“My ideas are great 

but he never listens to me 

only to music 

with too many guitars.

I could learn the guitar.”

Kevin tries to endear himself to his older, guitar-playing brother, Petey, by offering him name suggestions for his band. Petey’s disregard for Kevin’s ideas makes Kevin feel defensive. He wants his brother to give him attention and wants to prove himself to Petey. This stanza conveys Kevin’s longing for acceptance, with him insisting that his “ideas are great” even though Petey does not appreciate them.

“If I am stone 

My foot is jagged, cold, strong.

If I am stone 

I don’t laugh when Robin trips on my jagged foot 

and slides down the aisle between desks 

like he’s a pebble rolling downhill.

I’m not always stone.”

Kevin uses metaphors and descriptive language to express his inarticulable emotions. He compares himself to a “stone” because he does not want to feel emotion. He wants to be as strong and unbreakable as rock because he does not want to reflect on or feel remorse for his aggression toward others. What Kevin is really avoiding is owning his vulnerability and hurt. He makes Robin feel like “a pebble rolling downhill” because this is how Kevin himself often feels. The latter line foreshadows how Kevin will gradually learn to confront his vulnerability, as he is confessing for the first time that he might not be as strong as he makes himself out to be (“I’m not always stone”).

“A secret message 

left from a secret word scratcher. 

The teachers are not happy, 

and that makes it even more fun.”

Kevin uses his found poems to distinguish himself from his peers. He makes the poems from the pages he rips out of old library books and then hangs them on the school walls or classroom doors. Most often, these poems are insulting or slanderous and make fun of teachers in particular. Kevin is glad that the poems rile the teachers because he is getting attention—even if it is negative attention. He is so starved for attention and love at home that he seeks punishment at school.

“And then the big, messy racket was gone. 

Petey sniffed real big and said 

What are you staring at? 

YOU’RE the baby 

in this 

family.

And he’s hated me. 

Hated me 

ever 

since.”

Kevin identifies the day of the tornado as the day everything changed between him and Petey and thus for him at home. Kevin hugged and comforted his older brother when he cried during the storm, and Petey was ashamed for showing his younger brother his vulnerability. In turn, he began acting out against Kevin—using violence to prove that he was stronger than him. The tornado is a significant image throughout Kevin’s story because it’s a metaphor for emotional tumult.

“If I stare at the stain on the ceiling 

I don’t have to stare at Hartwick 

while he says 

Woh woh woh 

and tells me to 

STRAIGHTEN UP.

He called my mom 

but she didn’t answer. 

Again. 

So he gave me 

another warning.

But 

THE NEXT TIME 

he says 

while I stare at the stain 

THERE WILL BE MAJOR CONSEQUENCES 

… 

MISTER

He is still 

a jerkface.”

Kevin’s experience at Principal Hartwick’s office contributes to The Challenges and Rewards of Personal Growth, one of the novel’s main themes. At this juncture of the novel, Kevin does not care that he is being punished because he does not believe that the principal’s threats or actions have any weight. He calls Kevin’s mother, but she “d[oes]n’t answer,” which shows that his parents are unaffected by his behavior. Hartwick yells at Kevin, but Kevin does not even look the principal in the eyes, choosing instead to “stare the stain,” which shows that he is quieting his emotions to prove himself impervious to the authority figures in his life. At this point in the narrative, Kevin is still trying to shape his identity in opposition to everyone around him.

“Doesn’t Petey see? 

I don’t exist.

I had to walk six blocks 

because of 

Lacey Lacey Lacey 

and get a tardy 

and a detention for hitting Giant John 

because of Petey. 

Who is not—technically—the baby. 

Anymore.”

Kevin blames everything that happens to him on his brother because he is reluctant to take accountability for his own actions. The poem furthers the novel’s theme of the causes and repercussions of bullying. Kevin blames Petey for making him late, which in turn caused him to hit John and get attention. Kevin acts out against others because he feels hurt and overlooked. He justifies his own actions because of his unattended pain and lack of proper coping mechanisms.

“Freckle-Face Kelly wipes her face. 

Those little red spots don’t smear 

like you think they should. 

She looks at me. 

Robin looks at me. 

Everyone looks at me. 

Freckle-Face Kelly looks away first. 

I think she wants to be stone, too. 

In one move Robin is under my arm 

kicking 

yelling 

but he can’t sting me. 

You can’t sting stone.”

Kevin’s interactions with his classmates in this scene further the theme of the causes and repercussions of bullying by conveying violence as a cycle. Robin acts out against Kelly because Kevin has been mean to him. Witnessing Robin’s unkindness to Kelly, Kevin then beats up on Robin once again. Although Kevin is coming to Kelly’s defense in this scene, he is still responding to violence with violence—which does not resolve the issue and only creates more hurt. Indeed, Kevin ends the poem reiterating that he is “stone,” which underscores his continued belief that he has to be unemotional to be strong and to survive.

“Suspended. 

A word that can describe medicine. 

The little bits of healthy mold 

suspended 

in pink goo 

so that the kids like the bits enough 

to swallow them. 

Suspended. 

A word that can describe stopping 

like someone hit a pause button and you are 

suspended 

in time and space 

your finger frozen inches from your 

nose. 

Suspended. 

A word that can describe 

me.”

Kevin’s response to his school suspension captures how he uses The Value of Poetry as a Coping Mechanism. He does not know how to process this new punishment for his bullying, so he writes about it. He analyzes the word “suspended,” exploring different definitions of it and considering their metaphoric meaning. This poetic wordplay offers Kevin the space to make sense of his experience in a safe way. He is beginning to use poetry to address his experiences instead of channeling his feelings into violence.

“I am supposed to 

think 

I’ll never do anything like that 

again. 

You know what I really 

think? 

Petey shoves me under the sink 

in the bathroom at home 

All. 

The. 

Time. 

No. 

Big. 

Deal. 

No. 

One. 

Cares.”

Kevin’s experiences of violence have caused him to use violence against others. These stanzas from his poem “Day 19” explicitly identify Petey’s bullying habits as the reason for Kevin’s own bullying habits. Kevin is so hurt by Petey and so angry that “no one cares” that he tries to hurt others without repercussions, too. His actions only create more hurt and shame. At this juncture of the story, Kevin is still not ready to change, but these lines do suggest that he has the capacity for self-reflection.

“Paul told Petey to watch it. 

Petey said Watch THIS. 

And then punched a wall. 

Paul rumpled my hair. 

I think my getting suspended bothered Paul 

more than anyone else. 

More than 

me.”

When Paul confronts Petey for bullying Kevin, Kevin feels seen by one of his family members for the first time. When Paul steps in on Kevin’s behalf, Kevin feels that his suspension has actually created positive change. The moment also initiates Paul’s emerging role as Kevin’s at-home guide. Paul becomes increasingly aware of Kevin’s feelings and needs over the course of the novel and helps him through many challenges.

“Paul says even stones have to crack 

to let out steam. 

But what he doesn’t understand is that 

there is always someone 

who wants to stick their head in a crack 

and sniff around. 

Hahaha. 

But seriously. 

Paul is annoying.”

One of the ways Paul encourages Kevin to face the challenges and rewards of personal growth is by encouraging him to feel his own feelings. Kevin has convinced himself that he has to be a “rock” at home and at school because he thinks showing vulnerability is a sign of weakness. Paul suggests otherwise, challenging Kevin to honor and create space for his feelings. Kevin makes fun of his brother, dismisses his point of view, and makes a crass joke, but these are only self-defense mechanisms. Kevin does value Paul’s opinion but has been unaccustomed to accepting help.

“I’m glad for the books today, 

heavy in my hands. 

They go on the shelves, 

one after the other. 

I don’t have to think. 

I don’t want to think. 

Building a fortress 

of books 

all around me. 

I worked for an hour before I realized 

today is Tuesday. 

The day after 

my library detentions ended.”

Kevin’s after-school library detention unexpectedly offers him a safe place. He initially resents the punishment but soon falls in love with the library. In this scene, his regard for the space and his job there is changing. He compares the books to “a fortress,” which implies that they are protecting him. The library becomes a refuge, too, where Kevin feels safe and can explore his emotions and his art without shame.

“Today I scream with them: 

I feel lost all the time 

A toy in a shoe 

A sock in the trash 

What do I do? 

The boy who is lost 

Though they see me right here 

I cannot be found 

But I can’t disappear. 

Until Petey comes to my room 

and tells me to shut up. 

Your dumb rhymes are ruining the music, he says, 

and I want to laugh 

but it sticks in my throat 

because ruining things 

seems to be my new specialty.”

Kevin again tries to endear himself to his brother and prove his relevance by writing lyrics for Petey’s band. Kevin is entertaining himself while feeling hopeful that Petey will recognize his talent and invite him in. However, Petey’s uncharitable response only reinforces Kevin’s insecurity. He wishes that he could do and be better but struggles to see himself outside the context of his family’s and teachers’ punishments. Kevin indeed is the “toy in the shoe” and “the sock in the trash” who feels lost and alone. His lyrics reveal his true feelings, which reiterates the value of poetry as a coping mechanism.

“Why did Mrs. Little have to tell? 

Her eyes seem to like me. 

Her ears seem to hear me. 

Why would she want me in trouble? 

Maybe she’s lonely 

in the big library 

all by herself. 

Maybe she needs company.”

Mrs. Little’s character plays the part of a guide and mentor in Kevin’s school life. He is initially unsure of how to process her contradictory behavior. On the one hand, Mrs. Little turns him into the principal for writing the found poems, but on the other hand, she pays attention and listens to Kevin. Kevin is still learning what it means to have balanced, reciprocal relationships; he is still learning what it means to have reliable authority figures in his life who both challenge him to be better and give him the grace to change. These lines also convey Kevin’s capacity for empathy, in that he imagines Mrs. Little’s experience—something he is not in the habit of doing.

“I am not a stone. 

I am not a rock. 

I am not giant and unblinking and cold. 

There is an earthquake. 

In my guts. 

Shaking and quaking. 

Quaking and shaking. 

Cracking and jagged. 

Jagged and cracking. 

Breaking everything into sharp points, 

poking my insides 

until I want to scream.”

Kevin’s response to Robin’s bullying reveals his vulnerability. Robin has copied pages of Kevin’s notebook and passed them out to his classmates—an action that has made Kevin feel weak and ashamed. He compares himself to a rock being destroyed by an earthquake. He does not feel strong and feels himself shattering into countless pieces. His use of metaphors and imagery enacts the intensity of his emotions. These lines also mark a turning point along Kevin’s experience of the causes and repercussions of bullying.

“Kelly grabs my hand 

in the middle of the shouting fight 

with Robin. 

My face catches on fire. 

She drags me off. She says, 

Maybe if you apologize to him, he’ll stop. 

And I say, 

Bluh, whugh, huh blerf 

because she’s still holding my hand.”

Kelly’s character challenges Kevin to grow, too. He has also bullied her in the past, but instead of retaliating, Kelly defends Kevin against Robin. She intercedes when Robin is verbally abusing Kevin, rescuing him from another potentially violent exchange. She also holds his hand and encourages him to apologize. These are acts of kindness and grace that encourage Kevin to take accountability for his mistakes and make amends. His inarticulate response (“Bluh, whugh, huh blerf”) reflects his embarrassment and incipient attraction to Kelly since she is “still holding [his] hand.”

“I make it a rule 

to not think about school when I’m at home. 

But I can’t help wondering 

What kind of TV show does Robin live in? 

What kind of TV show does Kelly live in? 

What kind of TV show does Mrs. Little live in? 

Do they have live audience laugh tracks? 

A chorus of ‘awww’s? 

I bet Mrs. Little has a funny theme song 

running through her show, 

that seems simple, 

but then busts out with bongos. 

Always a surprise.”

Kevin’s musings on his classmates’ and teachers’ home lives convey his capacity for self-reflection, empathy, and imagination. His experiences at home with his own family inspire him to think about others’ potential experiences at home, too. He imagines other people’s experiences, demonstrating his ability to create space for others. His thoughts on Mrs. Little’s life also provide insight into their developing connection. She has indeed emerged as a surprising mentor, role model, and friend for Kevin.

“There are people who talk 

so much 

all the time 

forever 

with words falling from their mouths 

like crumbs 

from a sandwich. 

But then there are people who never talk 

hardly ever. 

Except with their eyes 

and their head-tilts 

and their lips that can smile and frown 

at the same time. 

Mrs. Little says so much 

without ever 

ever 

SHOUTING ABOUT RESPONSIBILITY.”

Mrs. Little’s silent presence in this scene offers Kevin a rare sense of acceptance and safety. In his poem, he reflects on how uncharacteristic her behavior is for an adult. Kevin is so accustomed to the adults in his life reprimanding or punishing him that Mrs. Little’s quiet presence feels remarkable. She is showing Kevin that she cares and that she sees him by simply holding space for his disappointed feelings. She reminds him that people care and that he has value simply by being himself.

“My words. 

Coming from the guy who looks like the other guys. 

They saw my paper. 

They’re singing my rhymes. 

I am so happy I punch the air. 

And it feels better 

than punching Giant John 

ever did.”

Kevin’s response to hearing Petey’s band play his rhymes furthers the novel’s theme of the value of poetry as a coping mechanism. Throughout the novel, Kevin has bullied his peers to deal with his upset, pain, and hurt from Petey’s unkindness. He has also used his poetry as an outlet to express his anger and hatred. In this moment, however, Kevin realizes that poetry can connect him with others and is a better way of coping than violence, as reflected in the lines “it feels better / than punching Giant John / ever did.”

“The bench is hard and the metal hurts my back 

but it’s better out here than inside 

listening to Mom apologize for me. 

Always the mistake. 

Always ruining things. 

I kick a rock out from under the bench. 

It hits a trash can, and with a BANG, 

it breaks in half. 

Good.”

The imagery in these stanzas conveys how Kevin feels. The “hard,” “metal” bench echoes the coldness he feels from his family. He is always held to rigid standards of behavior, which he struggles to satisfy and which make him feel trapped. The image of the rock then echoes the vulnerability that Kevin feels. He normally compares himself to a rock because he sees them as unbreakable, but in this scene, the rock “breaks in half.” Kevin feels that he is breaking, too.

“The words she just said in there… 

so many 

at one time. 

More than I’ve ever heard her say. 

And they were all about me. 

And they were nice. 

They didn’t fall from her mouth. 

They flew. 

Like flaming arrows. 

Flaming arrows keeping everyone away. 

But keeping me warm.”

Kevin uses metaphors and figurative language to convey his gratitude for Mrs. Little’s support. He likens the compliments she gives him to “flaming arrows” that “keep [him] warm.” The image of the flaming arrows conjures notions of a protective weapon, while the mention of warmth evokes notions of comfort and safety. Mrs. Little stands up for Kevin to his parents, making him feel valued and seen.

“Best night. 

It’s all I can say 

because there are too many words 

to sort through.”

Kevin’s brief four-line poem in response to the open-mic night conveys how speechless the outing has made him. Typically, he expresses himself with lengthy poetic explorations where he compares each facet of his experience to something else. The open-mic night was so impressive to Kevin that he cannot immediately reflect on it—even in his poetry. The moment identifies the open-mic night as a turning point in his experience and his journey toward change.

“I shake Robin’s hand. 

So small in my own. 

I don’t mean it. 

He doesn’t mean it. 

Except I sort of do. 

I’m sorry for what I’ve done. 

I’m sorry I made him hate me. 

I’m sorry he turned me into jagged rock. 

I wonder if he is sorry, too.”

Kevin’s ability to own his remorse captures how he has changed as a person, invoking the theme of the challenges and rewards of personal growth. Before this, he has tried to distinguish himself by acting out and hurting others. In this moment, he realizes that his violence has only created pain and that he doesn’t want to be this person anymore. He never finds out if Robin regrets his actions, but Kevin is still able to take accountability for his role in this dynamic. His admittance, “Except I sort of do [mean my apology],” reflects his growing empathy and his new ability to take accountability for his actions.