The Five Wishes of Mr. Murray McBride
50 pages • 1-hour read
Joe SipleThe Five Wishes of Mr. Murray McBride
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Themes
Accepting the Passage of Time
Content Warning: This section contains discussion of suicide and child death.
Many characters in The Five Wishes of Mr. Murray McBride struggle to accept the passage of time. At the age of 100, Murray has lived through a great deal of change. He remembers the past with fondness: his 80-year marriage to Jenny, his baseball career, and the politeness and respect that people used to show one another are all things he wishes he could have back. His participation in the life-drawing class further reminds him of his old age and makes him wish for a return to his youth. As the story progresses, Murray confronts the passage of time and finds his place in the modern world. In doing so, he has to move beyond certain prejudices and biases. When he first meets Jason, for instance, he is perturbed by Jason’s speech pattern and his use of slang such as “dude” and “man.” In Murray’s day, children used honorifics when talking to adults as a sign of respect; this concept is foreign to Jason. As he gets to know Jason better, however, Murray realizes that Jason has been raised with different social norms; he is not necessarily disrespectful, he simply is a child of his time, just as Murray once was.
The passage of time is closely tied to grief and loss. As much as he wishes to return to a happier past, Murray also wishes for a future in which he dies and is reunited with Jenny in the afterlife. He even means to speed up the passage of time by choosing a date to stop taking his medication. These feelings change when he meets Jason. As time goes by for Jason, he gets closer and closer to needing a new heart; without a donor, he will die. This knowledge hangs over both Murray and Jason and complicates Murray’s relationship with the passage of time. It seems deeply unfair to him that Jason should live for only 10 years while Murray has had 100. Joe Siple resolves this tension by giving Jason a triumphant, if bittersweet, ending. Murray holds on to life against all odds, defying the passage of time that should be killing him, to stay with Jason until the end. He is able to let go and die peacefully only when he knows that Jason will survive. Both Jason and Murray reconcile their difficulties with the passage of time and accept their fates with dignity and grace.
The Importance of Human Connection
After Murray’s wife, Jenny, dies, he finds himself at a loose end. Most of his friends and family are gone, and he knows that the end of his life is coming soon. He no longer sees the point in fostering connections with other people, and he has no close friends. He resists Dr. Keaton’s suggestion that he socialize and pushes Chance away when he tries to connect. He knows on some level that he should reach out to Chance, as he regrets not being closer to his sons, but he is unable to do so. His baseball career often took him away from home, and he missed out on much of their childhood. He knows that this distance “spilled right on down to the next generation” (48) and affected his own relationship with Chance. Although Murray knows that this lack of connection between fathers and sons (and grandsons) is detrimental, he does not initially believe he can do anything about it. When he meets Jason, he learns that he is capable of change.
Although Murray does not fully understand Jason at first, they start to connect, and Murray feels a “new respect for life” (103) when they are together. Jason helps Murray feel alive and connected to others for the first time in ages. As Murray meets Anna, Tiegan, Della, and Collins, he makes even more connections and learns to admire the love they show one another. He is particularly moved by Della and Tiegan’s close relationship and regrets that he never “listened to that part of [him] that wanted to [hug his] sons, just like Tiegan’s mother does, and squeeze them until they knew how much [he] cared” (147). Della and Tiegan, as well as Anna and Jason, model a new kind of family dynamic for Murray that shows him the true importance of human connection. Once he starts to internalize this message, he thinks more deeply about his relationship with Chance. He learns that Chance is not after his money or his baseball collectibles; he wants Murray’s old baseball glove because he cherishes memories of them playing baseball together when Chance was young. This realization helps Murray forgive and accept his grandson and finally tell him that he is proud of him. Ultimately, Murray finally learns the importance of being connected to other people. His doctor tells him that he is lucky to be able to “die comfortably and with dignity, surrounded by those who love [him]” (336) when he learns he has not much longer to live.
Selflessness and Sacrifice
Many characters demonstrate immense selflessness over the course of The Five Wishes of Mr. Murray McBride, most notably Tiegan. Tiegan is a steadfast and true friend to Jason, even though he does not always treat her with the same kindness. She keeps him company when he is in the hospital and joins his and Murray’s quest to fulfill Jason’s wishes. Even small gestures, such as making breakfast for Murray and Jason before they go to Wrigley Stadium, emphasize Tiegan’s selflessness. Murray also learns to act selflessly when he decides to take Jason under his wing and help him fulfill his five wishes. He even tries to insist that the doctors give his heart to Jason when he desperately needs a transplant. Murray and Tiegan stand in direct contrast to Benedict. Although Benedict says he works all the time to pay Jason’s medical bills, he is completely incapable of any emotional sacrifice that would bring him closer to his son. Instead of facing his own pain and grief at the possibility of losing his son, he hides in his work, using the bills as an excuse. Murray knows from experience that working too hard is detrimental to the parent-child relationship. He wishes he could tell Benedict what he has learned about selflessness, but they never see eye to eye.
At the end of the book, Tiegan’s death underscores the randomness of death. Della ensures that something good comes out of Tiegan’s death when she insists that her heart be donated to save Jason’s life. This gift raises difficult questions for the reader: Why should Tiegan die instead of Jason? Did God choose Jason over Tiegan? Isn’t her suffering and death just as unfair as Jason’s? Siple never answers these questions explicitly. Regardless of the conclusion, it is undeniable that Tiegan’s death has a profound effect on Jason, not just because it saved his life. When Jason dedicates his life to fulfilling Tiegan’s fifth wish, he is, in turn, extending the kindness she showed him and counteracting the randomness of her death with intentional and meaningful service. His work raising a million dollars for unhoused people brings him away from his family until he reaches this goal. He feels that he has a responsibility to fulfill Tiegan’s goal in her stead. Now that he has accomplished this, he is able to come back to his family and start living his life for himself, secure in the knowledge that he has made both Tiegan and Murray proud.
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