People can actively convey a certain message using words and “macroexpressions,” or noticeable facial expressions that last for at least four seconds. According to psychologist Paul Ekman, what people cannot control are “microexpressions”—tiny, fleeting facial expressions—which seem to be a human universal. Microexpressions are physiological reflexes that reflect people’s inner emotions; they may look just like macroexpressions but are much faster. Learning to notice microexpressions will help readers accurately read others. By paying close attention to people’s faces as they speak, one will notice if there is a discrepancy between what they are saying and their expressions. 

For example, being fidgety, avoiding eye contact, and scratching one’s nose seem to be signs of deceit. Evaluating body language is never fool-proof but offers some additional information. Moreover, body language is strongly influenced by physiological responses. King claims that “nonverbal communication is inbuilt, biological, and the result of evolution” (95). While people can try to control their bodies, their movements tend to display their true feelings. King cites scholarly research that suggests that certain gestures, like shrugging, are shared across cultures. The brain’s most primal system, the limbic system, controls movements like flight, fight, and freeze, and these fear responses are still easily observable in modern life, even in scenarios in which people’s physical survival is not necessarily at risk. 

The author lists numerous anxious behaviors such as fiddling with necklaces or ties, touching one’s forehead, or wringing one’s hands. Self-soothing gestures like touching one’s hair or massaging one’s ears reveal inner discomfort, while large exhales and self-hugging are tell-tale signs of stress. Subconsciously, people want to protect their torso, a crucial part of the body. Closed body language, in which limbs are locked or turned away, suggests negative feelings, while open and relaxed body language suggests positive feelings or confidence. King feels that this aspect of “reading people” is intuitive since everyone is inherently “fluent” in others’ actions; they just need to remember to deemphasize the verbal and pay attention to body language in detail. However, spotting lies can be difficult since the signs of lying are the same as anxiety and discomfort in general.

When assessing others, King coaches the reader to focus on behavior that deviates from a baseline and to consider a broad range of evidence. He advises to “Look for Mirroring” since people who like and agree with a person tend to mimic them (117). People’s energy is also important; their focus reveals their true interest. He reminds the reader of the dynamic nature of body language and urges them to observe the flow of gestures rather than a single tell, putting each observation in context. King argues that voice is another element of body language and that breathing, tone, and pitch hugely influence people’s communication. King concludes by reminding the reader to assess “clusters” of body language and facial expressions.

King offers a thorough assessment of facial expressions, body language, and tone of voice, grounding much of his discussion in terms of evolutionary psychology. However, King’s focus on body language largely assumes a Western lens. For instance, a previous chapter mentioned that eye contact is encouraged in America but more taboo in Japan; nevertheless, King here uses it in several examples. The variability of facial expressions both within and across cultures has led scholars such as neuroscientist Lisa Feldman Barrett (known for works like How Emotions Are Made) to argue that “reading” others’ emotions is much more difficult than most people believe (Sarwari, Khalida. “Northeastern University Professor Says We Can’t Gauge Emotions from Facial Expressions Alone.” Northeastern Global News, 19 Jul. 2019). 

Chapter Lessons

• People can fake macroexpressions but reveal their true feelings through microexpressions.
• Anxious body language can signal nervousness or lying.
• Always know how people typically behave before assessing their facial expressions and body language.
• Evaluate expressions, body movements, and voice comprehensively, looking for clusters of signs rather than single “tells.”

Reflection Questions

• Why does King believe body language is as powerful as verbal language? Do you agree?
• If there are no single tells that indicate lying, how can you assess whether someone is truthful or not? How would you apply this knowledge in your life?
• Whom would you like to understand better? How could you use these body language tips to gain insight into their moods or intentions?