The Survivor Wants to Die at the End

That afternoon, Alano gets a lecture from his father about leaving the house alone. Joaquin fires Dane for not protecting Alano. Alano explains that he saved a boy’s life, but he doesn’t reveal Paz’s name to his parents. He then creates more controversy when he announces that he deactivated his Death-Cast account. Joaquin fears that if this news gets out, it will be used to the advantage of pro-naturalist politicians.

After Joaquin storms out, Alano’s mother, Naya, explains her concerns about her son’s mental health. The strain of Alano’s job, the herald disaster, and the physical attack might be taking a toll that will lead to a mental health crisis. She is also worried about the mental stability of Alano’s mystery boy and warns him that he may not be able to save him.

Paz and Alano exchange texts early in the morning, and Paz eagerly waits for Alano to contact him about their evening plans. He spends the day cleaning house and fixing up his mother’s garden. He tries to reach Present-Time Gifts to cancel his End Day order, but the shop is closed pending repairs. He spends the rest of the day looking up Alano’s profile online.

Alano is waiting to get permission to go out when he receives an unexpected visit from Rio. His best friend flew out to see him, but Joaquin won’t allow house guests while the family is vulnerable to attacks from Death Guarders.

Alano vents to Rio about Ariana’s insensitive behavior and then tells his friend about Paz. Rio watched the documentary that covered Paz’s story, and he doubts the boy’s mental stability. Rio bought two tickets to the Universal Studios tour and invites Alano to go with him the following day. After Rio leaves, Alano’s thoughts turn to his evening with Paz. He says, “All I know is that I’m finally getting excited about the future again, and I’m dreading my father getting in the way of that” (326).

Paz still hasn’t heard from Alano by early evening, and his good mood is dipping into depression. He begins to lose the hope he felt the night before.

The point of view shifts to Alano’s father. Joaquin is on the phone with the president, discussing the implications for Death-Cast if Carson Dunst wins the next election. Joaquin quit drinking months earlier but eyes his liquor cart longingly. He feels haunted by those whom Death-Cast has failed, especially the Death’s Dozen.

After the phone call ends, Alano arrives to tell his father he’s going to see Paz again that evening. He demands that Dane be reinstated as his bodyguard. His father agrees but says that Dane must accompany the boy on his date and follow in a separate vehicle.

At nearly six o’clock, Paz reaches for his knife, intending to cut himself again to relieve his emotional turmoil. At that moment, Alano calls him. He says he will drive by shortly to pick up Paz, but that his father stipulated that he needs to be home by midnight.

The point of view shifts to Paz’s mother. She thinks about her disastrous first marriage and her happiness with Rolando. She worries about paying the bills during maternity leave while Rolando looks for full-time work. She worries even more about Paz’s mental state. However, she notes that Paz is genuinely happy as he walks out to meet Alano. Though hopeful, she worries that Alano will break Paz’s heart.

Paz is thrilled to be back with Alano, though he is taken aback by Dane, who is very serious and constantly on the alert for danger. Alano says that he read up on borderline personality disorder so he would better know how to help Paz. Paz worries about the emotional consequences of falling in love with Alano.

Alano ponders the best way to be a friend to someone with Paz’s condition. He concludes, “The best way to be a friend to someone with borderline personality disorder is to simply be a good friend” (356).

The boys go to Santa Monica Pier, where they find a shop called Make-a-Moment. This virtual-reality business caters to people who want a thrilling experience without risk. Alano notices that the shop is hiring actors to role-play with the customers, and he talks Paz into auditioning for a job. The owner watches as the boys play out a first-date scenario. This requires very little acting on Paz’s part as he shares a very real conversation with Alano that allows them to get to know each other better. At the end, the owner immediately asks Paz to fill out an application.

After their role play, the boys walk to the end of the pier to watch the sun set. Each one talks about the good and bad memories they have of their fathers.

Paz and Alano decide to ride the Ferris wheel. At the apex, Paz is struck by Alano’s eye color: One is green and the other brown. Alano compares Paz’s light brown eyes to the color of a cymbidium orchid. The boys are about to kiss when the wheel starts moving downward. Paz wants to keep living because of Alano.

Paz, Alano, and Dane arrive back at Paz’s house to part for the evening when Paz notices that the bandage on Alano’s arm needs changing. He suggests going inside to dress the wound. Dane insists that he must inspect the house before they can proceed.

Paz’s family happily submits to the search. When Dane gets to Paz’s room, the boy remembers that he still has a knife concealed inside his journal. He distracts the bodyguard, who fails to notice the weapon and clears both boys to enter.

Paz dresses Alano’s arm wound. His shock at the harm someone caused to Alano’s body gives him a new perspective on his own habitual self-harm. Paz keeps the Begin Day bandage contract that they both signed the night before. He then moves on to rewrap the stitches in Alano’s abdomen.

Because Alano hints that Paz’s room could use some decorative touches, Paz suggests going to a local flea market the following morning. Even though Alano is supposed to meet Rio at 11, he agrees to visit the flea market first with Paz. That night, for the first time, Paz doesn’t lie awake waiting for Death-Cast to call.

The next morning, the boys enjoy finding gifts for each other at the flea market. Paz gives Alano a vase, and Alano finds a throw rug with a big yellow star on it. This will remind Paz that his own Walk of Fame star is yet to come. Alano asks Paz to go on the Universal Studios tour with him, and Paz agrees.

When they reach the Universal lot, Paz is worried about being recognized and also worried that Rio won’t want him tagging along. He’s dismayed when he sees that Rio is breathtakingly handsome. Even though the initial meeting goes well, Paz begins to obsess over Alano’s past relationship with Rio, wondering if they were more than just friends. Alano notes Paz withdrawing and tries to ground him.

Alano is happy to see Rio and Paz getting along. While Paz steps away for a few minutes, Rio says that he watched the documentary about Death’s Dozen, featuring Paz’s murder trial. He tells Alano that Paz might be dangerous.

Paz begins to feel triggered when the group approaches the Milagro Castle exhibit, based on the wizarding movie franchise in which Paz appeared. He must act as their tour guide, which forces him to relive his glory days as an actor right before everything in his life fell apart.

Paz notices how often Alano and Rio touch and becomes jealous.

The group stops at a restaurant. During their conversation, Alano reveals to Rio that he quit Death-Cast. For his part, Rio announces that he did the same a month earlier. Now, Alano feels betrayed at being kept out of the loop. They start talking about the pros and cons of Death-Cast. Rio credits Death-Cast for giving him a chance to say goodbye to his brother, but he also blames Death-Cast for his brother’s death.

Because Lucio was the first victim of the Death-Cast serial killer who posed as a Last Friend, Alano and Rio get into an argument about the ethics of Death-Cast. Rio even says he will vote for Carson Dunst in the next election.

Paz becomes more irritated with Rio by the minute: “I’m not about to sit here saying nothing while Rio is hyping up radical pro-naturalism as if those people didn’t screw up my life” (461). The two boys trade barbed insults, with Rio insinuating that Paz is a killer. Alano tries to intervene, but Paz gets up to leave before he comes to blows with Rio.

Dane ushers the entire group outside. Alano tries to calm Paz down, fearful that he might spiral into suicidal ideation again. Paz leaves, and Rio wishes him good riddance, but Alano follows him through the park.

Alano catches up with Paz, begging him to stop and talk. Paz confesses that he has strong feelings for Alano, and Alano tells Paz that he hopes the two will have a future together. Paz wants to believe but remains suspicious of Alano’s past with Rio.

Alano admits that he was in love with Rio years earlier, but his feelings weren’t returned. However, they have been on intimate terms quite recently. Paz is now convinced that Alano isn’t over Rio and that the two will move in together, leaving Paz out in the cold. Unable to control his temper, Paz raises his fist and sees Alano flinch. He is horrified as he imagines himself turning into his father. He runs away, wondering how he will survive without Alano.