Because I Killed Him

Edith Birde

Because I Killed Him

Edith Birde
73 pages2-hour read
Fiction
Novel
Adult
Published in 2026

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Symbols & Motifs

Content Warning: This section of the guide includes discussion of death and emotional abuse.

The Guillotine

The guillotine, featured both in the courtyard at Grandmaster and in the weekly televised spectacle known as “Bloody Sunday,” symbolizes the state’s use of Systemic Violence as a Political Tool. Whenever Loredana walks past the university’s guillotine or is made to watch the state’s latest executions, she’s painfully reminded of the consequences should she ever fail to uphold the many laws and restrictions that Public Persons are required to endure. The presence of the guillotine, deeply entwined in everyday life, is a deliberate tool of psychological control. Similarly, the gilded, golden version that appears in the televised spectacles presents a paradoxical blending of luxury and cruelty, implying that the sumptuous surroundings of the Civilized World are inseparable from the vicious policies that destroy the lives of so many citizens.

The Energy Shield

As Loredana bitterly observes, the energy shield both protects and imprisons the genetically engineered inhabitants of the so-called Civilized World, connecting to the theme of Surrendering Dignity for the Sake of Survival. Officially, the shield defends the population from the external threat of the Rangers, an armed faction operating beyond the borders. However, while the national propaganda maintains that the shield enables the creation of an ostensibly utopian sanctuary, its inescapable presence also traps citizens within this brutally repressive society. The Heretics, who condemn the corruption of the Blues’ regime, seek the shield’s destruction, seeing it as the only path to dismantling this unjust hierarchy. When the Rangers finally breach the shield, the event shatters the illusion of safety and exposes the fragility of the Civilized World.

The Aegis

The Aegis is a specialized ring that has been repurposed from the Blood Ring of a deceased high-citizen and granted to a favored low-citizen. Those who are lucky enough to wear an Aegis are elevated above their low-citizen peers, but they remain subordinate to the Blues. This intermediate status reveals that the true sources of power in the Civilized World are maintained in carefully calibrated tiers of dependency. Although the Aegis creates a liminal, shadowy middle class, it doesn’t dissolve hierarchy entirely, and those who belong to this select group become so dependent on their privileges that they become even more invested in ensuring the continuation of the very system that has oppressed them.


The symbol’s significance shifts as different characters acquire it under different circumstances. When Edmund gives Aegises to Jack and Dickie, he’s genuinely attempting to shield his orphaned friends from a world designed to crush them. Yet when Loredana receives hers from Jerome, the Aegis becomes an instrument of state power, binding her to a covert operation in exchange for survival. In both cases, the wearer gains freedom only by accepting a new form of obligation. The Aegis thus embodies the novel’s broader interrogation of whether true autonomy can exist within a system that commodifies every relationship. In the end, the Aegis glitters like a promise of equality, but its blue glow serves as a constant reminder that the power it confers was never the wearer’s to begin with.

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