Say You'll Remember Me

Content Warning: This section of the guide contains discussion of cursing, illness, child abuse, animal abuse, and death.

Gather initial thoughts and broad opinions about the book.

1. The novel opens with Xavier secretly saving a dog instead of euthanizing it and Samantha calling him an “asshole” for suggesting her kitten be put down. What did this initial encounter reveal about each character’s values and approach to life?

2. In what ways does Say You’ll Remember Me compare to Jimenez’s other novel Part of Your World, particularly in how both explore relationships across different personal circumstances?

3. Which character’s journey in this story resonated most strongly with you and why?

Encourage readers to connect the book’s themes and characters with their personal experiences.

1. Samantha believes being a “witness to someone’s life” is “the most beautiful thing” (135). Describe an experience that made you feel like a witness to someone else’s journey. What role did this person have in your life, and how did this experience impact your relationship with them?

2. Have you ever had a caregiving role, or do you know anyone who is or has been a caregiver? What coping mechanisms have you employed, or observed others employ, when facing caregiving challenges like those portrayed in the novel?

3. Have you ever sacrificed your well-being for a relationship or goal like Xavier did by working himself to exhaustion? What did you learn from the experience?

4. Do you believe cutting ties with toxic family members is sometimes healthier than seeking reconciliation, as Xavier does with his parents? Why or why not?

5. Reflect on a time when distance separated you from someone important. What methods did you use to maintain your connection?

Examine the book’s relevance to societal issues, historical events, or cultural themes.

1. What does the family’s choice to care for Lisa at home, despite the challenges, instead of placing her in a memory care facility reveal about the broader societal issues surrounding dementia care?

2. Do you think compassionate motivation ever justifies professional dishonesty, as seen in Xavier’s decision to secretly save the dog scheduled for euthanasia?

3. What limitations of technology in maintaining long-distance relationships does the novel illustrate despite Xavier and Samantha’s constant digital communication?

Dive into the book’s structure, characters, themes, and symbolism.

1. What does the contrast between Lisa’s involuntary memory loss and Xavier’s desire to forget his parents suggest about the relationship between memory and identity?

2. The discovery of the jewelry in the Dart’s hidden compartment creates a symbolic conclusion to the story. What multiple meanings might this discovery represent?

3. What causes the evolution in Xavier and Samantha’s opposing worldviews about whether people are inherently good or “assholes”?

4. The novel presents different forms of caregiving for animals, family members, and romantic partners. What distinct aspects of caring does each relationship highlight?

5. What purpose does the recurring song “Come On Eileen” serve beyond providing comic relief in Xavier and Samantha’s relationship?

Encourage imaginative and creative connections to the book.

1. If you were writing a sequel to this story, what new challenges might Xavier and Samantha face as Lisa’s condition progresses?

2. Xavier claims he would become a “worm expert” if Samantha were transformed into a worm (257). If you were to create your own metaphor for devoted caregiving that captures this level of commitment, what would it be and why?

3. Imagine you were tasked with creating a photo album of Samantha and Xavier’s progressing relationship. What pictures would be essential to include that lead up to Xavier’s proposal?

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