Nick is the chief spokesperson and executive vice president for the Academy of Tobacco Studies. A former investigative television reporter, he uses his quick wit and charm to defend the tobacco industry against public and governmental criticism. He frequently appears on talk shows to deflect negative scientific data, claiming his primary motivation is paying his mortgage. He shares custody of his young son and maintains a socially isolated personal life.

Polly works for the Moderation Council representing the alcohol industry. She is an attractive young woman going through a divorce from an anti-overpopulation activist. She forms one-third of the Mod Squad, a weekly lunch group where she shares public relations strategies with other lobbyists representing controversial products.

Bobby represents the Society for the Advancement of Firearms and Effective Training of Youth (SAFETY). He is a born-again Christian and a Vietnam veteran who lost his left hand in a helicopter accident. He frequently defends gun rights following violent incidents.

Budd serves as the president of the Academy of Tobacco Studies. He comes from the vending machine side of tobacco sales, giving him a rougher edge than his predecessor. He constantly pushes his staff to create radical new marketing plans to increase tobacco consumption in the United States and Asia.

Doak is a wealthy, old-school tobacco tycoon and Korean War veteran. He wields massive financial influence over the Academy of Tobacco Studies and prefers to operate behind the scenes. He favors a genteel, 19th-century business approach and views aggressive expansion of tobacco markets as a personal crusade.

Jeannette is an ambitious employee at the Academy of Tobacco Studies. She has a strong working alliance with Budd Rohrabacker, who brought her over from his previous job. She frequently positions herself to take over Nick's responsibilities, using her charm and severe demeanor to advance her career.

Joey is Nick's 12-year-old son. He attends St. Euthanasia, an expensive private school. He spends alternating weekends with his father, often sharing pizza and watching classic movies together.

Gazelle works as Nick's assistant at the Academy of Tobacco Studies. She manages his heavy influx of daily messages, which routinely includes media requests, business updates, and anonymous death threats.

Heather is a young investigative reporter writing for the conservative Washington Moon newspaper. She is working on a series about the New Puritanism and seeks to understand the personal motivations of lobbyists who represent unpopular industries. She uses her investigative skills to uncover controversial details about her subjects.

Lorne is a former advertising icon known for decades as the cowboy face of Tumbleweed cigarettes. He now suffers from terminal lung cancer and uses his remaining time to publicly condemn the industry that once employed him.

Jeff is a powerful Hollywood agent and producer who negotiates massive product placement deals. He operates from a palatial, glass-enclosed office and routinely brokers agreements involving high-profile celebrities and international billionaires. He views himself as quasi-royalty within the entertainment industry.

Jack is an eager assistant working for Hollywood super-agent Jeff Megall. He manages schedules and coordinates transportation while ensuring visitors understand his boss's immense industry influence.

Lady Bent is the former prime minister of Great Britain. She currently receives a large annual retainer to speak favorably about the tobacco industry and utilize her political clout to open international markets.

Senator Finisterre represents Vermont and leads a legislative effort to mandate skull-and-crossbones images on all tobacco products. He frequently debates industry representatives on national television.

Gomez is an investigative officer and security specialist for the Academy of Tobacco Studies. He monitors anti-smoking advocates and tracks internal corporate threats with a quiet, observant demeanor.

Reverand Griggs is the headmaster at St. Euthanasia, the private school Joey Naylor attends. He openly dislikes the tobacco industry but remains willing to solicit financial donations from the Academy to support his struggling school.

Dr. Wheat is an osteopath who helps manage the extreme physical symptoms of Nick's high-stress career. He performs spinal manipulations and administers injections to alleviate his patient's discomfort.

Steve is a highly skilled attorney based in Washington. He specializes in defending corporate clients and managing complex federal investigations.

Ron represents the Office of Substance Abuse Prevention at the Department of Health and Human Services. He participates in televised panels to argue for increased government funding to combat smoking.

Robin is a teenager suffering from lung cancer. He participates in anti-smoking campaigns to illustrate the severe health consequences of tobacco use.

Sven is an advertising agent based in Minneapolis. He designs corporate campaigns, including a youth initiative specifically structured to fail at reducing teen smoking rates.

Hector is Polly Bailey's estranged husband. He spends most of his time traveling internationally to promote strict anti-overpopulation measures.

Amanda is Nick's ex-wife. She manages the primary custody of their son, Joey, while Nick takes alternating weekends.