31 pages • 1-hour read
The Knight in Rusty Armor
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Themes
The Struggle With Personal Fears and Doubts
While the knight struggles through difficult external conflicts like silence, complete darkness, and steep slopes, the novella’s allegorical nature means that these settings are all representative of mental and interpersonal struggles with concepts like fear and doubt. The role of fear and doubt in the knight’s life is what led to him being trapped in his literal and symbolic “armor,” and the knight’s internal conflict with these characteristics shows how devastating their consequences can be to relationships and happiness.
The knight’s armor stems from fear. The first time the knight is confronted with this fact is when Merlin tries to give him the drink called “Life.” The knight looks at the drink “suspiciously” and inquires what it is, prompting Merlin to muse, “You are so afraid” (13). The knight’s fear and hesitation to drink Life symbolize his fear of fully living his own life. At this early point in the knight’s journey, Merlin provides the knight with answers, rather than answering his questions with more questions, as the knight doesn’t yet have any foundation for understanding his mistakes and improving himself. Merlin says that fear is “why [the knight] put on the armor in the first place” (13): He put a literal and symbolic barrier up between himself and the world to protect himself.
The knight slowly realizes that this “armor” only appears to shield him from the things he is afraid of, while in reality, it holds him back. The heaviness of the armor makes his path more difficult: Shortly after embarking on the Path of Truth, “the knight collapsed, exhausted […] not used to travelling in armor without his horse” (28). This moment illustrates how erecting symbolic “armor” around oneself, even if that armor is meant as a shield against fear and doubt, can make it more difficult to live life happily. The novella argues that the way to overcome fear and doubt is not to shield oneself from it but to gain new, helpful tools and face it head-on. In particular, the self-knowledge that one gains via introspection is a handy tool against fear and doubt. The voice of “Sam” says, “Self-knowledge is truth, and you know what they say: Truth is mightier than the sword” (63). Sam points out that what one gains by surrendering the armor and weapons is actually a better “weapon” against them than the armor ever was. The knight uses these accumulated skills to defeat the allegorical figure of the Dragon of Fear and Doubt, proving that armor is only a temporary barrier, but gaining the skills of self-awareness and introspection can provide a lifetime of aid.
The Role of Friends and Family in Personal Development
The Knight in Rusty Armor paints a nuanced view of how the support of friends and family can assist the knight in his journey toward self-betterment. It illustrates how loved ones can prove integral to growth, offering support and survival in moments when people cannot adequately care for themselves. However, the narrative also highlights that the help of friends and family can only go so far, as some aspects of the journey must be undertaken alone in order to reap their full benefits.
The knight’s first lesson in his journey toward self-awareness and personal development is the effect his current behavior has on his family. The knight initially sees Juliet and Christopher almost as accessories in his knightly lifestyle. Juliet says he doesn’t really love her “enough to rescue [her] from that dragon,” but instead “loves the idea of rescuing” her (3). The knight realizes he loves his son because he “needed a son to go out and do battle in his father’s name when the father grew old” (49). In both of these cases, he doesn’t love them for the people they are, but for the status they can bring him. These are not the ideal roles for his family to have in his life. He has to learn that Juliet and Christopher are whole, complex people who do not merely play a supporting role in his life. They deserve to be loved for themselves, not for what they can do for him. Merlin helps him reckon with the fact that if he doesn’t shift his priorities and start thinking about their needs, rather than his own, Juliet and Christopher might live a better and happier life without him.
With the characters of Squirrel and Rebecca, the novella demonstrates how friends can help the knight on his journey toward self-improvement, but it also highlights the limitations of their support. At first, the knight needs Squirrel “to help [him] eat” (26), since only she is small enough to chew nuts and push them through his visor. Rebecca also helps through her previous experience on the same journey, since she has “been to the top of the mountain” and knows the way (26). Friends like Squirrel and Rebecca can be support systems on the knight’s journey to self-improvement, helping to get the knight his basic necessities or showing him the way. However, though friends can help with some aspects of his journey, there are some parts that he must handle himself. For instance, Merlin denies the knight the use of a horse to help him up the mountain, saying he must use his own foot power to “take an unknown trail while encumbered with heavy armor” (25). The knight wanted to pass the struggle of carrying his armor onto his horse, but Merlin points out that to truly work on himself, he must bear the responsibility of bearing his own armor and walking the path himself; friends and allies cannot bear this responsibility for him.
As the knight climbs the Path of Truth to the Summit of Truth, he slowly realizes the unfair position he put his family in. He also gains a new understanding of how friends and family can play supportive roles along his journey. In the end, the text highlights how integral the support of family and friends is on a journey of personal growth while also cautioning that some parts of the journey—and the burdens involved in them—must be undertaken alone.
The Importance of Introspection for Self-Improvement
While the support of family and friends is important for growth and often vital for survival, The Knight in Rusty Armor stresses that some aspects of self-improvement can and should be accomplished alone. Self-improvement requires a serious and often difficult accounting of one’s interpersonal failures and responsibilities, a task that can often only be accomplished through individual reflection.
As the narrative begins, the knight shows a long-standing pattern of avoiding contemplation about himself. Previously, the knight purposely dodged moments that might lead to introspection, riding “off into battle frequently” at “the mere mention of a crusade” (1). Constantly being on the go and trying to prove his valor through his deeds prevent the knight from slowing down, becoming introspective, and assessing the consequences of his behavior. When he isn’t riding into battle, he “usually delivered monologues on his exploits” (2-3). This, too, is an example of the knight’s penchant for avoiding introspection, instead bragging about his supposedly “great” deeds. This emotional distance and lack of self-awareness begin to drive his family away, illustrating the impact such a lack of introspection can have on one’s relationships.
The knight faces the Castle of Silence first because the ability to embrace silence and introspection is a necessary first step toward growth and improvement. Being able to critically assess one’s behavior allows one to move forward, holding oneself accountable for any harm one causes and adjusting one’s behavior as necessary. In the Castle of Silence, the knight meets the king, who tells him why introspection is vital for learning self-assessment and self-improvement. He says that “[b]eing quiet is more than not talking” and helps the knight understand why it is important to be alone with one’s thoughts (35). Being quiet with another person would not fulfill the introspection the knight needs, because with another person he can’t “let down [his] barriers and allow either [himself] or the other person to see what [he] was trying to hide” (35). The knight must achieve true “quiet” to shed the barriers, or “armor,” he’s built up over the years.
Achieving true quiet and an introspective state allows the knight to assess his memories and come to realizations that lead to growth and personal development. For instance, he realizes that he has “always been afraid to be alone” (38). Constantly surrounding himself with narratives of his great deeds, which solicit praise from others, prevents him from being introspective enough to acknowledge his fears. Once the knight learns what “quiet” can provide him, he uses this to gain self-knowledge, coming to a new understanding about his avoidance of being alone. He can use this newfound understanding of himself to conquer fear and doubt and begin the process of healing his relationships. Through his journey, the text argues that developing quiet and introspection is the first step in this lifelong process of bettering oneself.
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