The Rainbow Comes and Goes: A Mother and Son on Life, Love, and Loss

Cooper and Vanderbilt’s conversation helps them know each other better, strengthening their bond. How are Cooper and Vanderbilt similar? How are they different? How do these realizations strengthen their parent-child relationship, and is Cooper ultimately more like his mother or his father?

Cooper and Vanderbilt both suffered the loss of a father at a young age. How have they dealt with this loss in similar and different ways? How does gender affect these different methods of handling grief?

Vanderbilt struggled with identity and belonging throughout her life. How did starting a family with Wyatt and beginning her design career in her adult life help give her confidence in herself as a person and as a parent?

How does the historical context Cooper gives about the Vanderbilt family support the themes of the memoir? How does the Vanderbilt legacy affect Vanderbilt’s and Cooper’s relationships with their families and each other?

How did the lack of male figures in Vanderbilt’s early life impact her relationship with men? What role does gender play within the memoir?

What role did Naney, Dodo, and Vanderbilt’s mother play in Vanderbilt’s upbringing? How did their actions affect her choices later in life?

How did Vanderbilt’s passion for beauty in her youth foreshadow and lead to her art and design career? How did it shape her physical and spiritual outlook on life and loss in her later years?

Naney was a complicated figure in Vanderbilt’s life. In what ways did her obsession with wealth and social status affect Vanderbilt’s relationship with her? What were the long-term effects of these traits on Vanderbilt?