Women Who Love Too Much: When You Keep Wishing and Hoping He'll Change

Norwood’s preface establishes a clear diagnostic framework for recognizing destructive relationship patterns. Norwood defines “loving too much” through specific behavioral indicators: when being in love causes pain, when conversations center obsessively on a partner’s problems, when individuals excuse harmful behavior due to childhood trauma, and when relationships threaten emotional or physical well-being. The author positions this phenomenon as an addiction comparable to substance dependency, arguing that some women become “man junkies” who use relationships to manage deep-seated fears of abandonment, unworthiness, and being alone.

Norwood’s professional background as a counselor for addiction treatment provides the foundation for her analysis. Through her work with patients with chemical dependencies (as well as their partners), she observed that codependent partners—primarily women—consistently came from severely troubled families and unconsciously recreated childhood dynamics through their relationships with men. This observation led her to conceptualize loving too much as a syndrome rooted in childhood experiences, in which women develop an addiction to the familiar pattern of rescuing and suffering.

Norwood emphasizes that recovery requires years of committed work rather than quick fixes, warning readers that the process will constantly challenge them. She positions the book as providing necessary external help for what she considers an addiction that cannot heal itself.