The sexual revolution of the mid-20th century in the US decoupled sex from reproduction through landmark cases that legalized the use of birth control, offered women reproductive rights, and established safeguards for female equality in social and professional environments. The legalization or broader acceptance of other sexual rights—such as homosexuality, pornography, and other forms of contraception—furthered a broad cultural push against puritanical and traditional views on sex and interpersonal relationships. These rights were essential to the goals of second-wave feminists, referring to the broader Western feminist movement from the 1960s to the 1980s that built on existing progress in women’s rights made in the late 18th and early 19th centuries. While these political changes broadly benefitted women, as well as the LGBT+ community, they also contributed to a cultural shift leading up to the 21st century that realigned gender dynamics and intimate relationships, a key aspect of Esther Perel’s work.

These political and social advances established what sociologist Anthony Giddens called “plastic sexuality” in his 1992 book, The Transformation of Intimacy: Sexuality, Love, and Eroticism in Modern Societies. He defined this term as a form of self-expression organized around personal identity. In Mating in Captivity, Esther Perel frames this shift as the “Era of Pleasure,” arguing that these social innovations loaded modern relationships with unprecedented expectations for companionship, erotic fulfillment, and personal meaning. This new ideal created a central conflict. As psychoanalyst Stephen A. Mitchell observes, “Whereas common wisdom claims that familiarity extinguishes love, I argue that the illusory security that familiarity often masks is endangered by genuine love, with all its accompanying risks” (Mitchell, Stephen A. “Psychoanalysis and the Degradation of Romance.” Psychoanalytic Dialogues, vol. 7, no. 1, 1997). Perel builds on this tension to articulate the paradox of intimacy and desire, asserting that the very closeness required for love can mute erotic vitality. In Mating in Captivity, she prescribes numerous ways in which to tackle this unexpected result of the sexual revolution and reestablish a healthy, erotic sexual dynamic within relationships.