Audre & Bash are Just Friends

The Mercy family motto functions as a motif representing Navigating the Pressure of Family Expectations. At various points in the novel, Audre recites the motto when she’s thinking about her mother and grandmother’s achievements, particularly when she feels inadequate by comparison: When Reshma tells Audre, “You don’t have to act perfect all the time, babe,” Audre replies, “Yes, I do,” thinking to herself, “Mercy girls do what can’t be done” (62). However, the original family motto that Grandma Lizette taught to Eva was that “Mercy girls are cursed” (328), referring to the Mercier women’s struggles and the absence of Audre’s grandfather, great-grandfather, and great-great-grandfather. 

Eva rewrote the motto and concealed the painful and complicated aspects of the family’s history because she “wanted the past to give [Audre] strength instead of weighing [her] down” (328). Despite Eva’s good intentions, the family motto becomes a motif of the enormous pressure Audre feels because of her family’s high expectations. After learning the truth about her family’s past, Audre experiences disillusionment and betrayal at how she has practiced damaging patterns of behavior in an attempt to live up to a mythical standard: “I bury everything down to please some ‘Mercy girl’ ideal that doesn’t even exist. It’s not even our real last name!” (296). Audre’s evolving relationship with the Mercy family motto demonstrates how she shifts from striving to live up to the lofty expectations set by her mother to resisting the pressures her family places upon her.

The number 333 symbolizes Bash’s love and care for Audre. He demonstrates these qualities when he researches panic attacks and suggests that she use the 333 method, a grounding technique in which a person with anxiety focuses on “something u can see, hear, and touch” (210). Later in the novel, this symbol gains prominence when Audre asks Bash to tattoo the number 333 on her wrist. Her decision to have the number permanently inked on her skin signifies that she wants to remember Bash’s love forever, no matter how their relationship may change over time. 

Eva’s opposition to the tattoo has a major impact on the novel’s love story, structure, and Audre’s relationship with her mother. Instead of recognizing the love that the tattoo represents, Eva initially sees it as proof that Bash is a bad influence, prompting her to demand that her daughter dump him. The tattoo of the number 333 is mentioned during the novel’s happy ending when Eva tells her daughter, “I hate your tattoo. But I love you” (363). Eva and Bash’s shared care for Audre’s well-being and happiness changes her stance on him, reinforcing the number 333’s symbolic significance.