54 pages • 1-hour read
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Content Warning: This section of the guide includes discussion of death, animal death, sexual violence, mental illness, and sexual content.
Saul reflects on his deteriorating sexual relationship with Miriam. She initiates aggressive encounters while he sleeps and often continues when he says no, leaving him feeling ashamed and divided. In a dream, Miriam painlessly removes his penis; he feels relief. After a tense confrontation culminates in Saul forcing himself on an unresponsive Miriam, he feels sick with himself. He begins sleeping in his study, keeping this change hidden from the children.
Aaron commits to the four precepts of Kṛṣṇa consciousness: no gambling, intoxicants, illicit sex, or meat. At dinner, he announces his vegetarianism, falsely attributing it to his friend Charlie. Eliza recognizes the lie but stays silent. After Chali explains that illicit sex includes masturbation, Aaron vows complete abstinence.
At the ISKCON temple, Aaron fantasizes about marrying the guru’s daughter. Inspired, he participates in kirtan for the first time. When she hands him a tambourine, he experiences what he understands as pure spiritual ecstasy.
Miriam feels drawn to a nearby house but is interrupted by Madge Turner, an acquaintance from Aaron’s Scout days. Miriam fabricates an excuse and leaves. She attempts to return to shoplifting but finds the mall alienating. She thoughtlessly steals a shoe, throws it away, and realizes that her store days are over.
School ends. Saul and Eliza celebrate her honor roll by secretly devouring an entire cake. They spend the summer in daily study. Eliza successfully completes all 720 permutations of “mantle” in a trance-like state. Saul explains Abraham Abulafia, a 13th-century Jewish mystic who developed techniques for achieving shefa, which he describes as a form of divine influx or communion. He tells Eliza that she possesses Abulafia’s rare gift and that winning nationals will prove she is ready. He gives her a translated version of The Hidden Eden.
When Saul has Eliza express vowel sounds through movement, she spontaneously performs the exact head rotation that Abulafia prescribes in The Light of the Intellect, a book she has never seen. Stunned, Saul realizes that her gift is genuine. Eliza begins to consider accessing the advanced texts in secret.
Aaron fabricates a camping trip to spend a weekend at the temple. There, he finally feels at home. Chali explains that after six months, Aaron can receive initiation and a spiritual name.
Late one night, Miriam drives to a house in a planned community. After opening the garage door, she is attacked by a dog and hits her head. She escapes as a light comes on. Aaron dreams that the deity Kṛṣṇa speaks the Hebrew Shema in Saul’s voice, confirming for him that his new faith doesn’t contradict his earlier beliefs.
Following the night of the dog attack, Miriam wakes late and comes downstairs in her nightgown, her hair unbrushed. Saul tries to embrace her; she is unresponsive. Eliza realizes that her parents no longer sleep together.
While Saul conducts a bar mitzvah lesson, Eliza secretly borrows The Light of the Intellect and begins practicing Abulafia’s instructions for chanting Adonai.
Miriam is drawn to an abandoned house. Inside, she finds squalor, including a dead dog, and a Polaroid of a girl to whom she feels an unexplained sense of connection. She takes it. In her car, the accumulated smells and sights overwhelm her, and she vomits.
Saul greets Aaron at the door, mentioning a planned family dinner. Eliza suggests that they go outside. At their childhood meeting spot, a fallen log in the yard, Eliza tells Aaron that she thinks their parents are no longer sleeping together. Aaron confesses that he wasn’t camping but at a religious place. Eliza promises to keep his secret.
Miriam arrives home disheveled, dirty, and smelling of garbage. After seeing her reflection in a mirror, she is horrified and runs upstairs, with Saul following. Left alone, Eliza and Aaron wordlessly clean the entire kitchen, falling into the rhythm of their old sibling unity.
Later, Eliza asks to sleep in Aaron’s room. They lie back-to-back. Aaron tells her to be glad for him. Saul holds Miriam all night as she lies still. She has a nightmare about the abandoned house and sees what she believes are her dead parents inside it.
The next morning, Eliza hears Aaron chanting in his room and recognizes it as something they secretly share. A new school year begins. Eliza is in Ms. Paul’s sixth-grade class. Her focus on letters causes trouble; she has difficulty reading aloud, and she meets with the school psychologist after the school becomes concerned about her difficulty separating reality from imagination.
Over the fall and winter, Aaron uses school clubs as cover for his temple time. The family settles into a tense routine. One evening, the phone rings during dinner. Saul learns that Miriam has been arrested and leaves Eliza home alone for the first time. To cope with her fear, Eliza recites Abulafia’s instructions in her room, finding comfort in his imagined voice.
A police sergeant tells Saul that Miriam was found in a stranger’s house in Jenkintown, holding a vase. He takes Saul to a U-Store-It facility and opens a unit that Miriam has rented for 18 years. Inside, Saul finds a vast, intricate installation of stolen objects arranged in complex, highly ordered patterns. He is awed and overwhelmed, realizing that the space is interactive as suspended objects respond to his movement. The sergeant tells Saul that Miriam called it her “kaleidoscope.”
Saul returns home to find Eliza asleep on her floor. Under Miriam’s side of the bed, he finds a box containing a pink rubber ball from her childhood. He discovers that Aaron left a message; when the operator connects him to the last caller, a man answers with the Hare Kṛṣṇa chant.
The next morning, Saul tells Eliza that Miriam is in the hospital because she was sick and confused. At Miriam’s arraignment, she doesn’t speak and communicates only through her lawyer. She is committed to the Holliswood Center for psychiatric observation.
Saul goes to Aaron’s high school but learns that he’s absent. Lacking a last name for Charlie, Saul pretends to remember that Charlie’s parents were taking Aaron to visit Miriam. He then leaves, reassuring himself that Aaron is safe and will return home.
Eliza concludes that her parents are getting a divorce and that “sick” is a code word. She resolves to play along, believing that this explanation makes the situation easier to manage.
Saul visits Miriam at the Holliswood Center. In the day room, Miriam is unnervingly still. She tells Saul that she’s not drugged and confirms that she was in a stranger’s house. She asks if the police showed him her kaleidoscope and explains her actions as Tikkun Olam, an idea she got from him years ago. Saul gives her the box with the rubber ball. Upon seeing its scuffs, Miriam becomes aggravated, demands that he leave, and is escorted back to her room.
Saul sits Eliza down and explains the truth: Miriam has a mental illness, has been stealing for years, and was arrested. Eliza asks if her mother is a burglar in a “loony bin.” Saul rejects this language and explains that mental illness as a medical condition affecting the mind.
That night, Aaron calls. He explains that his friend is actually Chali and that he has been spending time at the ISKCON temple. He says that he doesn’t want to come home. After threatening to call the police, Saul convinces Aaron to give him the address. From her room, Eliza overhears their argument about cults and brainwashing, as well as Aaron’s insistence that he intends to continue his involvement.
Eliza finds Aaron in an orange robe. He warns her to make sure that her spelling is what she wants, not just what Saul wants, cautioning her against being influenced without questioning it.
Saul learns that Miriam hasn’t worked in 10 years and that the family has been living off a trust. He resolves to read Aaron’s books and talk with him nightly, determined to prevent further distance between them.
At breakfast the next morning, Saul prepares a meal and encourages a sense of routine, while Aaron maintains his new practices. That evening, Aaron cooks a meal for the family according to his religious guidelines, but the food is poorly prepared. When Saul questions it, Aaron becomes defensive and retreats to his room.
Eliza secretly borrows The Life of the Future World from Saul’s study and begins practicing Abulafia’s final techniques on her own. She copies the 72 letter triplets of God’s name, each requiring specific vowels, head movements, and breathing patterns. Meanwhile, a tense routine settles over the household. Saul lets Aaron go to the ISKCON temple on weekends and keeps weekly hospital reports on Miriam hidden under the bed. Eliza memorizes the triplets to the tune of “Oh, Susannah” and begins losing sleep, her mind racing with persistent, repetitive thoughts. During one dinner argument, Saul discovers Aaron chanting on japa beads and confiscates them.
Spelling-bee season begins. Saul gets permission to attend the class bee. The night before, Aaron accuses Saul of lying, claiming that Miriam simply left them. Enraged, Saul reveals that Miriam has been stealing for years and is now under psychiatric care, speaking harshly about her behavior and criticizing Aaron’s beliefs. Eliza screams for him to stop. Aaron slaps Saul and runs from the room.
Upset, Eliza takes The Life of the Future World to her room. She begins permuting the Hebrew word for “light.” The pen drops from her hand. She loses physical control, experiencing an overwhelming torrent of words, intense bodily sensations, and rapid, shifting images of a vast shape. As the experience continues, she chants the first triplets of God’s name and feels a strong expansion of awareness. For a brief moment, she sees the face of the shape, which contains every face that ever was, with pain and pleasure becoming impossible to distinguish. The experience ends abruptly as she contracts back toward her body.
The next morning, she wakes on the floor, sore, in clothes smelling of urine. At the class bee, when given the word “origami,” it prompts an image of unfolding. Eliza deliberately misspells it, and Saul covers his mouth in shock. The teacher asks if she is sure; Eliza nods.
These chapters bring the theme of Individual Searches for Meaning and Emotional Distance to a point of intensification, as Miriam’s increasing involvement in burglary culminates in the revelation of her long-standing collection of stolen objects, which reflects how her search for order is organized through external accumulation. For years, Miriam has understood her actions as a private pursuit of Tikkun Olam, attempting to repair her internal dislocations by accumulating objects she associates with restoration and arrangement. The discovery of her storage unit, referred to as a “kaleidoscope,” reveals a highly structured system in which objects are arranged in complex patterns that respond to movement, indicating a long-standing, privately maintained framework that has developed outside family interaction. This emphasis on controlled arrangement is further evident during Saul’s visit to the Holliswood Center, where he brings her the treasured pink rubber ball from her childhood. When Miriam notices the ball’s scuff marks, she rejects the object and her husband, demanding that he leave. Her response indicates that her system of order cannot accommodate alteration, limiting her ability to engage with others within shared, unpredictable contexts and contributing to her increasing separation from the family.
Aaron’s trajectory parallels Miriam’s retreat into a private spiritual realm, directly advancing the theme of Expectations and Family Breakdown through his increasing commitment to an alternative religious community. Stripped of his father’s attention following Eliza’s spelling success, Aaron finds refuge and validation in ISKCON. His immersion in this late-20th-century alternative religious movement provides the emotional acceptance he once received from his father during their guitar sessions in the study. Aaron adopts the movement’s four precepts, committing to vegetarianism and celibacy and abstaining from gambling and intoxicants. He conceals his participation from his parents, limiting this practice to spaces outside the home. This system provides a consistent framework for his engagement, but his adherence to its precepts requires ongoing concealment at home, reducing opportunities for shared interaction within the family.
Tension between Aaron’s practices and Saul’s expectations become explicit during a confrontation at home. When Saul discovers Aaron’s japa beads and dismisses his practices and equates them with Miriam’s behavior, he rejects Aaron’s attempt to organize his experience through this system. The confrontation escalates physically, marking a breakdown in their interaction and highlighting how parental expectations shape the conditions under which engagement within the household occurs, limiting sustained connection.
Concurrently, the symbol of Saul’s study solidifies its role as an incubator for esoteric obsession, filtering the motif of spelling and letters through the lens of Abraham Abulafia’s 13th-century Jewish mysticism and transforming Eliza’s linguistic talent into a vehicle for accessing shefa, or divine communion. Following the National Bee defeat, Saul concludes that Eliza possesses Abulafia’s rare gift for achieving transcendence through letter permutation. Their study sessions become increasingly structured around repetitive and embodied exercises drawn from texts. This dynamic develops the theme of Language Without Communication. These practices organize language into controlled and abstract forms that remain internalized, limiting opportunities for direct interpersonal exchange between father and daughter. Saul’s engagement with Eliza becomes oriented toward sustaining these practices, shaping how he interacts with her within this space. The increasing abstraction of language within the study coincides with reduced engagement with the changing conditions of the family outside it.
The intense pressure on Eliza culminates in independent engagement with the practices introduced by Saul, through which she begins to exercise control over how these practices are used. Eliza retreats to her room with Abulafia’s Life of the Future World and begins permuting the Hebrew word for “light” without her father’s supervision or guidance. This practice produces an intense and disorienting sensory experience that exceeds the controlled structure previously maintained within their study sessions, changing how she engages with these practices. In the subsequent spelling bee, her deliberate misspelling reflects this shift and indicates a controlled decision. This decision changes how her ability is used within the framework established by her father, showing that it is no longer fully organized through his interpretive approach.



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