Linus is a forty-year-old caseworker for the Department in Charge of Magical Youth (DICOMY). He lives a solitary, highly regimented life in a dreary city, finding comfort primarily in his pet cat, Calliope, and his collection of vintage records. After seventeen years on the job, he relies heavily on the 947-page DICOMY Rules and Regulations to dictate his behavior. Despite his rigid adherence to protocol, he possesses a deep, often unrecognized capacity for compassion toward the magical children he investigates.

Arthur runs the remote orphanage on Marsyas Island, caring for six children classified by the government as extreme cases. He employs a gentle, philosophical approach to child-rearing, focusing on healing trauma rather than enforcing discipline. He dresses practically in tan shorts and high socks for island adventures and fiercely defends his charges from the prejudice of the mainland townspeople.

Lucy is a six-year-old boy officially registered by DICOMY as Lucifer, the Antichrist. Despite his terrifying classification and his tendency to make morbid, theatrical threats, he functions much like a typical child. He loves listening to mid-century music on vinyl records and suffers from intense nightmares related to his origins.

Sal is a shy teenage boy who shape-shifts into a Pomeranian whenever he is frightened or anxious. Having suffered significant abuse and instability in his past—bouncing between numerous group homes—he counts his three months on Marsyas Island as his longest placement. He is highly sensitive and finds solace in writing literature on a typewriter in his room.

Chauncey is an amorphous green blob with bright red lips, black teeth, and eyes on long stalks. Despite his monstrous appearance and unknown species classification, he is incredibly earnest and helpful. His greatest aspiration in life is to work as a professional bellhop in a hotel.

Talia is a female gnome child who sports a beard and fiercely tends to the island's garden. She is highly protective of her territory and frequently threatens to bury people she dislikes in her flower beds. Underneath her gruff exterior, she deeply cares for her fellow orphans and the beauty of the natural world.

Theodore is a wyvern—a small, winged creature resembling a dragon. He communicates entirely in a series of chirps, clicks, and trills that only a few people can interpret. He maintains a hoard beneath the living room sofa, collecting small trinkets and keepsakes that hold sentimental value.

Phee is a young forest sprite with bright red hair and delicate wings. She possesses a profound, magical connection to the vegetation on Marsyas Island. She spends much of her time with Zoe, learning how to safely harness and commune with the natural world.

Zoe, also known as Ms. Chapelwhite, is an unregistered island sprite and the caretaker of Marsyas Island. Her tremendous powers are directly linked to the island itself, allowing her to manipulate the environment. She is fiercely protective of Arthur and the children, maintaining a hostile stance toward DICOMY and its intrusive regulations.

Mr. Werner is a handsome, ambitious member of Extremely Upper Management at the Department in Charge of Magical Youth. He takes a highly vested, personal interest in the Marsyas Island orphanage, warning Linus to spare no detail and to beware of emotional manipulation during his assignment.

Helen is the owner of the mainland hardware store and the mayor of the town. While she previously allowed the town's hostility toward the orphanage to go unchecked, her interactions with the children prompt her to reconsider her stance and utilize her authority to protect them from local discrimination.

Ms. Jenkins is Linus's strict, humorless manager at DICOMY. She constantly monitors her employees for minor infractions, enforcing a sterile, heavily surveilled work environment where personal items are strictly forbidden.

Gunther is an assistant to Ms. Jenkins at the Department in Charge of Magical Youth. He functions as an enforcer of the department's dreary, oppressive workplace rules, aiding management in maintaining total surveillance over the caseworkers.

Mrs. Klapper is Linus's nosy, grouchy neighbor in the city. She frequently intercepts him on his walk home to deliver complaints, spread gossip, and aggressively suggest that he date her accountant grandson.

Calliope is Linus's pet cat and his sole companion during his dreary life in the city. She travels with him to Marsyas Island, where she quickly adapts to the chaotic, magical environment and explores the island's grounds.

J-Bone is the owner of the local record store in the mainland village. Unlike many of his fellow townspeople, he does not harbor prejudice against the magical children, happily treating them as ordinary customers.

Marty is an employee at J-Bone's record shop. He exhibits the extreme prejudice common in the village, dramatically attempting to exorcise Lucy when the boy visits the store.

Merle runs the local ferry service. He embodies the casual discrimination of the mainland town, deliberately overcharging the island's residents and making derogatory comments about their magical nature.

Daisy is a young telekinetic girl living in a DICOMY-regulated orphanage in the city. Her early encounter with Linus demonstrates his fair, empathetic approach to interviewing magical youth, contrasting with the nervous management of her orphanage master.

David is an eleven-year-old yeti without a family. His sudden discovery highlights the ongoing need for safe, welcoming environments for magical youth who fall outside the rigid structures of society.