The psychological manipulation central to The Divorce taps into a widespread cultural conversation around the term “gaslighting,” which surged in popular discourse during the 2010s and 2020s. The term originates from the 1938 play Gas Light and its 1944 film adaptation, in which a husband manipulates his wife into believing she has a mental illness by, among other things, denying that the gas lights in their home are dimming. In contemporary use, it describes a form of emotional abuse where a perpetrator systematically undermines a victim’s perception of reality. This concept became so prevalent in discussions of both personal relationships and public misinformation that Merriam-Webster named “gaslighting” its Word of the Year in 2022, noting a 1,740% increase in lookups (“Word of the Year 2022.” Merriam-Webster). Discussions on social-media platforms like TikTok and Instagram further amplified awareness, bringing terms like “gaslighting” and “narcissism” into mainstream conversation about analyzing toxic relationships, a phenomenon referred to as “therapy speak” (Isern-Mas, Carme, and Manuel Almagro. “Unmasking Therapy-Speak.” Theoretical Medicine and Bioethics, vol. 46, no. 6, 2025, pp. 465-89).

In the novel, Jeremy repeatedly gaslights Naomi, making her question her own memory and stability. For example, he insists that she arrived an hour late for a pickup, claiming he told her nine o’clock when she’s certain he said 10. This causes Naomi to doubt herself and feel responsible for his anger. The dynamic is explicitly named when Naomi’s friend Cora tells her, “He’s gaslighting you” (158). By framing the marital conflict through this modern psychological lens, the novel makes its characters’ actions resonate with contemporary anxieties about emotional abuse and control in intimate relationships.