Jeremy is a socially awkward high school sophomore who feels invisible and inadequate. He intensely tracks his social status and believes a higher rank will solve his anxieties. Desperate to change his life, he buys a black-market supercomputer pill designed to make him cool.

Christine is a bright, theater-loving student who plans to major in psychology. She has her own complex systems for categorizing relationships and values good conversation. She prefers authenticity over standard social posturing.

Michael is Jeremy's loyal, music-obsessed best friend. He refuses to participate in the school's typical social hierarchy, choosing instead to confidently be himself. He loves emo rock and is unbothered by what popular kids think of him.

The Squip is an illegal, ingestible quantum supercomputer from Japan. It speaks directly into Jeremy's mind using the voice of actor Keanu Reeves, offering constant and highly technical advice on how to improve his social standing. It uses advanced probability to dictate everything from posture to clothing choices.

Rich is a school bully who miraculously transformed from an unpopular student into a cool kid. He possesses inside knowledge about the black-market technology that facilitates drastic social makeovers and points Jeremy in the right direction to find it.

Jake is a popular football player at Middle Borough High School. He fits perfectly into the traditional high school social hierarchy and dates Christine.

Chloe is an exceptionally popular and attractive student who frequently attends parties. Her attention serves as a primary marker of social success for boys looking to climb the high school ladder.

Brooke is one of the cool girls Rich introduces to Jeremy. She is part of the exclusive popular circle that Jeremy desperately wants to join.

Stephanie is considered one of the most desirable girls at school. Beneath her flawless external image, she struggles privately with extreme insecurities and dangerous habits.

Jenna is known as the coolest girl in Jeremy's math class. She acts as a central hub for school rumors and actively dictates who is considered socially acceptable through her constant talk.

Anne is a student in Jeremy's math class who frequently absorbs the local rumors. She serves as an audience for the more dominant popular students.

Mark is a fellow student in the school play. He spends his time absorbed in his Game Boy and casually harasses students he views as socially inferior.

Rack is a black-market dealer who sells bootleg technology out of the back of a mall shoe store. He provides the specific pill Jeremy is searching for.

Jeremy's mother works as a divorce lawyer. She frequently worries about her son's behavior and tries to manage her husband's weight by buying him fitness gifts he refuses to use.

Jeremy's father is a successful but overweight divorce lawyer. He lacks physical boundaries at home and often makes inappropriate, outdated comments about Jeremy's romantic life.

Brock is a belligerently jealous high school student who attends local house parties. He uses physical intimidation to mark his territory.

Nicole is a high schooler who moderates an online hip-hop forum under the username snow_bunny. She shares an authentic connection with Michael over music.