60 pages • 2-hour read
Punk 57
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Symbols & Motifs
The Letters
The written word has a significant presence in the novel, from the letters between Misha and Ryen to the journal scrawlings, wall writings, and graffiti messages left wherever they go. Most significantly, Ryen and Misha’s letters function as a symbol of the love they hold for one another, and their recurrence operates as a motif for the theme of The Importance of Maintaining Close Relationships.
Ryen and Misha have built a deep, intimate relationship with one another through their seven years as pen pals. Both characters cherish their letters from one another, with Ryen keeping all Misha’s letters under her bed, and Misha taking his favorite letters with him wherever he goes, calling them—and Ryen—his muse. However, when Misha’s side of the correspondence grows cold, Ryen is left feeling like he’s abandoned or deprioritized her. Ryen’s concerns that a lack of letters from Misha means the end of their friendship solidifies the letters as a symbol of the strength of their relationship and develops the idea that it’s important to maintain close relationships.
In Chapter 15, after Ryen finds out that Misha has betrayed her by posing as Masen, she leaves a collection of Misha’s letters on the floor of his room as a message that she wants nothing to do with him anymore. She also steals her letters back from Misha, who is left distraught by their absence. Misha narrates, “Those letters are everything […] They’re where I first started to fall for her and need her” (245). Misha’s reaction to losing Ryen’s letters represents his fear of losing Ryen.
As Ryen and Misha make amends, Ryen learns that Misha still has every letter she sent to him—not just the ones she stole. She agrees to return the letters and says she’d like the letters she left on his floor back as well. Although Ryen had said she’d burned the letters, she admits to lying, showing that she never gave up her love for Misha, even when she was upset. Ryen and Misha’s letters are not only the basis of their relationship but also a symbol of the love they feel for one another and a motif that develops The Importance of Maintaining Close Relationships.
Ryen’s Inhaler
Ryen’s inhaler functions as a symbol of her insecurities about her true self, as she works to keep her inhaler hidden from all her school friends, afraid of what they might say. In Chapter 4, Ryen recalls being on the playground in fourth grade, and being mocked because “No one else in my class has an inhaler, and now it makes me even more different” (77). Since this moment, Ryen has kept her inhaler a secret to protect herself from the mockery.
Ryen’s need to hide her inhaler sometimes leads to prolonged asthmatic episodes for her, as she fights to keep her attacks under control until she can privately puff on her inhaler. Misha is one of the only people who knows about Ryen’s inhaler because he’s one of the only people who knows about Ryen’s inner workings, thoughts, and insecurities. Misha proves this in Chapter 10 when he retrieves Ryen’s inhaler from her bag without her needing to tell him.
As Ryen’s character develops, she begins to feel less self-conscious about herself, and she cares less about what her shallow friends might think of her. When Ryen attends prom in Chapter 21, surrounded by the truest of her old friends and several new friends, she realizes that there’s nothing to hide anymore. When Ryen realizes she needs her inhaler after partying on the dance floor, she decides, “Screw it. Taking a puff, I see J. D. do a double take, but he only looks surprised as I take another one and try to inhale” (319). J. D. doesn’t give Ryen any trouble for needing an inhaler, and he only asks if she’s okay before dropping the topic completely. The author symbolizes Ryen’s realization that she doesn’t need to hide herself when surrounded by the right people by her use of her inhaler.
Misha’s Watch
The narrative introduces Misha’s watch in the first chapter as an imitation of the real timepiece, which was stolen long ago. Misha vows, “I will find it. But until then, I’m stuck with a piece of crap sitting in its place on my grandfather’s cuff” (6). Misha’s watch functions as a symbol of the false nature of both Misha’s and Ryen’s alternate personas and a motif for the theme of Staying True to Oneself.
Misha poses as Masen Laurent for the first half of the novel, deceiving Ryen with his fake identity and seducing her under false pretenses with information he shouldn’t have already known about her. Meanwhile, Ryen’s entire persona has been fake for years, ever since she decided to discard her true self to fit in with the popular crowd. For the duration that Misha’s real watch is missing, Misha and Ryen’s false personas butt heads and create conflict for one another because of these false personas. While Misha antagonizes Ryen with his Masen persona, Ryen’s plastic exterior torments Misha, who knows she’s capable of being a much better, deeper person than she portrays herself as at school.
In Chapter 14, Misha brings Ryen to break into Trey’s house and search for the missing watch. During this break-in, Ryen breaks down and confesses to “Masen” that she “turned into this […] because I was a kid and I thought there was something more. I traded friends I didn’t think were good enough for friends who really aren’t good enough” (231). In pursuit of the real watch, Misha brings out the real person inside Ryen, as she confesses to not being true to herself. Later in this same chapter, Ryen discovers that Masen has been a false persona, Misha all along.
By the time Misha recovers his watch from Trey’s wrist in Chapter 16, both characters have dropped their false personas and come to understand who each other are on the inside. Ryen is no longer trying to appease her former friends in the popular crowd, and Misha is no longer pretending to be Masen. The recovery of Misha’s watch coincides with Misha and Ryen dropping the false parts of themselves, making the timepiece a motif for Staying True to Oneself.
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