Everyone in This Bank Is a Thief

Benjamin Stevenson
64 pages2-hour read
Fiction
Novel
Adult
Published in 2026

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Part 6-Part 8Chapter Summaries & Analyses

Content Warning: This section of the guide includes discussion of illness, addiction, suicidal ideation, child death, and death.

Part 6: “A Heart (See Also: One Hundred and Fifty Thousand and Fifty Dollars)” - Part 8: “The Eighth Heist: A Red Script, a Lock of Hair, and a Coffee Cup”

Part 6, Chapter 32 Summary

Ernest publicly confronts Cordelia, accusing her of faking her heart condition. He pointed out that her 480-day Duolingo streak (which she had completed before Bryce had taken her phone) started on the very day of her supposed terminal diagnosis, which suggests she had never lost hope. He also reveals that her spilled IV bag, left in the lobby in the original robbery, had contained harmless saline, and that Laverna forced her to take actual heart medication to induce symptoms and maintain the deception.


Cornered, Cordelia confesses. She had broken her arm as a child and discovered she liked the way she was treated when people thought she was sick or injured. She had faked concussions and other illnesses. Then she and Laverna moved to Huxley and met Emma Fredericks, who was actually terminally ill and waiting for a heart transplant. Cordelia’s act didn’t work anymore.


She and Laverna had hatched a plan: They stole Emma’s medical records and changed them to appear to be Cordelia’s, and then they created a fraudulent online fundraiser. The plan backfired because it took too long to reach their goal, and they were unexpectedly moved to the top of the organ transplant list, ahead of Emma.

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