45 pages 1 hour read

Priya Parker

The Art of Gathering

Nonfiction | Book | Adult | Published in 2018

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Chapter 4Chapter Summaries & Analyses

Chapter 4 Summary: “Create a Temporary Alternative World”

Echoing Parker’s earlier assertion that the well-defined purpose of a gathering must articulate its uniqueness, Chapter 4 stresses ways in which events can meaningfully set themselves apart from the rest of the world. Above all, setting certain guidelines or rules in place for the gathering will facilitate this goal. Parker elaborates on the trend of “pop-up rules,” or policies that are explicitly applied to the gathering only (118). For instance, the Influencer Salon at the House of Genius in Boulder, Colorado, differs from standard networking events by instituting a rule that participants cannot reveal their last names, job titles, employers, and other professional information. It also insists that participants speak to their whole table, not just to the person next to them. These rules are intended to foster a collaborative, egalitarian spirit.

Parker distinguishes between pop-up rules and etiquette, or what she calls “How Old Rich People Want You to Behave” (116). Etiquette, Parker argues, applies to closed, homogenous groups, is always fixed, and is instilled in culture as part of rigid traditions. Pop-up rules, on the other hand, are meant for diverse groups, in specific and limited settings, and can be quite distinct from expectations of everyday behavior.