Bunnie’s father, Bill, played a complex and often contradictory role in her life. Their relationship shaped Bunnie’s maladjusted understanding of love and sent her down a decades-long path of self-destruction. As a musician with a tendency toward casual relationships, Bill provided some measure of affection—Bunnie has pleasant memories of making music together—but he also exposed Bunnie to adult sexuality and inconsistent caregiving at an early age. Bunnie’s desperate need for her father’s love and approval as he focused on other women began her lifelong tendency to pursue toxic men, seeking the approval she’d never gotten from Bill. Bill’s marriage to the abusive Mindy introduced further instability, while Bunnie’s relationship with him became complicated by his inability or unwillingness to intervene in Mindy’s mistreatment.

In the memoir, Bill represents both protection and betrayal. While he occasionally shielded Bunnie from external threats, he also failed to address internal family dysfunction, exposed her to physical abuse at Mindy’s hand, and was neglectful in ways that led to Bunnie being sexually assaulted. Bill’s unexpected death from cancer prevented Bunnie from reconciling with him, ensuring that his lifelong patterns of avoidance were never overcome.

Jelly became Bunnie’s most stable and genuine partner and eventual husband. Unlike her previous partners, Jelly emphasized honesty and planning for the future. He came from an unstable background, but like Bunnie, wanted to improve his life for himself and his daughter. Their relationship is defined by mutual understanding that comes from similar trauma and becomes crucial to the theme of differentiating love and abuse. Jelly demonstrates consistent emotional support and acts as a pillar of support as Bunnie pursues sobriety and leaves sex work behind. Bunnie and Jelly also support one another professionally.

Jelly is not without flaws; Bunnie’s memoir recounts moments of infidelity that almost broke the relationship. Despite setbacks, Jelly’s willingness to confront difficult conversations allows Bunnie to heal both within herself and within their relationship. He is part of her journey toward stability, and their relationship demonstrates the importance of partnerships built on respect and mutual growth.

Bunnie’s biological mother, Vanessa, was largely absent from her life due to issues with substance use and mental illness. In the memoir, Vanessa is an example of both love and absence. Her life was shaped by chronic instability, which affected her ability to be a parent. When Bunnie reconnected with Vanessa as an adult, she had to make peace with having a parent in need of care rather than providing the guidance she’d hoped for. With a variety of illnesses, Vanessa rejected medical intervention and accepted her death despite Bunnie’s pleas for her to fight.

Although Bunnie did not know her mother in childhood, she learned that she had recapitulated her mother’s trajectory of sex work and substance use, showing the challenges inherent in breaking intergenerational patterns. Despite her limitations, Vanessa contributed to Bunnie’s understanding of her identity and origins. Her death forced Bunnie to experience grief without denial or dissociation and to forgive her mother.