54 pages 1 hour read

Leil Lowndes

How To Talk To Anyone

Nonfiction | Book | Adult | Published in 1998

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Part 9Chapter Summaries & Analyses

Part 9: “How to Break the Most Treacherous Glass Ceiling of All”

Part 9, Chapter 78 Summary: “How to Win Their Affection by Overlooking Their Bloopers”

The implications of minor errors or “bloopers” can be significant, serving as barriers to acceptance by a group. These bloopers can range from physical disabilities to perceived physical or verbal mistakes during conversation to something more serious, such as an ableist judgment of a physical disability. People often judge others based on these “bloopers,” but the most successful communicators overlook potential distractions to focus on the substance of interactions. An anecdote highlights a corporate lunch during which top executives didn’t allow a dropped tray or spilled coffee to interrupt meaningful dialogue. Successful communicators create an atmosphere where everyone can enjoy the illusion of being flawless by ignoring trivialities.

Part 9, Chapter 79 Summary: “How to Win Their Heart When Their Tongue Is Faltering”

The importance of attentiveness is highlighted through rescuing interrupted stories. When a person’s story or joke is interrupted by a distraction, the speaker often feels deflated and overlooked. By encouraging the speaker to continue after the interruption, one can build subtle rapport—“Lend a Helping Tongue.” This simple act of recognition not only ingratiates one with the speaker but demonstrates one’s sensitivity to the rest of the group.