The Lost Daughter

Gather initial thoughts and broad opinions about the book.

1. What did you make of Leda’s confession that she felt “miraculously unfettered” when her daughters moved away? How did this opening admission shape your expectations for the rest of the novel? If you’ve read Ferrante’s Neapolitan Quartet, did the exploration of maternal ambivalence here remind you of themes in those novels?

2. The novel begins with Leda’s car accident and then moves backward to explain how she got there. How effective did you find this approach in building suspense and understanding Leda’s psychological state?

3. The novel tackles the taboo subject of mothers who don’t naturally embrace motherhood. How comfortable or uncomfortable did the book make you feel, and what do you think Ferrante was trying to achieve by centering such a provocative topic? How does this novel compare to others that deal with motherhood’s “dark” side, like Rachel Yoder’s Nightbitch?

Encourage readers to connect the book’s themes and characters with their personal experiences.

1. Leda describes feeling pressure from “popular beliefs” about having children and questions whether her desire for motherhood was truly her own. Have you ever felt caught between your genuine desires and what society expects of you?

2. Leda struggles to break free from repeating her mother’s mistakes. What patterns (positive or negative) have been passed down in your family, and how have you navigated them?

3. Throughout the novel, Leda feels torn between being seen as an individual and being defined by her role as a mother. Think about the various roles you play in life. Have you ever struggled with feeling like people only see you through one particular lens rather than as a complete person?

4. Education and “proper” language become Leda’s pathway out of the poverty and limitations of her childhood. Looking at your own life, what has served as your means of social mobility or personal transformation?

5. The novel suggests that the past continually influences the present in ways we might not fully understand. Have you found certain memories or experiences from your past surfacing unexpectedly during particular life moments?

Encourage readers to connect the book’s themes and characters with their broader cultural understanding.

1. Why do you think maternal ambivalence remains such a taboo subject? What cultural or social forces do you think maintain this silence around the more difficult aspects of motherhood?

2. Leda sees “proper Italian” and academic achievement as her escape route from Naples, but she never fully sheds her origins. What does this suggest about our ability to transcend our backgrounds? How does the novel’s exploration of class differences through language and education resonate with contemporary discussions about social mobility? 

3. The novel presents motherhood as potentially limiting women’s other ambitions and identities. How do these tensions reflect current conversations about work-life balance, career fulfillment, and family expectations?

Dive into the book’s structure, characters, themes, and symbolism.

1. What significance does Elena’s doll hold throughout the story? How does this object transform from a simple toy into something that represents the complexities of mother-daughter relationships? Why do you think Leda becomes so fixated on possessing it?

2. Ferrante uses a recurring motif of rotting and decay, from the spoiled fruit in Leda’s apartment to the dirty water inside the doll. How does this imagery reinforce the gap between idealized motherhood and the messy reality?

3. The novel moves fluidly between past and present Leda’s encounters with Nina and her family trigger memories. How does this narrative structure mirror the way trauma and unresolved emotions can collapse the boundaries between different time periods in psychological experience?

4. Language serves as both a marker of class and a source of identity throughout the novel. How does the tension between Neapolitan dialect and “proper” Italian reflect broader ideas about authenticity, belonging, and the possibility of reinventing oneself?

5. Nina appears to be everything Leda wishes she could have been as a young mother yet gradually reveals her own struggles with maternal ambivalence. How does Ferrante use Nina’s character to complicate simple notions of “good” and “bad” mothers?

6. What do you make of Leda’s final declaration that she’s “dead, but […] fine” (140)? How does this paradoxical statement capture her journey throughout the novel and her ultimate relationship with motherhood and identity?

Encourage imaginative and creative connections to the book.

1. Picture the novel told from Nina’s perspective instead of Leda’s. How might the story change if the events were shown through the eyes of the young mother struggling with her own ambivalence while dealing with this strange woman who has stolen her daughter’s doll?

2. The novel ends with Leda’s stabbing and her cryptic phone call to her daughters, but the aftermath is not revealed. Where do you envision Leda’s story going from here, and how do you think her relationship with Bianca and Marta might evolve after this experience?