“[W]hat they see makes them point or stop and turn and put their hands on their hips and breathe deep but the distance they love is an out of focus blur when I try to look where they’re looking.”

The narrator lives beneath the Hollywood sign, and often overhears or watches hikers that pass by. The hikers always talk about the city of Los Angeles, and take in the view from the Hollywood sign. The narrator, who can only see a blur in the distance, struggles to understand what the people that pass by see and value in this city. This is another instance of Henry Hoke developing the narrator’s identity as an animal, and the confusion they feel.

“[A]nd that’s how I found them a while ago and found their pile of trash and the smaller animals that come to eat their trash and offer themselves up to get eaten by me.”

The narrator wants to belong somewhere, and be accepted rather than feared, reflecting Forging Queer Identity Through a Desire to Belong. When they find the unhoused encampment, they hope for a symbiotic sort of relationship. The trash of the unhoused attracts vermin, which feeds the mountain lion, and by eating these vermin, the narrator keeps them from overwhelming the unhoused encampment.

“[A]t dusk I feel alone enough 

I chance a growl but the earth growls louder 

the ground feels wrong my paws aren’t attached anymore.”

In this excerpt, the narrator describes an earthquake as the ground growling back at them. By describing the event this way, Hoke further develops the narrator as an animal by limiting the narrator’s vocabulary. When the narrator describes the earthquake as a growl, it is as if the earth itself is a predator.

“[B]ut even here in the cave I know I’m still outside I’m not in a tent like the people in town and it doesn’t make it better that the shudder happened and won’t make it better if it happens again.”

The mountain lion often considers how they fare in comparison to humans. In this instance, they recognize the advantages that people have with homes and even tents. Their ability to retreat from the wild and any dangers is radically different from the narrator’s own living situation. Even though they live in a cave, presumably protected, they are still in the wild. After the earthquake, the narrator overhears hikers saying it is better to be outside during an earthquake, but for the mountain lion, always outside, the threat is always the same.

“I think about blood raining from the sky and I roll onto my back and stretch and claw the air and open my mouth and think of catching all the blood rain in my mouth and it quenching my thirst and making it go away in a way it hasn’t since I was small.”

In this excerpt, the narrator imagines blood falling from the sky. The thirst they experience is painful, and when they think of how to quench it, blood comes to the forefront of their mind. The persistent hardship of the drought also speaks to Ecological Decay and Urban Wilderness.

“[M]y new thicket is a nest of twisted trees above a path 

hikers come by all day while I rest but I’m ten feet above them and they never suspect 

from here I wouldn’t even have to leap I’d just have to drop and whichever hiker I wanted would be mine.”

The narrator is a mountain lion, and an apex predator. One of the narrator’s most prominent features is its restraint as a predator in the park. They do not want to hurt or attack any of the hikers that walk by, though they know that if they wanted to, they could. Their desire to fit in and survive keeps them from truly exploring their identity as a predator.

“I don’t know if I feel good or bad / if feeling hungry is bad then I almost always feel hungry so maybe I almost always feel bad / a therapist can help me with this.”

Once again, the narrator’s vocabulary is limited in terms of how they process their feelings. They know that they feel strange, but cannot identify it, only knowing how hunger feels in their stomach. After hearing about therapists from passing hikers, the narrator considers their own need for one. The narrator’s outsider view of human emotions and practices like therapy reflect The Disillusioning Nature of Human Society the narrator eventually experiences.

“[B]ad cat 

he throws the bottle and it hits my front paw hard and I tip sideways and he runs uphill and all the ground dirt floats in the air of the bad morning and I watch it blow away and the young man stops and turns and looks down at me to make sure I’m going 

he looks at me like my father.”

The narrator carries trauma from their time in the wilderness before coming to Los Angeles. This stems from the abuse and hatred of their father. Their father sees them as a threat, kills their mother, and chases them out of their territory. Now, when the narrator interacts with people, it often assesses how people think of them by whether they look like the narrator’s father. In this scene, the man looks at the narrator with the same hatred, forcing the narrator to confront the fact that the unhoused encampment does not see them as a member of their community. This moment reflects Forging Queer Identity Through a Desire to Belong and how that desire is often thwarted for the narrator.

“[M]y skin is starting to get loose and some of my fur drags and tugs on things it didn’t or tug on before 

it’s okay 

old is fine 

I’m old because I’m not dead.”

Hoke uses the different experiences of the narrator and people to critique human values and reflect The Disillusioning Nature of Human Society. In this excerpt, the narrator considers how they view aging, drawing a stark contrast between themselves and the people of Los Angeles. The narrator sees aging as a good thing, something to be proud of. It means that they survive, defend themselves, and keep moving forward. With many hikers going by discussing superficial and selfish matters, the narrator’s point of view creates dissonance in which the values of people can be better analyzed.

“[O]n their knees and the one in front has his hands planted flat like my paws against the dirt 

there’s a hot scent where they’re connecting 

my eyes are full 

the motion they make reminds me of the shudder but in a way that makes it okay.”

When the narrator sees two men having sex in the cave, they watch with interest. They immediately recognize the position they are in, and associates it with themself. This comparison suggests that the narrator sees their action as natural. The narrator further explores this by watching their movements, which reminds the narrator of the earthquake. Unlike the earthquake, these moves do not threaten the narrator.

“I follow the street and enjoy the dead silence of a park abandoned by everything that flies and shouts.”

Being in Los Angeles, the narrator is always surrounded by others. This creates a lot of noise that prevents the narrator from feeling at home, like they once did in the woods. After the fire, as they explore the smoky park, they enjoy the silence. There are no helicopters flying by, or hikers talking, or people screaming in terror at them. It is one of the few times in the novel that the narrator feels as though they belong where they are while also speaking to Ecological Decay and Urban Wilderness.

“[E]very ten steps I take I’m at a new net or a new clear wall and there’s a new animal somewhere behind it and some shriek or some rustle erupts as I pass.”

Even when the narrator encounters other animals at the zoo, they find that they are not welcome, complicating their experience of Forging Queer Identity Through a Desire to Belong. These animals, like the narrator, do not belong in the city, many being wild and from different parts of the world. They are not native to the area like the narrator, creating a similar relationship between them and the narrator as the narrator has with people. These animals reject the narrator, demonstrating fear and desire to avoid them. This moment contributes to the narrator’s ongoing isolation and inability to find community, even when in the company of other animals.

“[T]wo men step out of the car and they make noise with long sticks that end in spinning blades like tiny fucking helicopters and they stand across the street and drag the blades across the hedges sending pieces of green flying up in the air.”

Hoke uses the narrator’s ignorance as a way to creatively explore the urban wilderness of Los Angeles in a unique way. When the narrator sees men landscaping, they neither know what they are doing or what they are using. They describe weedwhackers as sticks with helicopter blades on them. This description helps to further characterize the narrative as one told by a wild animal, as well as create the sense that the city, so familiar to human readers, can be a dangerous and confusing place, invoking Ecological Decay and Urban Wilderness.

“[I]n my whole life I’ve been seen by only a few people and each time was a failing of my stealth and my mother’s lessons 

but this moment is not like those moments.”

When the narrator meets Little Slaughter for the first time, they feel as though they belong. They reflect on how their mother taught them to stay hidden, and how they used these lessons to lurk in the shadows, keeping themselves safe. In this instance, Little Slaughter sees them in spite of their efforts. Unlike other times, her reaction is not one of fear, but connection, reflecting Forging Queer Identity Through a Desire to Belong.

“I can’t tell her my real one / my mother gave it to me when she first saw me lick blood off my lips / it’s not made of noises a person can make.”

Throughout much of Open Throat, the narrator does not have a name. They only use the personal pronoun “I.” When Little Slaughter names them Heckit, the narrator accepts the name but remembers the name their mother gave them. The narrator’s certainty that humans cannot pronounce their name reinforces the distance between the narrator and human society.

“I see my mother lying still beneath my father and I see the kill sharer lying still beside the long death and I see my own body lying still in the flood 

with my last breath I think the word please 

let me start over.”

When the narrator confronts death, nearly drowning beneath Slaughter’s house, they think of those they lost. In their life, the narrator only has two people who loved them. Their mother protected them, and the Kill Sharer showed kindness. With both gone, the narrator is alone. As they think that they are also about to die, they plead to start over. This demonstrates how the narrator’s desire to belong is central to how they live their lives, and now that they think it is over, they hope for a chance to do better.

“I look again at the picture 

that can’t be me it doesn’t have a smell 

I don’t trust screens to tell me who I am.”

As a wild animal, the narrator does not understand human technology. When Little Slaughter shows them a picture of them taken in the park, the narrator refuses to believe her. Unlike people, the narrator relies on smells to understand the world around them. The comment, “I don’t trust screens to tell me who I am,” provides a subtle, humorous commentary on The Disillusioning Nature of Human Society, gesturing to how many humans are concerned with image and spend a lot of time seeking to define themselves via their “screens,” i.e., social media and other forms of tech.

“[T]he cat looks through the glass and it looks through me 

like why aren’t I out hunting why am I inside 

why isn’t this person my prey.”

While the narrator lives with Little Slaughter, they lead a new life, acting as a pet and receiving food from Little Slaughter rather than hunting. They begin to act more like a human, and one night, when they see a cat through the window, they realize how antithetical this is to their previous life. The cat is a hunter, and despite being much smaller, shames the narrator. This once again throws the narrator into a dilemma, reflecting Forging Queer Identity Through a Desire to Belong.

“[I]t’s weirdly quiet in the car like we’re in a bubble protected from the speeding world outside.”

Hoke rarely uses similes in Open Throat, though when he does, it explores the unique perspective of the narrator. In this excerpt, the narrator is dreaming of being in a car on the way to Disney. The narrator compares the quiet of the car to that of a being in a bubble. This description suggests that the narrator believes it is the world, and not the car, that is moving. Since the narrator has not been in a car previously, this dream is fully of their imagining.

“[A]nd some of the kids come over and pet me and little slaughter lets them and they say she’s beautiful and little slaughter says it’s her birthday and the kids tie a birthday ribbon around my neck and we walk down the wide main street together.”

In this dream, the narrator imagines what it might be like to walk around and have no one be afraid of them, invoking Forging Queer Identity Through a Desire to Belong. In the park, Little Slaughter walks the narrator around, introducing them to kids and telling everyone it is the narrator’s birthday. Rather than running away or being afraid, the kids show kindness and interest in the narrator. In this dream, the narrator experiences the sense of belonging they crave.

“I’m on two legs and it feels permanent 

a person in a cat suit 

my paws drop to my sides and they’re ready to grasp.”

The narrator struggles with the desire to fit in as themselves and fit in by mimicking humans. In their dream, they imagine themselves as anthropomorphized. They stand on two legs, imagining that they are merely a person in a cat suit. This passage reflects how people with queer identities often feel pressured to conform in order to be accepted.

“[T]he car is a quiet bubble though and I enjoy the quiet after the screaming and running and breaking in the slaughter house.”

When the narrator does finally ride in a car, they find it similar to the one in their dream. The car is quiet, something the narrator rarely experiences, particularly in Slaughter’s house. The narrator craves quiet throughout the novel, and the bubble of the car acts as an escape for them. The phrase “the slaughter house” is reminiscent of an abattoir, foreshadowing the violent death the narrator will soon inflict on the man with the whip.

“[O]n quiet midnights back in the caves I could almost imagine that all the people were gone 

canyons cleared of their footsteps and voices and cars 

the long deaths standing still 

trees expanding and their green swallowing the buildings and returning the original smells.”

In the car, the narrator sees the man with the whip again, and remembers the violence the man did, both with his whip and fire. These memories push the narrator to realize that the problems they encounter in Los Angeles are man-made, bringing The Disillusioning Nature of Human Society to its culmination. They remember thinking of how better the world would be if there were no humans. Not only would there be no noise, but nature would also reclaim the city, and the smells of civilization would disappear.