Tough Guy

On his train ride home, Fabian Salah is surrounded by hockey fans. His parents and sisters are avid hockey supporters, but Fabian has always hated the sport. When a little girl engages him in conversation, he feels a bit better, but her mother soon pulls her away from him; Fabian fears that it’s because he’s wearing nail polish and eyeliner.

Fabian feels relieved when he returns home. His apartment is tiny, but he loves living alone. He just broke up with his boyfriend Claude last night, but he feels much better now. He tells himself that this is a new chapter.

Meanwhile, Ryan stays at home alone, watching pornography and masturbating. He hates his body and resents his anxiety medication for lowering his libido. Ryan has been out as gay for some time but is still shy about his sexuality in general. He briefly reflects on a failed former relationship and gets lost in thought while imagining his perfect guy. Unaroused and irritated, Ryan gives up trying to pleasure himself.

Fabian works a shift at Savers Drug Mart. The store is dead, so he checks out new makeup brands to occupy himself. Then, a tall, muscular man with a beard enters the store. Fabian is shocked to discover that it is Ryan Price. When the two were in high school, Fabian’s family used to host hockey players at their home; Ryan was one of them, and the two grew close. He was different from any of the other players they hosted. He is surprised now when Ryan recognizes him, too. Ryan explains that he recently moved to Toronto to play for the Toronto Guardians; Fabian tells Ryan about his burgeoning singer-songwriter career and his upcoming show at the Lighthouse in the Village. He is surprised to hear that Ryan lives in this part of town, too. They say goodbye and part ways.

Ryan is overcome by anxiety on the flight to his next game. He hates flying and always feels as if he is on the verge of a panic attack. He clutches his favorite book, Anne of Green Gables; texts his sister, Colleen; and tries to mentally reassure himself. Then, Wyatt takes the seat next to him and engages him in conversation. Ryan is thankful for the distraction. Finally, after a successful takeoff, the two more calmly discuss their lives.

For the rest of the flight, Ryan replays his encounter with Fabian at the pharmacy. He remembers how close they were as teenagers. He particularly recalls an evening they spent on a boat in Nova Scotia, where Ryan was sure that Fabian wanted to kiss him. Ryan was taken by Fabian’s confidence then and was struck by his beauty when he saw him at the pharmacy. He wonders if he should attend Fabian’s show but then dismisses the idea, telling himself that he’s “losing his mind” (34).

The night after Halloween, Fabian wakes up next to Claude again. He curses himself for sleeping with him after just breaking up with him. They ran into each other at a Halloween party, and Fabian agreed to take him home—still caught up in confusing thoughts after seeing Ryan again. He urges Claude to go, insisting that he can’t keep having sex with him.

Afterward, Fabian attends “Bargain Brunch” with his friends Vanessa, Marcus, and Tarek. Bargain Brunch is their cheap, at-home breakfast tradition where they eat frozen waffles, wear face masks, and gossip. Everyone is horrified to hear that Fabian slept with Claude again. They remind him that he can do better and deserves more. Fabian considers telling them about Ryan but decides against it.

Ryan plays another game. He is forced to fight other players to punish them for their penalties. Everyone in the stands chants Ryan’s designated slogan, “Pay. The. Price” (45), which Ryan hates. He goes to sit in the penalty box, where he chats with the box attendant about the game. Afterward, Ryan’s teammates congratulate him on his fight. Wyatt invites him to join the team for drinks. Ryan appreciates Wyatt’s kindness but feels socially awkward and declines. Instead, he heads out to the Lighthouse to catch Fabian’s show.

At the Lighthouse, Ryan stands against the back wall and watches Fabian perform. He takes note of Fabian’s sexy outfit and confident manner. He is impressed by Fabian’s violin playing and singing, too.

Afterward, Ryan feels uncomfortable approaching Fabian. Just when Fabian is finally standing alone, Ryan moves to approach him, but an attractive man swoops in and hugs Fabian. Ryan feels ashamed of himself for assuming that Fabian was single and chastises himself for coming at all. Then, Fabian turns and notices Ryan, inviting him over and introducing the man who hugged him as his friend Tarek. Vanessa joins them and meets Ryan, too. While Vaness and Tarek are ordering drinks, Fabian and Ryan chat. Fabian talks about his music, and Ryan lightly alludes to hockey. Then, Fabian’s friends return and probe Ryan with questions. Fabian remarks again on Ryan’s decision to move to the Village; Ryan bluntly states that he is gay, shocking and delighting Fabian. He reflects on how different Ryan always was and how attracted he was to him years prior. Tarek and Vanessa make plans to leave, but Ryan offers to stick around and help Fabian carry his gear home. Before leaving, Vanessa teases Fabian about sleeping with Ryan; Fabian insists that he’d never have sex with a hockey player, unaware that Ryan is right behind him.