Softly, As I Leave You: Life After Elvis

American musician Elvis Presley is a key figure throughout Priscilla’s memoir, as he was Priscilla’s first love and former husband. Elvis Presley is widely known as one of the leading figures in rock and roll. He came from humble beginnings in Memphis, Tennessee. His mother, Gladys, died suddenly in 1958 when Elvis was 23 years old; this loss impacted the rest of his life.

Twenty-four-year-old Elvis met 14-year-old Priscilla when he was stationed in Germany in 1959. Elvis was serving in the armed forces and Priscilla’s father, Paul Beaulieu, was there with the Air Force. Elvis’s music was already growing in popularity, so Priscilla was familiar with his work. They began dating, and married seven years later, when Priscilla was 21. In the meantime, Elvis grew in fame and popularity, eventually becoming the so-called King of Rock and Roll—a resounding icon in the music world.

In Softly, As I Leave You, Priscilla seeks to shed light on her decision to leave Elvis four years prior to his death in 1977. After 13 years of marriage, Priscilla realized that Elvis’s lifestyle was unsustainable for her and their young daughter, Lisa Marie Presley. She still loved Elvis; contrary to popular opinion, she did not leave him because of his infidelity or her affair with her karate instructor, Mike Stone. Priscilla never shows remorse for her decision to leave Elvis, but does admit that it was one of the most painful and complicated choices she’s ever made. Elvis remained a part of her life until his death. According to Priscilla, the two had an indelible bond and sustained a meaningful friendship and functional co-parenting arrangement.

Priscilla seeks to demonstrate her sustained love for Elvis and her continued investment in cementing his legacy by repeatedly writing about his positive traits, honoring his humanity, and creating space for a more nuanced version of the man she shared her youth with. Aside from acknowledging his talent, good looks, and charm, she underscores what a sensitive, loving, generous, and deep-thinking person he was. She argues that most people don’t know the real Elvis and that time has distorted his persona into a caricature—a phenomenon she has challenged via her documentarian and authorial work.

Priscilla and Elvis’s daughter Lisa Marie Presley is another key figure. Lisa Marie was conceived on the couple’s wedding night, which shocked them and altered the parameters of their relationship forever. Although Priscilla holds that Elvis deeply loved Lisa Marie, he “was a typical man of his time, expecting me to do all the physical care of our daughter” (12). He also refused to change his schedule to meet Lisa Marie’s needs and eventually insisted that Priscilla hire a nanny to care for their young daughter. Overcome by guilt that she wasn’t caring for her child how she wanted to, Priscilla decided to leave Elvis when Lisa Marie was four years old. The couple came to a shared custody arrangement thereafter.

Lisa Marie was devastated by her father’s death when she was just nine years old. She had spent much of her childhood frolicking at his Graceland mansion and reveling in her famous father’s attention. Afterward, she struggled to orient to life without her dad—especially given that Priscilla’s parenting style was so much more conventional than her late father’s. Priscilla also holds that Lisa Marie lived under the weight of her father’s celebrity and musical legacy. No matter how much Priscilla tried to protect her, the world always saw Lisa Marie as Elvis’s daughter first. If she made a mistake, the media capitalized on it. If she attempted to play music, the media compared her negatively to Elvis.

Priscilla paints Lisa Marie as a complex, fiery woman. Lisa Marie had addiction issues throughout her life, which Priscilla attributes to a genetic predisposition. Priscilla holds that Lisa Marie was always a rebel with a temper who resented having to follow rules, go to school, or take responsibility for herself. Lisa Marie also felt like an outsider, turning to drugs as a way to cope with her simultaneous alienation and fame. Priscilla describes Lisa Marie’s substance use in detail, but never disparages her daughter because of her addiction. Rather, she writes with sensitivity and empathy, exploring how cycles of trauma impact the psyche and how this phenomenon impacted her daughter’s experience.

Lisa Marie had four children: Riley Keough, Benjamin Keough, Harper Lockwood, and Finley Lockwood. When Lisa Marie first became a mother, Priscilla struggled to orient to her new role as grandmother. She loved her grandchildren but didn’t know how to reconcile being an actress and businesswoman with being a grandparent. Over time, she assumed a more significant role in her grandkids’ lives. She even became Harper and Finley’s temporary guardian during Lisa Marie’s messy divorce and custody battle with their father, Michael Lockwood. Despite these complications, Priscilla underscores what a loving mother Lisa Marie was. Lisa Marie was especially attached to Benjamin, whose death by suicide in 2020 devastated her. Priscilla attributes Lisa Marie’s emotional turmoil and premature death to her grief over losing Benjamin.

Lisa Marie was also a singer and songwriter. Priscilla repeatedly notes how talented her daughter was, and even includes some of her lyrics within the memoir. She was devastated that Lisa Marie gave up her musical career after her album Storm and Grace wasn’t nominated for a Grammy.

When Lisa Marie was put on life support in 2023, Priscilla decided not to keep her on the machine, knowing that “my girl, my wild, rebellious, passionate girl [would not want to be] lying in a vegetative state for the rest of her life” (295). Years have passed since Lisa Marie’s death, but Priscilla wakes up every morning thinking about her daughter and trying to adjust to the reality of her passing.