42 pages 1 hour read

Deesha Philyaw

The Secret Lives of Church Ladies

Fiction | Short Story Collection | Adult | Published in 2020

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Story 8Chapter Summaries & Analyses

Story 8 Summary: “Instructions for Married Christian Husbands”

This is a list of instructions for married Christian husbands when they cheat on their wives. It is written from the point of view of the woman who they will be sleeping with, who is very direct and pragmatic about the sexual relationship they are about to have. She says that what turns her on is the fact that the man wants her when he has so many reasons why he shouldn’t.

She gives instruction about parking, social media, health and wellness, religion, “your wife,” money, sex, “your conscience,” substances, travel, therapy, arrival, foreplay, fantasies, feelings, and departure. The “about me” section describes the woman as having no children, never been married, and owns a bakery. 

Story 8 Analysis

This is a story of taking control of sexual experience. While women are stereotypically the ones being pursued by men when it comes to sex, this short story turns that stereotype on its head and shows that women also have sexual preferences and can take control when it comes to sex. In this story, sex is power; the woman is making all of the rules and boundaries about the sexual experience she is about to have.