Gather initial thoughts and broad opinions about the book.

1. The novel shifts between deep sadness, like Teddy’s death and Hettie’s cruelty, and moments of great warmth and humor, especially with Vera. How did this blend of tones work for you as a reader? Did you find that it created a more realistic portrait of a life fully lived?

2. How did you react to the framing device of Emmeline telling her life story to a memoir-writing class? How did this structure shape your experience with Emmeline’s journey?

3. Discuss the secrets revealed at the end, particularly Emmeline’s relationship with Prudence as the great love of her life and the source of her wealth. Did you find this conclusion satisfying? How did it change your understanding of Emmeline’s character and the choices she made throughout her life?

Encourage readers to connect the book’s themes and characters with their personal experiences.

1. Emmeline built a chosen family with Prudence and then with Vera; in the present-day timeline, she also builds one with her friends Mrs. Tucker and Una. Think about the important relationships in your own life. How does the book’s exploration of friendships that become family resonate with your own experiences?

2. Teddy’s simple philosophy of offering a “spoonful of kindness” became Emmeline’s guiding principle (9). Can you recall a time when a small act of kindness, either given or received, had a surprisingly large impact on you or someone else?

3. After decades away, Emmeline returns to the family farm and must confront the memories held within that space. Have you ever returned to a significant place from your past? What feelings or memories did that experience bring up for you?

4. The memoir-writing class becomes a lifeline for Emmeline and the other women, creating a space for them to be heard and valued. What role has sharing stories, whether your own or others’, played in building connections in your life?

Examine the book’s relevance to societal issues, historical events, or cultural themes.

1. How does the novel use the Darling family’s story to illustrate the destructive and long-lasting impact of World War I on soldiers and the families they left behind? 

2. What does the novel reveal about the rigid social-class system in post-WWI England through Emmeline’s relationship with Bertie and the Grenville family? In what ways have these kinds of social barriers changed or remained the same today?

Dive into the book’s structure, characters, themes, and symbolism.

1. What did you think of the novel’s structure, which alternates between Emmeline’s present in 1968 and the reading of her memoir? How did this dual timeline create suspense and deepen your understanding of how her past shapes her present?

2. The spoons in this story are a central symbol. How did your understanding of Emmeline’s spoon stealing evolve from a simple quirk to a reflection of her search for kindness?

3. Hettie is the source of Emmeline’s deepest wounds. Do you see her as a villain, a tragic figure undone by her own grief, or something more complex? What moments, if any, made you feel sympathy for her?

4. How does the family farm transform from a place of trauma and isolation into a site of healing and future promise? What key events or actions contribute to this transformation throughout the story?

5. What purpose does Vera serve in the narrative beyond providing comic relief? How does this element of fabulism contribute to the novel’s exploration of loneliness, companionship, and unconditional love?

6. The Author’s Note reveals that the core tragedies are drawn from Crewe’s own family history. How does the novel compare to other works rooted in family history, like Frank McCourt’s Angela’s Ashes?

Encourage imaginative and creative connections to the book.

1. Imagine you have the chance to give a symbolic “spoonful of kindness” to one character in the novel who’s hurting. Who would you choose, what would your gesture be, and why do you think it would help them?

2. If you were Louise inheriting the farm, what would be your first project? How would you balance honoring the family’s history with creating your own vision for the property?