, saying, “What was I just telling you, Callipho?” (489). Simo insists that Pseudolus will not be able to steal money from him; when Pseudolus clarifies that Simo will give him the money and that he also intends to take Phoenicium from Ballio, Simo agrees to a bet: if Pseudolus accomplishes these tasks, Simo will give him twenty minae, but if he doesn’t, Simo can send him to the mill. Before exiting, Simo expresses concern that Pseudolus and Ballio have “patched together some scheme / To cheat me out of some cash” (540-41); when we next see him, twelve scenes later, he again shares concern (and this time, for good reason) that he’s being tricked, asking Ballio, who gleefully informs him that he’s just handed Phoenicium over to the Macedonian soldier’s slave, whether they can “be sure he hasn’t put some scheme together” (1096). In the final scene, after Pseudolus’s success has been revealed, Simo chastises Pseudolus for his “impudence” (1298) in “[w]alking around drunk” (1298) and complains that he has “[n]ot an ounce of respect in him” (1298). Calling Pseudolus “a horrible, horrible person” (1310), he hands over twenty minae at Pseudolus’s request with a conciliatory, “Fair enough” (1313). He then asks the audience, “What should I do with him?” (1316) before promising revenge, which fails to frighten Pseudolus. When Pseudolus invites him for a drink, Simo expresses surprise before joining him.

At times Simo, seems intimidated by his slave Pseudolus, seeming to acknowledge Pseudolus’s wily thinking and intelligence. He is rightfully wary of Pseudolus, often expressing concern that he is being tricked. Whereas Pseudolus expresses confidence and a sense of superiority, Simo exhibits defensiveness, often showing himself to be the more passive man. His question of what to do with Pseudolus is rhetorical, as it is clear he has no power over him. In the end, he concedes defeat without a fight, giving Pseudolus the money he promised and even letting Pseudolus lead him offstage: when Pseudolus makes to exit, saying, “This way” (1331), Simo responds, “Right behind you” (1331). His walking behind his slave seems to represent Simo’s relationship to Pseudolus. Pseudolus has the power, leaving Simo always a step behind, both physically and intellectually.

Ballio’s first line in the play, “Come on now, you slackers” (133), encapsulates Ballio’s character in its impatience, meanness, and brutality. We see him whipping, threatening, and hurling vile insults at his slaves and prostitutes, and ordering his prostitutes to work harder because Ballio “want[s] a whole army of gift-givers” (181) for his birthday. When Pseudolus tries to reason with him about Phoenicium, Ballio refuses to listen to “[a] past supporter” (249) like Calidorus, who has run out of money. He relents when Pseudolus tells him “[t]here’s cash in it for you” (264), saying, “If I were in the middle / Of a sacrifice to mighty Jove and suddenly the chance to / Grab some cash arose—end of sacrifice right then and there!” (265-67). He tells Calidorus that if he truly loved Phoenicium, he would have “[f]ound a loanshark, paid some interest—or you could have / Ripped off your father” (287-88), for “[t]he only true lover is the one who keeps paying me forever” (306). He tells Calidorus that if the Macedonian soldier fails to send his slave with the sealed letter and the remaining five minae, Ballio will sell her to Calidorus, inspiring Pseudolus to devise a plan to steal her. Meeting by chance with Harpax, the Macedonian soldier’s slave, Pseudolus pretends to be Ballio’s slave, thereby obtaining the sealed letter; when Simia, pretending to be Harpax, approaches Ballio to complete the deal for Phoenicium, Ballio, wary at first, hands Phoenicium to Simia. Ballio, who’s been warned by Simo that Pseudolus is planning to trick him, boasts to Simo that Pseudolus is too late. When the real Harpax demands Ballio give him Phoenicium, Ballio and Simo believe Harpax has been set up by Pseudolus, and they tease him mercilessly until it becomes clear Ballio’s been tricked after all. Ballio, lamenting that Pseudolus has “ruined [him]” (1228), reluctantly gives Harpax back his money; horrified that Simo is going to hold him accountable for their own bet, he tells him he’ll pay him tomorrow.

Ballio’s paying Harpax and, presumably, Simo, is his only redeeming act: he shows himself to be mean-spirited, violent, and shamelessly mercenary. Two scenes in Pseudolus seem to exist solely to display Ballio’s cruelty. In the first, a slave boy sneaks out briefly to tell the audience how his “life is a mountain of misery” (771); how Ballio has told his slaves that if they don’t offer him “exquisite gifts” (777) for his birthday, they will suffer “exquisite torture tomorrow” (778); and how he’s forced by Ballio to perform as a prostitute. In the second, Ballio insults a cook he’s hired for his birthday party, calling him “a babbler, a bragger, a fool and a slacker” (794), and that he should “go to hell” (839).

If Ballio’s only redeeming act is his willingness to pay the money he owes, his only redeeming quality is his self-awareness. He does not deny that he is a “degenerate” (359), telling Pseudolus that if he himself dies, Pseudolus will “become the most worthless man in Athens” (339). He also willingly, and almost gleefully, submits to Pseudolus’s “verbal assault” (359), answering Pseudolus’s accusations of being a “[b]ag of crap” (360), “[t]raitor” (362), and “[d]anger to public safety” (365) with “[a]in’t that the truth” (360), “[m]y specialty” (362), and “[w]ell, duh” (365). His meanness and ruthlessness help make Pseudolus look commendable by comparison. Spectators thus find themselves rooting for Pseudolus and feeling satisfied when Ballio loses.

Harpax is the Macedonian soldier’s slave who is tasked with transferring five minae and a sealed letter to Ballio in order to complete the deal to purchase Phoenicium. Encountering Pseudolus, who pretends to be Ballio’s slave, Harpax gives him the sealed letter but refuses to give him the money, saying he’s going to take a nap at the inn and that Pseudolus, pretending to be Ballio’s slave, Surus, should fetch him when Ballio returns. Pseudolus gives the letter and five minae to Simia, who then, disguised as Harpax, tricks Ballio into handing Phoenicium to him. Harpax, irritated at not having been sent for, returns, confronts Ballio and Simo, who tease and insult him, believing him to be conspiring with Pseudolus. When Ballio finally realizes Harpax is indeed the soldier’s true slave, Harpax, confounded by Ballio and Simo’s behavior, demands Ballio return the money.

Harpax sings his own virtues, saying he does not “meet nor greet” (1111-12) slaves who “declare themselves free men / The instant they’re out of their masters’ sight” (1105-06) or who spend “what little they have in whorehouses” (1107). He himself, he says, completes his orders “whether master’s present or absent” (1113). That his being tricked by Pseudolus prevents his following through with his master’s orders to take possession of Phoenicium reinforces the irony of the play: those who seem to defy systems of morality and social hierarchy in fact are most likely to succeed.

Simia is a slave of the father of Calidorus’s friend, Charinus. At Pseudolus’s direction, Simia disguises himself as Harpax and tricks Ballio into delivering Phoenicium. When Pseudolus tells Charinus he needs a man who is “unscrupulous, / Clever, devious and smart” (724-25), Charinus recommends Simia, who can “twist his way out of a bad situation” (745), has “been tried and convicted many times” (746), and if “caught red-handed” (747) can slip away like “an eel” (747). Pseudolus is satisfied, saying he “sounds like a great guy” (749).

When Pseudolus and Simia meet, they playfully chide and verbally battle each other, each appearing a match for the other. Pseudolus, impressed, says, “I love, cherish, and honor your dishonesty!” (945). As Pseudolus watches, Simia, dressed as Harpax, approaches Ballio; when Ballio demands Simia tell him the Macedonian soldier’s name, Simia, who doesn’t know the name, manages to trick Ballio into revealing it himself. He is so wily in his success at tricking Ballio that Pseudolus claims, “Never, ever have I seen a worse human being, / A more deviously wicked fellow than this Simia!” (1017-18). Pseudolus also worries that the clever Simia will decide to turn against him. When Simia emerges with Phoenicium, Pseudolus wants him to explain what took him so long. Simia insists they make their escape before they are caught. Simia is another example of how in the world of Pseudolus, good is bad and bad is good. Simia is the vehicle through which Pseudolus’s plan comes to fruition. Though he is described as unscrupulous and criminal, he is instrumental in bringing about the satisfying ending.