How to Giggle: A Guide to Taking Life Less Seriously

Berner and DeSorbo redefine “delusion,” framing it as a positive form of dreaming, imagining, and manifesting ambitious goals that society might discourage women from pursuing. For those who feel their dreams are too impossible, the authors suggest writing lists, defining goals, and detailing action steps: A goal or dream becomes more feasible as soon as the individual translates it into accessible language. For example, someone who wants to start a business could break this into a series of smaller goals, such as drafting a business plan, securing a loan, registering the business, etc. The authors stress that delusion is a form of creative and imaginative thinking that women should value in themselves. The more delusional a woman is, the more willing she is to take risks, face her fears, and make the impossible possible.

The authors hold that being aware of others’ behavior is essential to creating lasting, reciprocal forms of connection, whether platonic, romantic, or sexual. For example, good friendships are founded on understanding, grace, and honesty, so it’s worth noting if a friend is taking advantage of one’s kindness, vulnerability, or time—for example, by asking her friend to babysit her children but never reciprocating. In heterosexual romantic relationships, women should keep an eye out for men who expect to be taken care of or who spend time with people of poor character, both of which reflect on the man’s values. In sexual relationships, women should beware of men who expect perfection in bed or can’t communicate, as sex is most enjoyable if all involved approach it with humor and grace. In an overarching sense, the authors stress that forming healthy relationships is about awareness and openness. It’s okay to recognize when a friend, boyfriend, or lover isn’t a good fit; letting go of these unhealthy relationships creates room for more positive, reciprocal forms of connection.

As the text’s title suggests, How to Giggle argues for taking life less seriously. Berner and DeSorbo acknowledge how challenging life can be: Someone might live with anxiety, be stuck in a bad relationship, or feel discouraged at work. However, laughter makes all of these challenges more tolerable. While the authors do not advocate for disregarding negative emotions or forcing happiness, they hold that laughing at oneself, letting go of fears, and being confident can help alleviate anxiety and create opportunities for self-discovery. For example, if someone says something embarrassing, they can practice laughing at the situation instead of judging themselves for it. The same principle applies to bigger or more profound struggles and setbacks: For instance, someone who misses out on a job opportunity might find humor in the inherent awkwardness of the interview process. Berner and DeSorbo encourage readers to see life as a series of bits (or comic sketches). This mindset suggests that life is a surprising, ongoing skit and that letting oneself relax, experiment, play, and giggle can make it more fun.