37 pages 1 hour read

Henry Cloud, John Townsend

Boundaries: When to Say Yes, When to Say No To Take Control of Your Life

Nonfiction | Book | Adult | Published in 1992

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Part 1, Chapters 1-3Chapter Summaries & Analyses

Part 1: “What Are Boundaries?”

Chapter 1 Summary

In the opening chapter of the book, Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend tell the story of Sherrie, whose life reached a point of unsustainability due to her lack of boundaries. By offering a play-by-play of a day in Sherrie’s life, the authors demonstrate that said life is in disarray. By refusing to be honest and forthright with her mother, Sherrie is left emotionally depleted after their interactions. Additionally, Sherrie is drained by a friend who seems to take a lot from their relationship without giving much back. At work, her boss hands her last-minute projects, which Sherries accepts, even knowing the toll this will take on her already scarce personal time. Sherrie prays to God, at the end of her rope, hoping for change.

Sherrie’s lack of boundaries with her son leads to consistent misbehavior at school, and her marriage is drained of virtually all joy. Sherrie has reached a point of desperation, where she no longer knows how to live. After the illustration of Sherrie’s life, the authors detail the rationale for their book, explaining that Sherrie reached this point because she failed to establish healthy boundaries in her life.